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Reviews
The Stylist (2020)
Slow Burn With Style
Borrowing from some of the best character study horror films from the 60's and 70's, The Stylist seamlessly updates these tropes for the new age with lots of style and higher production values than expected for such a low budget film.
A lonely hairstylist takes to drugging some of her clients, scalping them, and storing said scalps in a creepy shrine underneath her house where she can put them on and pretend to be different people. She tries to shape up and stop doing this when a bride-to-be client books her for her wedding and the stylist believes this might be a true friendship in the making.
For most of its runtime, The Stylist plays like a modern mashup of Maniac, Repulsion, and May and it's anchored by a lovely performance by Najarra Townsend, who wisely underplays her character's mania. Most actresses would swing from the rafters and chew the scenery with a character like this, but she keeps her very grounded and true to life.
Townsend's performance helps fill in a lot of the script's flaws, because, as much as The Stylist seems to want us to relate for its lead character, it doesn't do an awful lot to endear her to us. We never figure out what made her start killing and collecting scalps and we never find out why she's so fixated on this particular bride-to-be. This does weaken the film and throw things off balance, because Townsend is playing the character as if she's in a nuanced character drama, but the film gives her even less development and motivation than some of the Friday the 13th sequels gave Jason.
At least The Stylist knows how to end a movie as it offers up one of the most memorable final horror film images of the past decade and the film itself is beautifully directed by Jill Gevargizian who has an excellent eye.
The Prom (2020)
Jazzy Musical
Movie musicals are normally a mixed bag. Even the good ones can be polarizing and characters bursting into song can sometimes be a hard sell to modern audiences who expect gritty realism. The Prom embraces the format completely with some mixed, but mostly positive results.
After their latest show bombs, two self-obsessed Broadway actors recruit two of their out of work friends to get some much needed positive press by crashing into a small town to teach the yokels a thing or two about tolerance after a lesbian high schooler isn't allowed to take her girlfriend to prom.
It could be said that The Prom is a little over directed. Some musical numbers work wonderfully and others seem to be edited to have a cut every 5 seconds to either keep the audience awake or distract from some less than stellar footwork from the Hollywood actors coming into the musical world. These choices can be distracting, but everyone involved in so joyful and game to entertain that it becomes a slight weakness rather than a huge drawback.
Armed with a wonderful cast, director Ryan Murphy pulls every laugh and tear he can from the material even if certain moments can get a little too sweet and sugary for its own good. The 2nd half has the tendency to drag a little bit more than the first, but all in all, The Prom is a delicious confection that had me smiling from ear to ear.
Frightmare (1974)
Deranged British Thriller
No one who looks like Sheila Keith should seem threatening, but after Frightmare, you might have second thoughts every time you pass by a kindly looking elderly woman. This is what Frightmare does best. It takes the happy and mundane and flips it, turning it into the stuff of nightmares.
A young woman has been having issues with her younger sister who she's been caring for ever since her parents ended up in prison for murdering and devouring several people. Once they're released, her entire world falls to pieces as it becomes clear that her father might be bringing victims to their home to quench his wife's ghoulish appetite.
Frightmare might not be a high point of cinematic style, but the story it wishes to tell is a great one and it's incredibly well acted and the pacing moves very well, especially once things start escalating. The ending is one you're not likely to forget for quite a while.
Director Pete Walker made his masterpiece with Frightmare and it's hard to figure out why he's not better regarded among other horror masters. His output might be a little uneven, but you could say the same thing about many other, better known horror filmmakers.
M.D.C. - Maschera di cera (1997)
House of Wax Italian Style
If you ever wondered what House of Wax would look like reimagined as an Italian giallo, you're in luck, because The Wax Mask is exactly that. Sure, there are a few liberties taken here and there, but it's still eerily similar.
A young woman sees her family murdered and, years later, she begins working for a wax museum where there's a set piece that looks an uncanny amount like the crime scene from her childhood. She begins to piece together that the wax exhibits are more than simple sculptures and might have real people underneath them.
As in most Italian films, the dialogue doesn't always translate well to English and there are some sacrifices of logic for cool set pieces, but it's typically an enjoyable ride.
