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My all time favourite movies by genre
Reviews
The Crow (2024)
Mixed bag
Fantastic soundtrack and set design/visuals meets bare bones wooden scriptwriting and some highly questionable casting choices (the main big bad and FKA Twigs I'm looking at you).
I'm not familiar with the graphic novels so I can't comment on how true to them this updated version of The Crow is, but one thing that is "graphic" is the third act which has some gleefully gory moments that jar with what has come before.
As a movie It's frustrating because it could've been so much more and even with Skaarsgard giving it his all its a poor comparison to the original. However when taken as a standalone project it's passable for a couple of hours entertainment. 6/10.
Gran Turismo (2023)
Tonally bizarre
What a strange movie this is.
First off, In 2011 I watched and was hooked by the GT academy series Jann Mardenborough won, I've played and enjoyed the Gran Turismo games, I'm a big Motorsport fan and I appreciate Motorsport based movies like Rush, Le Man 66 (ford v Ferrari), The Art of Racing in the Rain and even Days Of thunder.
So with all that in mind I seem like the absolute target audience to have a blast watching this movie.
What I felt instead was whiplash from the changes in tone, confused by the innacuracies in timeline and dramatic license being used and bewilderment that the entire movie was allegedly directed by Neill Blomkamp.
The first two thirds of the movie seem to be directed solely by a committee of shareholders from Sony and Nissan. It's like an extended advert for both companies with no directorial flourishes or tension at all, it's like a bad Disney live action movie featuring cut out characters.
Then we get "the incident" and suddenly the movie becomes something different and switches gears into an engaging drama. It seems like this is the bit Blomkamp actually directed and makes the movie as a whole quite a bizarre experience.
I'm not sure what others are seeing to give this movie such glowing reviews but for me it can't recover from how cliche' and tropey the first 2 acts are, even if the 3rd act does bring it up to an average standard.
The Mystery of Anthrax Island (2022)
The shame brought into the light
This is a fascinating documentary about the destruction and rebirth of Gruinard island in the Highlands of Scotland.
It highlights the ability of the establishment to run roughshod over the environment, people and places without a care until it is forced to address it's actions.
Documentaries like this one are important as tools to educate the masses about what their governments are truly like without the filter of a biased and institution entrenched media to whitewash their actions.
It's well made, atmospheric and interesting throughout, and at 55 minutes it doesn't outstay it's welcome. Highly recommended.
Beyond the Noise (2018)
Not your average surf movie
Well this is certainly a strange one! It's a surf movie as told through the lens of existential horror. From the muted colours, lack of lighting, bleak backdrops and jarringly haunting soundtrack (which reminded me a bit of the Tron Legacy OST by Daft Punk) to the narrator gloomily reciting lines about how humanity has lost its way and is now a slave to the modern world, it's not exactly a cheery experience so don't go in expecting a celebration of all things surf culture. It does have its own melancholic beauty though and it was refreshing to experience something different from standard surf movie tropes.
The Old Way (2023)
Nicolage cage at his absolute worst
After the relative success of Pig and The Unbearable weight of Massive Talent I thought I'd give a resurgent Cage another chance, in the hope this wouldn't be a return to his "phoned in" low budget roles of late.
I'm genuinely baffled how he manages to act so sublimely in one movie then be so utterly atrocious in others. It seems like it must take more effort to ignore all his talents, training etc and act in such a wooden, almost spooflike fashion. That sums up his violent stoic man trying to be good role here though.
As for the rest of the movie, it's so chocked full of tropes that it seems like a highlight reel of outtakes from low budget campy westerns.
I'm struggling to find a single redeemable moment, I suppose the cinematography is ok. That's about as positive I can be.
Bandit (2022)
Paint by numbers glorification of "cool" crimes.
If 5 stars was a movie, this would be it. Average acting, script, directing, editing, and clichéd story. It absolutely sticks between the lines of cool crime morality.
The protagonist is seen as charismatic, has a criminals morals (won't hurt real people or rob from the working person), tries to tow the line between a normal life and his criminal one, and (shock) gets pulled back in for "one last job". Bet you can't work out how that goes?
From the start to the last scene it's devoid of any creativity, flair, or any real missteps either. If you've seen enough of these movies you can literally guess the next cut or scene, It's as average as average gets.
Elvis (2022)
What a waste of an incredible story.
The great parts :
Austin Butler's outstanding performance. All three 3 stars of my review lie here.
The ok parts :
The set design and some of the cinematography
The bad parts : literally everything else. From the mindboggling decision to base the movie on an 80s Batman movie villain version of Colonel Parker instead of Elvis, to Tom Hanks portrayal of said character complete with scene chewing overacting and bizarre accent,(Especially galling when Butler oozes charisma in every scene that he IS allowed to shine in).