Director Sergio Stivaletti gets to have a great time with The Wax Mask. This film has some great camera work and a few great set pieces. It's never quite to the level of Argento, Bava, or Fulci, but it's far from workmanlike. The gore effects are strong and nasty, but the film does seem to go on and on at times and could benefit from a few minutes being shaved off.
The House on Sorority Row (1982)
Beware The Murky Swimming Pool!
Do pranks every go right in slasher movies? They always seem to leave someone injured, traumatized enough to turn into a murderer, or stone cold dead. In that grand tradition, The House on Sorority Row presents this well worn chestnut, but it's served up with a reasonable amount of style and even class.
The graduating class of a college sorority has had it up to here with their bossy and moody housemother, Mrs. Slater, after she says that they will not be throwing a graduation party at the sorority house. To get back at her, they devise a prank to scare her into letting them go ahead with the party, but it backfires when the blanks they loaded the gun with turn out to be real and, now, they have a dead housemother in their muddy, unused swimming pool. They go ahead with the party and keep trying to keep people away from the pool as someone starts killing them off one by one.
The House on Sorority Row feels more polished both in terms of script and production values than just about any other slasher film of its time. There's some gore, but it's a mostly restrained affair with only a few notable blood-soaked set pieces. Each of the sorority girls has their own personality, which makes it easy to tell them apart and most of the performances are better than what you'd usually find in a film of this type. Eileen Davidson really shines as the queen bee and Richard Band's lush, orchestral score sets a nice mood.
Antropophagus (1980)
Gory, But Not Very Interesting
A lot has been said about Anthrophagus' excellent special effects and for good reason. The film comes to life when it's showcasing decapitated heads in buckets or scalps being ripped off. When it's just following around our cardboard characters, it suffers and can't muster any suspense or even decent character drama to keep us invested until the next inevitably gruesome death sequence.
The silly music score doesn't help much in conjuring a mood or sense of dread and, in fact, the U.S. version (under the title The Grim Reaper) has a much more effective score that uses various library cues. I'd recommend on the U.S. cut if it weren't for a lot of the special effects being trimmed (including the infamous fetus eating scene).
If you're only here for the guts, Anthrophagus is worth your time, but if you want a little more substance, look elsewhere.
To All a Goodnight (1980)
Watchable Christmas Slash Fest
David Hess (Krug from Last House on the Left) tries his hand at directing in this mixed bag of a slasher film. After a hilariously quick and abrupt prologue, we're introduced to a group of sorority girls who are staying behind for Christmas break for a variety of reasons. A crazed Santa Claus-dressed killer has joined the festivities and he or she is out for blood. But why?
Most of the characters are interchangeable, the dialogue isn't great, and it's about as scary as a rerun of Columbo, but there's something charming about the whole thing. There are poorly executed day for night shots galore, some gore, and a few spirited performances to keep things afloat. Just try not to chuckle when a middle aged matron comes in and reveals she's probably dying of a disease and is never seen or heard from again. The ending is odd, too.
There are better Christmas slashers, but also far worse, so you might as well give it a shot if you like these kinds of movies.
Halloween: Resurrection (2002)
Obscenely Idiotic
The Halloween franchise has never been a big stickler for continuity or quality, but the series hits an all time low with this entry. Poor Jamie Lee Curtis is reduced to a lousy opening cameo that makes absolutely no sense while sporting a long fright wig. As awful and nonsensical as that opening is, it's the high point of the film.
Michael returns home and is understandably upset that the cast and crew of a webcam reality show has set up shop in his old stomping grounds. Naturally, he begins to pick them off one by one (and sometimes two by two), but don't worry - you won't have to sit through any of that awful suspense or those pesky scares. Halloween: Resurrection feels like a classic case of film by commitee. There's no passion whatsoever.
The best thing one could say is that Tyra Banks doesn't embarrass herself and some of Danny Lux's music cues (including his takes on Carpenter's original score) are pretty decent.
Halloween (2018)
Unexciting Reboot
To me, it seems like, if you're going to complete reboot a series, you need to have a good reason to do so. The creators of this new Halloween don't have that and the film suffers because of it. There's no reason for this film to exist. I'm not the world's biggest fan of the Halloween franchise and the idea of picking up after the original film is a great idea. The brother/sister/family angle always rang false and I certainly don't mind them doing away with it, but this film gives us no interesting or exciting reasons for revisiting these characters.
Thematically, it shares many plot points with Halloween: H20, but glazes over a lot of the more potentially interesting aspects to turn Laurie Strode into your average Linda Hamilton inspired action heroine.
The new batch of characters we've been given range from startlingly unlikable to wallflowers who blend in with the scenery. There's hardly any effort to build suspense or deliver scares either. At least the John Carpenter score is solid.
What Lies Beneath (2000)
A Positively Perfect Thriller
What Lies Beneath would appear to be your average, run of the miller Hollywood pot boiler, but there's so much love and care put into it that it rises above the crap and becomes something quite wonderful.
It helps that Robert Zemeckis directs the film like Hitchcock on crack and Harrison Ford and Michelle Pfieffer commit to their roles 110%. Clark Gregg's screenplay is filled with twists, turns, false starts, side plots, and tons of intrigue.
It's hard to describe What Lies Beneath without giving away huge spoilers, so it's best to go in cold. However, I can say that there ARE ghosts, they ARE angry, and you WILL probably pee yourself a few times. Not only does What Lies Beneath ratchet up the suspense, but it also delivers honest-to-God jump-out-of-your-seat scares.
Stop reading this right now and check it out. It's one of the best thrillers/horror films of the past 20 years.
The Dorm That Dripped Blood (1982)
Darker Than Usual Slasher
The Dorm That Dripped Blood has a chip on its shoulder. A big one! If you're looking for your run of the mill "tits and blood" slasher, this might not be the one for you. It's darkly lit, creepy, and the film stock is grainy, making it feel more like Texas Chainsaw Massacre or Last House on the Left than a Friday the 13th sequel.
The story is nothing special. A group of college students (some of whom look a bit too long in the tooth to be college kids) stay over a holiday break to take inventory in an old dorm and are stalked and killed by someone who will be revealed during the shocking climax.
The cast is decent if a bit dull, but they do a decent enough job and there's not a lot of suspense or scares, but The Dorm That Dripped Blood stands out from the pack by the sheer mean spiritedness of its death scenes and unpredictable kill order. It doesn't play nice or by the rules and there's something sort of exciting about that. The ending is an especially shocking downer.
It's also the feature film debut of Daphne Zuniga, so that's kinda neat. She doesn't have much screen time, but she does a decent job and is featured in one of the wildest and most mean spirited moments of the film.
The Dorm That Dripped Blood might not be a genius work of art, but it has enough interesting moments to make it worth a watch.
Inside (2016)
Passionless and Dull Remake!
Much like the equally inept Martyrs remake, Inside is a useless and boring excuse for a remake. There are a few interesting ideas that never quite pan out, the film is far less vicious and bloody, and the acting is remarkably inept. It's mostly a suspense-free mess.
A pregnant woman survives a car crash which leaves her deaf in one ear and without a husband. On Christmas Eve, a mysterious woman breaks into her home, hellbent on taking her baby for herself.
It's a simple premise that was executed with vicious aplomb in the original French film. Not that the original was without fault - characters make dumb decisions and a few moments genuinely make no sense. A remake could have been a great chance to expand upon the original and correct a few of the original film's issues. Instead, we get a bland, Disney Channel version of the original without any of the terror or suspense of the original.
Inside has been watered down so much from its source material that, at times, it truly does feel like an uninspired TV movie. It doesn't help that the two lead actresses (who are usually quite competent) are sleepwalking through their performances. It's painfully obvious that they're only there for the paycheck.
There are a few amusing additions, such as the heroine being deaf in one ear after the accident and two friendly gay neighbors next door (which leads to a nice Rear Window moment), but the pedestrian acting, lack of guts, and lousy feel-good ending destroys any good will the film had accumulated thus far.
Skip it if you value your time and sanity.
Tragedy Girls (2017)
Sassy and Fun Slasher Spoof!