Then there's the bewildering idea to feature modern music, including rap of all things instead of well, Elvis songs.
It's frustrating, annoying, incoherent, deliberately obnoxious, overly meandering and a huge missed opportunity.
I purged it by watching the 1979 Elvis biopic starring Kurt Russell and directed by John Carpenter after. It has its faults but at least Elvis is the main character and it's actually coherent.
The Fastest Woman on Earth (2022)
Emotional, inciteful, exhilarating.
I'm in the rare position to review this documentary blind. I went in spoiler free as I don't keep up with current events or watch much mainstream TV. Jessi Combs was unknown to me before watching. I was interested in it as I once kept up with land speed record attempts and have seen the two Thrust cars at the Coventry Motor Museum in the UK.
If you also want to be spoiler free stop reading and watch it now, I highly recommend it.
Getting to know Jessi in the nearly two hour run time was exhilarating and inspiring, she had a wild spirit and was brave enough to do what she loved. She was also self aware, knowing that following those dreams meant other parts of her life were suffering and this is explored too.
I'm sure not many people will be in my position but seeing her final run for the new record and not knowing the outcome ahead of time was shocking but very respectfully portrayed. It's a huge shame that someone so talented and young lost her life in that way but she achieved what she set out to do, that's something we all aspire for.
I could've done without the religious aspects but other than that I was thoroughly engrossed for the whole run time.
Black Widow (2021)
Not Marvel-lous, but VERY Hollywood.
I only made it to the 40th minute, this snapshot of the movie consisted of = CGI chase scene, OTT fight scene, CGI chase scene, OTT fight scene, CGI chase scene.... If you look very closely you can see a pattern emerging. I noped out of the rest before seeing if the mind-numbing pattern continued for the rest of the 135 minute run time before my brain turned completely to mush.
Last Call (2019)
So much more than I expected.
From the art style and the lack of fanfare (I had to put the year in to even find the right movie on IMDb) I was expecting the typical low budget, high concept offering with a bit of promise, using amateurish actors to create an ok movie, that's ultimately instantly forgettable. THIS MOVIE IS NOT THAT.
The one take aesthetic and split screen cinematography works just perfectly to convey the urgency of a serendipitous conversation between a woman in the right/wrong place and a man with nowhere left to turn. The acting from Sarah Booth in particular is astonishing (never seen her in anything before this), the dialogue is realistic and the soundtrack fits the mood just right.
I've never seen anything like it, the closest I can think of right now is Locke with Tom Hardy, but this movie is so much better and more heartfelt than that.
I'll be recommending it to everyone I know. 9/10.
(And no I'm not a paid reviewer or have anything to do with the production, look at my other reviews!)
Scarface (1983)
Aged like a fine milk.
It's like watching a 3 hour X rated episode of The A Team, except the bad guys win. (And nowhere near as entertaining or fun as that premise sounds).
The Last Storm (2018)
Completely forgettable
How has this got a rating of 7.4?!?!? Two men sit in a car for 15 minutes saying nothing of any consequence, see a tornado, go home. The end.
Greenland (2020)
Way better than most disaster movies
The characters act like real people, there is consistency of plot, it's not overly improbable. All very strange things to say about a disaster film!
After the Wave (2014)
Respect and dignity
This is an extremely respectful documentary about the aftermath of the boxing day tsunami in Thailand. It shows footage of the disaster as it happened and the aftermath including bodies strewn on beaches but It doesn't linger on these images and at times blurs details. It has haunting interviews with survivors and family of people who died, but at no time is the drama sensationalised.
The narrative is mainly focussed on the brave and selfless people tasked with the truly overwhelming job of identifying the thousands of bodies so loved ones can have closure. It discusses the methods used, the effect it has on their mental health and the obstacles in their path.
The fact that so many bodies WERE identified is a credit to these people and the documentary is a tribute to their effort and sacrifice.
It's a thoroughly interesting watch from start to finish, don't expect happy endings though, this isn't Hollywood.
RAF at 100 with Ewan and Colin McGregor (2018)
An enjoyable overview of 100 years of military flight
Spectacular footage from a century of aerial warfare meets the MacGregor brothers earnest interviewing of battle veterans, to create an interesting and enjoyable 90 minute documentary.
I particularly found the work of the ATA fascinating and the 2 surviving ladies from the organisation were inspirational.
For people interested in history, human endeavour, flight or fans of previous Ewan MacGregor reality programmes like Long Way Down (as well as the casual viewer of course). 8/10.