Not since 1996's Scream has a slasher film this been much fun. It's not really tackling new territory here, but everyone involved is clearly having a blast and it's infectious to watch.
Two teenage friends spend their days checking their myriad social media accounts, hoping that they'll soon go viral and become famous. To hurry things along, they kidnap a serial killer and use him as their gateway to fame - staging murders in his name.
It's to the cast's credit that these two young women are, somehow, still appealing given their awful behavior. The films treats them as loveable buffoons you just can't help but sorta like.
Fans of fun, goofy horror-comedies will find a lot to love here.
Blood Rage (1987)
Entertaining Thanksgiving Slasher
For some reason, there aren't all that many Thanksgiving-themed slasher flicks, but Blood Rage will definitely quench one's thirst for a decent one. It's easily the best out of the ones that are available (certainly way better than Home Sweet Home).
The story is full of twists, mistaken identities, drunken mothers, evil twins, and a whole lot of delicious soap operatics sprinkled in between a series of remarkably bloody and brutal murder set pieces. The acting, besides an inspired (and strange) turn by Louise Lasser, is mostly decent if unmemorable. The real star here is the special makeup effects which range from cheesy to disturbingly realistic.
The pacing can drag a bit here and there, but slasher and camp lovers should be more than satisfied with this one. The Arrow Blu-Ray release is the best way to go. The movie has never looked so good (and probably never will.)
WTF! (2017)
Decent Modern Slasher
An OK modern slasher with a few good performances and nice death scenes is hampered by a lousy, useless "twist" ending. Despite this, there are a few fun moments and bitchy one liners. There aren't any scares or suspenseful set pieces to mention and none of the characters ever rise above one dimensional cardboard cut outs.
Despite this, there's still enough in this to give slasher fans a few occasional smiles here and there. It's not bad, but it's nothing to write home about either.
Speech & Debate (2017)
Occasionally Entertaining, But Empty Teen Film
Speech & Debate seems like it wants to go for the jugular and say something profound about small town teen life, but every time it gets close, it chickens out and settles for dull clichés.
The cast certainly seems game. Our three teen leads are appealing, charming, and a joy to watch, but the pedestrian script doesn't do them any favors. It wants to have something to say about gay issues, teen pregnancy, pedophilia, religion, detached parents, and overly moralistic school boards, but it never digs into one of them below the surface and the whole film becomes sort of like a light episode of Glee.
This is not to say that Speech & Debate is without amusing moments, but the laughs aren't big enough to function as a comedy and the drama isn't real or powerful enough to function as a drama. Speech & Debate just sort of...is. In its goal to be inoffensive, light, and watchable for all audiences, it no longer has any bite.
This is a Netflix pick at best.
The Apple (1980)
Bizarre, Infectious Musical
Lokk, I'm not going to sit here and say that The Apple is a good movie. It's not. It makes zero sense. However, it's so much fun that you can't help but fall under its spell.
It's the futuristic year of (gulp) 1994 and everything looks like a bad 80's music video. There's a sweet, folk duo whose bond is about to be tested when one of them sells out for fame and fortune at all costs. There's something about the Adam and Eve story woven through, but it's a little hard to decipher.
Despite a lousy plot, The Apple does boast strong production values and a tuneful, infectious score that you won't be able to get out of your head for...well, forever. It's also the first film of the appealing Catherine Mary Stewart who later went on to films like Night of the Comet and The Last Starfighter.
The recently released Blu-Ray shows the film in all its over the top glory. A must see for camp musical fans.
Stepfather II (1989)
Better Than Usual Sequel
The Stepfather was a surprisingly classy thriller stuck at the end of the 80's slasher glut. Thanks to a smart script and a phenomenal performance from Terry O'Quinn, The Stepfather ended up becoming a cult classic.
Even though it seemed as if O'Quinn's Jerry Blake was killed off at the end of the first film, the magic of the movies brings him back for yet another round of slashings in the sake of the American Dream. Jerry's now stuck in a mental hospital. He, of course, escapes and forms a new identity - this time, a psychiatrist(named Gene) specializing in suburban women, which gives him a nice group of gals to choose from for his next dream wife.
Unfortunately for Carol (the beautiful Meg Foster), Jerry fixates on her and her son (Jonathan Brandis) and wants them to become his new family. Jerry's soon up to his own tricks, dispatching of anyone that gets in his way.
This is a movie that doesn't need to exist, so it's to director Jeff Burr's credit that he's able to make it seem as if this movie has a right for being here. Bringing Terry O'Quinn back is a huge plus and he's pitch perfect here. Joining him are genre faves Meg Foster and Caroline Williams who are equally game and ground a rather ridiculous story in reality. There's a nice dose of playful, dark humor throughout and the murder set pieces will please gore fiends without turning off those in the mood for more traditional thriller stylings.
Stepfather II might not reinvent the genre, but it's a worthy and fun sequel.
Sole Survivor (1984)
Why Don't More People Talk About This Film?
If slow paced, intelligent horror films along the lines of Let's Scare Jessica to Death or Carnival of Souls are your speed, you'll find a lot to love in Sole Survivor.
Predating Final Destination by nearly 20 years, Sole Survivor tells the story of Denise, a TV producer, who ends up being the sole survivor of a plane crash. Soon after, she starts seeing people following her and, well,...I don't want to spoil anything else.
Sole Survivor is a perfect example of "less is more." Things are never quite clear or explained, which makes the entire film quite mysterious and creepy. Most of the performances are subdued and natural and a large cloud of doom hangs over the entire film. It's impressively creepy, honestly.
If you're a gore hound or looking for cheap jump scares, Sole Survivor might not be your cup of tea, but those who appreciate a nice slow burn will probably love it.
Slaughter High (1986)
Campy and fun slash 'em up
Slaughter High will never win points for originality, characterization, acting, or really anything that makes a so-called "great film", but if you turn off your brain for 90 minutes, you'll find a lot to like.
The plot is your typical "abused teenager stages fake high school reunion to lure his classmates into a death trap" kinda thing, but the death scenes are surprisingly creative and delivered with a certain amount of panache. The FX work happens to be rather solid, the atmosphere of the deserted school is on point, and there are several amusing performances to enjoy.
Oh, did I forget to mention that everyone in this film is at least 10-15 years too old for their roles? Hell, Caroline Munro was pushing 40 by this point. These have to be some of the oldest looking high schoolers I've ever seen.
Despite its goofy premise and performances, there's an aura of mean spiritedness that hangs over the film like a dark cloud, which helps give birth to some spooky and haunting moments here and there.
Slasher and b-movie fans will find a lot to love.
Hospital Massacre (1981)
Way More Fun Than You'd Think
Hospital Massacre a.k.a. X-Ray is a light, goofy slasher offering that's not discussed or mentioned very often, even though it's probably one of the more fun examples of the genre.
Barbi Benton stars as a recently divorced woman trying to pick up some routine x-rays from the hospital. Her x-rays are switched by a psychotic madman and Benton's night turns into a full fledged nightmare.
If there's one thing Hospital Massacre can be commended for, it's the wackiness factor. Benton encounters everything in this hospital from an entire floor filled with smoke and guys in gas masks, cackling old crones, decapitated heads in hat boxes, sinks full of acid, rooms of shrieking patients in full body casts...it boggles the mind. It teeters the line of camp several times, but usually just comes across as nightmarish and bizarre.
Benton isn't too bad as our heroine and the rest of the acting isn't awful either. The smokey hospital (is it on fire?) adds some nice atmosphere and our heroine's predicament is nicely paranoid like dime store Kafka.
Slasher fans should find a lot to enjoy here.
The Burning (1981)
A near-perfect slasher film
Whenever someone asks me to recommend them a slasher film, The Burning is always at the top of the list. Not only does it feature a recognizable cast of up and coming soon-to-be-stars, but it has career-best work by makeup artist Tom Savini, a wicked score by Rick Wakeman, and an impressive series of set pieces.
The plot is your usual summer camp slash 'n dash stuff - a camp caretaker is left horribly burned after a prank goes wrong and, years later, he returns to make sure all the kids at Camp Blackfoot have as bad a time as he did.