Interreflections (2020)
A possible antidote for this crazy world
It's not subtle, in fact it's naive at times but this cautionary and unique vision of a possible future is enthralling throughout.
I initially planned to break up the near 3 hour run time in to 2 or 3 chunks but once I turned it on I was intrigued and fascinated enough to watch it in one go....I've watched programmes of an hour that feel longer!
At its heart is the story of the unsustainable way much of our society currently lives... with particular focus on the not so shining light of the capitalist/consumerist world, the USA and its numerous problems.
It gives an intelligent, thought-provoking and inciteful view of all that's wrong with our power/greed/money worshipping culture and offers a possible alternative to this way of life.
It plays out as a sci-fi feature of sorts, using actors, scenes and different metaphors to highlight the movies point. At no point are the audience treated as fools and the different genres and mood changes broke up the lecture heavy moments to create a truly memorable experience.
My hope is that in watching this movie, some people may decide they aren't willing to put up with the unsustainable damage we are inflicting on ourselves and our ecosystem in this version of society but will instead look for new ways of thinking and feeling to find a balance greatly needed in these most troubled of times.
Even if you are a determined consumerist, this movie is well worth a watch to see things from another point of view.
9/10
The Vast of Night (2019)
50s themed verbal diarrhoea
If you are a fan of hysterically fast talking southern US accented people droning on and on without really saying anything at all, with a backdrop of a completely generic and done to death flying saucer "suspense" story then this is the movie for you!! If you aren't then I'd suggest watching something else.
Annoying characters, cliche' story, terrible script.
Over the Limit (2017)
Shows the price of winning at any cost.
The film-maker (herself an ex gymnast) has used an extremely sparse style of documentary making here. There's no back-story, no intro, no interviews, no beautiful juxtaposition and no narration. It's a very effective way to make the viewer uneasy and wrong footed from the start... And that's how you should feel watching this true life horror show.... Unless you are into 70 minutes of verbal and psychologic abuse of course!
Now as for the main protagonists themselves... it's the story of a high level gymnast and her two coaches preparing her for the olympics in 2016. What we are unflinchingly witness to is nothing short of verbal and psychological abusive. How a fellow human being can treat someone in such a degrading, disrespectful and abusive way in the name of making them better at a SPORT is utterly beyond me. Yes the gymnast was eventually very successful, but at what cost mentally?!
One coach is so used to saying and doing whatever she pleases she thinks nothing of saying the most vile things in the name of "toughening up the gentle soul" of her young star, the other coach veers wildly from doing exactly the same one moment, to extremely inapropriate physical contact the next. It's very disturbing to watch.
And don't even start me on the IMDb description of the documentary, who wrote that ... The coaches themselves?! Calling this girl "emotionally fragile" is utterly ridiculous, the unflinching strength she shows in withstanding the bullying only makes the abuse even harder to swallow.
Watch it not for the pleasure of perfect elegance but as a study of a beautiful SPORT (as in something done for enjoyment) completely corrupted by the selfish human need for power and glory.
True Detective (2014)
Truly special
As IMDb (in its wisdom) doesn't give individual seasons their own page I'll break down my review into sections...
Season 1 : the detectives - Matthew McConauhey, Woody harrelson.
A masterful example of chemistry and acting, you can't take your eyes of every one of their interactions in the 10 hour run time. Twisting suspenseful whodunnit with an impactful climax. I won't go on too much as it's been reviewed plenty over the years. 10/10.
Season 2 : The detectives - Colin Farrell, Rachel McAdams, Taylor Kitsch.
A completely different tone to the first season, way more action/thriller than suspense/thriller but very effective in its own way.
McAdams shines throughout, Farrell is as you'd expect and an honourable mention to Vince Vaughn who chews up every scene he's in (in a good way). It's a superb 9/10 for me and not to be compared like for like with what came before.
Season 3 : the detectives - Mahershala Ali, Stephen Dorff.
I was almost put off giving this season a chance after reading some of the dire reviews on here but I'm glad I made up my own mind.
It's a return to the tone and feel (and similar rural dusty setting) of season 1. I doubt this will be one for action fans and that may be where the poor reviews stem from. Ali and Dorff play off each other very well, the acting is a career high for both.
The 3 timeframes (1980, 1990, 2015) gave their relationship real weight and the temporal jumping Nolanesque non linear story kept things from going stale. The admirable make up work made it clear which era we'd shifted to without the need to force feed the viewer information and break the story's spell.
Carmen Ejogo as Ali's muse is exceptional throughout and gives things a refreshing break from the brooding male duo's dynamic when needed. It's another 9/10 for me.