Let's face it, that's not exactly reinventing the wheel, but there's a lot to recommend her. Almost all the death scenes pack a nasty punch, the characters are semi-interesting, and there's a good deal of atmosphere. The Burning is one to proudly put next to Friday the 13th and Sleepaway Camp in your "summer camp horror" collection.
The Prowler (1981)
Great Special Effects Can't Save A Tedious Mid-Section
I'll get this off my chest - the first 30 minutes of The Prowler are basically slasher heaven. I really mean that. The atmosphere is there, the characters aren't that bad, the killer is imposing, the kills are brutal and nasty...but then...(sigh) things just fall apart and don't get semi-exciting again until the last 10 minutes.
The Prowler might be so wonderful in its first act, because it starts off like most slasher flicks end. By the time its first act has wrapped up, it seems as if already a half-dozen people have been offed and our Final Girl to be has already had a fairly exciting chase sequence.
Sounds great, right? It is. But then she's saved and the rest of the film is spent with her and a policeman doing Scooby Doo-esque detective work in old houses with flashlights with brief interludes of death scenes during a graduation party. It just stops everything in its tracks.
This is not to say that The Prowler is a bad movie. Far from it. It just needed something more exciting and urgent in it's middle section to keep the audience interesting. One never feels like the two leads are in any danger and that drag it down. Still, the special effects steal the show and are wonderful.
Blessed Are the Children (2016)
I Haven't Been Able To Get This Out of My Head
I saw Blessed Are the Children at a local film festival a little while back and followed the film's page on Facebook soon after. A post a few weeks ago got me thinking about the film all over again and how much I enjoyed it. I guess it haunted me more than I realized.
Blessed tells the story of a young woman who's having an awful year, made even worse when she realizes she's pregnant. She decides she doesn't want to keep the baby, goes in for the abortion, and then finds herself stalked by creepy anti-abortion protesters in baby masks.
This could have been a run-of-the-mill slasher, but there's enough talent in front of and behind the camera to give it a certain gravitas most films of this type simply don't have. It's definitely low-budget (apparently shot for $1,000?), but it certainly doesn't feel amateur. For instance, the three female leads are perhaps some of the best written and acted horror film characters I've seen in a while. They're realistic, smart, funny, and wonderfully flawed as well. You can tell the creative team really loved these women.
Some might find the film a bit slow, but I was never bored. There's not any bloodshed until about 30-40 minutes into the film, but after that point, it rarely slows down again. I went in thinking that I'd know who'd live and who'd die, but by the last act, it really became a free for all and I found myself wonderfully surprised and thrown off guard on several occasions. The final shot is especially haunting and gasp-inducing.
As of now, this movie is, I guess, just playing festivals, but if it comes to one near you, check it out. I'm hoping it's released on DVD soon. It's one that'll stick with you.
Tourist Trap (1979)
Fascinating low-budget nightmare
After many of my friends recommended this to me, I figured I had to check it out, so I bought the (relatively) new Blu-Ray release, settled in for the night, and checked it out. To my surprise, Tourist Trap lives up to its hype and then some. One can see why it never became a huge mainstream success like, say, Jaws or Halloween, but it has all the makings of a cult classic.
The set up is nothing spectacular. In fact, it owes a lot of its plot to The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Psycho, and House of Wax (even more surprising, the 2005 remake of that film is more of a remake of Tourist Trap than the '53 film). What makes this one stand out from the then growing slasher genre is a sense of the surreal, the dreamlike, and the nightmarish. Attractive teens aren't just killed one by one by some creep in a mask. There's a lot more at play here than your average stalk 'n slash flick. By the last 20 minutes of the film, everything seems like a bizarre fever dream and hope is a thing of the past.
A lot should be said for Jocelyn Jones' wonderful performance - going from kind wallflower to woman in the process of a nervous breakdown. Chuck Connors is also terrific as Mr. Slausen, the owner of the titular Tourist Trap whose motives seem to always be up in the air. And yes, that's future Charlie's Angel, Tanya Roberts, as one of the other victims.
For those looking for something creepy and different, Tourist Trap delivers in spades. Perfect for a Halloween party or even for a kid's first horror film (it is rated PG after all).