Max and Me (2020)
Much better than I was expecting
So, boy meets girl, girl turns out to be ghost, ghost helps boy to live, boy helps ghost to tick off her bucket list.
It's a well acted, querky, sweet but not too sweet, coming of age high school set drama.
What movies like this strive for is to make the older viewer melancholy and nostalgic about their time growing up, or for viewers who are at that awkward life stage to feel a little understood and give them hope that they aren't alone.. whilst being entertaining at the same time.
It did that for me so gets a solid 7/10.
Away (2020)
Those pesky commies are not to be trusted! (Say US writers)
Oh what a huge universe sized waste of a big budget and talented actors!
How the creators expected ANYONE to stomach this bunch of idiot characters as credible astronauts is utterly beyond me. Do they have literally no clue how much psychological training a team of astronauts has, all to ensure EVERYTHING in the team dynamic works absolutely fluidly?!? ANY sign of their destructive behaviour would have them thrown out of the programme from the outset, nevermind the day of the mission!
Yet this group of school children are bickering and undermining each other even before the mission even starts.
Every single one of them are the lamest stereotypes already but their playground childish arguments, disputes and back stabbing completely and utterly breaks ALL realism this show could've had. It's a huge red flag to me and ruins the whole thing.....And talking of "red" flags, making the Chinese and Russian astronauts out to be like Bond villains is so derivate it's almost laughable, it's just typical US paranoia about those awful communists who we mustn't trust at any cost, yeehaw god bless 'murica!!
It's such a shame but I won't be watching past the 2nd episode, it could (and should) have been something really enthralling but instead is an insult to sci-fi fans.
Dead to Me (2019)
Emotional rollercoaster!
Wow, that was unexpected! What starts off a bit like Afterlife (bereaved person decides to take their grief out on the world, played to comedy effect) turns in to something far more over the 10 short episodes.
It has some genuinely funny laugh out loud moments but then veers off in to pure thriller territory as it handles both impeccably.
The script feels real and the acting from the two lead actresses is astonishing, this could SO easily have been overdone and turned into cheesy melodrama but instead it hits you everywhere it should, particularly the climax.
Tenet (2020)
Could do with an "inversion" to correct huge issues
I'm a massive Christopher Nolan fanboy.... Memento, The Dark Knight and Inception are 3 of my favourite movies of all time.
Tenet however will not make it on to that list.
At times its pace is far too rushed, giving you no chance to digest the plot ideas thrown at you mid explosion, at other times its frustratingly slow, for instance focussing too intently on the dynamic of the married couple instead of explaining what the hell is going on in the world ending scenario.
Even as the movie finishes you are left to fend for yourself and make up your own idea of what's gone on.. but not in a satisfying way like inception's brave and ambiguous spinning top finale.
I feel like there was a truly great film in there somewhere, it has all the ingredients but it got lost along the way in the jarringly loud explosions and score, too sparse screenplay, paper thin characters and convenient/ confusing plot devices.
There is a lot of talk that the only way to appreciate this movie's intricacies is to watch it at least twice, this was partially true with memento too but the difference with that film was it was still understandable and incredibly rewarding on its first watch, in my view Tenet just isn't, I see it as a flaw if a story can't be thoroughly enjoyed on any level without repeat viewings or by trawling the internet afterwards for fan theories and explanation threads. I love a film that makes you think but it has to give you something intelligible back and it's themes should at least be consistent.
Such a shame as I was really looking forward to watching it and was pretty convinced I'd absolutely love it.
Instead it's a 7/10 for me for the admirable original concept, cinematography, acting and the (failed) mental workout. Could've been so much better though and doesn't come close to hitting the giddy heights of inception.
Se7en (1995)
My 2nd favourite movie of all time
I remember walking out of the cinema at the end of this film in a daze, my brain incapable of computing the audacity it had been subjected to by the unhollywood ending and stylish bleakness on display for the previous couple of hours.
It hits you like a sledgehammer and won't let go. I love a movie that makes you FEEL, and seven does that every time I've watched it in the 25 years since.
It's not for the faint of heart or people who need to see a sunny outlook on humanity, it's far too real for that.
Fantastic acting, pitch perfect direction and screenplay combine to make a true classic of cinema.
If it passed you by in the 90s (or you weren't around then!)... give it a go, it has aged beautifully.
Perfect 10 (2019)
A Little gem
This short but sweet little movie captures something of the angst of youth without shoving it in your face. The two main actors are fantastic in their roles (if you can put up with their mockney east landan chav accents), it's morally ambiguous but well directed and scripted. Well worth 85 minutes of your time.