Change Your Image
forrest-pugh
Reviews
The Head Hunter (2018)
The Dragonborn goes on a side quest
I liked quite a lot about this low budget film project. Is it a great movie? No. But I do like the theme, effects, and cinematography.
Essentially you get to watch a Skyrim side quest: What happens when one of Kynareth's beasties kills the Dragonborn's adopted daughter - perhaps it's Dagny's long lost sister.
After spending some time boosting his alchemy skill he goes hunting everything from Cyrodillic goblins to feral werewolves that would cause the Silver Hand to tremble, and then some trolls somewhere between Morthall and the Rift. Sometimes he gets bounties from the hold guards of the Pale, but usually he just shoots an enchanted arrow and trusts it to guide him.
Eventually he collects enough trophies to complete the main part of the side quest, before tracking down some pesky Duergar in Chillwind Depths. One of them happens to be the revived corpse of his daughter and he must fight it and kill it (again).
Then he brings it back home to his cabin and prepares it for reburial before setting out again to track the next bounty. But - he has been learning alchemy from Namira and Peryite and the joke is on him.
Video game subquest plot aside it is very visually compelling, and obviously made with a great deal of passion. The make up, effects, and costumes are top-notch. The dialog was much MUCH better than most modern high budget movies.
Incidentally - for this build the Dragonborn appears to have gone with the light dragonscale armor ensamble, and wields a variety of one handed axes as a main weapon choice. He does wield an imperial style longsword, and several bows. Overall this does not represent the best attention to skill synergies.
Dune: Part Two (2024)
More of the same - when will it be over?
Visualy and artistically it is once again a top notch production. But the flawed characteristics of the first film are magnified here. The story becomes very choppy and tries to tell a story about a boy and his equally strong mate when this is almost contrary to the source material.
I have to compare this to the 1984 adaptation by David Lynch as well as the Sci-Fi TV Movie series. The 1984 was a very artistically stylized cliff notes version of the book. David Lynch did a great job of keeping the lean bits consistent, true to the story, and consistent. He didn't deviate from the main themes, and while a bit wierd visually - was still quite good for the time.
The Sci-Fi series did an amazing job of telling the story in it's full complexity. It's main failure was the limited budget which resulted in some very 'unique' costume choices, as well as the reuse of stock footage for the battle scenes.
This Dune meanders through the details while skipping around the meaningful plot structure that make them important. And that is this: The movie is specifically about Paul Muad'dib Atreidies becoming the Kwizats Haddrach - the chosen messiah figure which the Bene Gesserit sisterhood has been persuing for centuries, and a hero of prophecy to the Fremen. Paul's training, natural talents, and super-human abilities are the very backbone of the story. And this is why the Liet Kynes character was meant to be a male. He was woven into this.
In this version that is mostly ignored, and his bratty she-ro counterpart character attempts to constantly upstage him, and never becomes the devoted and beloved Chani of the books and previous movies.
Oh yeah, and there is some fighting and stuff, and the water rituals and what not... But yeah they're just thrown in there and totally not important. And somehow his sister just sort of growns up and says a few words but isn't an important character?
Dune: Part One (2021)
Dissapointing and sort of dreary
So to frame this - I am a big fan of the orignal novels, which are quite honestly incredibly rich and detailed and difficult to adapt to a single movie or even a series. That said there are some very good qualities about this attempt.
First of all it is visually stunning. Villenueve did a great job bringing the visual aspects of this together. The technology, settings, costumes, and such were spot on!
The casting was a mixed bag. Certain characters were modified for what I suppose were diversity and inclusion purposes... which is not a complaint that it wasn't a predominantly white cast. In fact quite contrarilly most of the choices where quite good. The Fremen where well done for the most part. In the novels they are Zensunni, i.e. From southwestern (arab) and east asian extraction, with a smattering of whatever refugee/slaves joined them during the machine crusades to escape the fighting. The Atreidies were well cast as well. In the books they seem to be of a Greek/Southern European extraction, so a dark haired and complected set of actors is appropriate. The Harkonnens... are never really defined in the books as anything other than agressive opponents, but what was done with them in this film was striking and quite effective!
Now there is one character choice that I don't dislike exactly, but it is very contrary to the novels. Liet Kynes is definitely a male in the books, and this is important to the tapestry of the kwizats haddrach which is almost entirely ignored here.
Now, the worst aspect of this film was the storyline. As mentioned, it's quite a challenge to take just the one book as a film, and while Villenueve wanted to do it justice and not see it turn out like the black-licorice-acid-trip that the 1984 piece turned out to be, David Lynch managed to create a more or less comprehensive cliff-note version of the story that was consistent and true to the source.
This film does not do that well, but instead spastically throws in morsels that the other films left out without placing them in any meaningful context.
Also - their eyes aren't blue!
Bandit: Bandit Goes Country (1994)
MADE FOR TV Adaptation
I picked this up on an 8 movie bargain DVD film collection. It stood out right away as obviously a made-for-Television film. It wasn't all that bad for that class of film.
If you realize this up front and don't try and compare it to the original films you won't be dissapointed so much.
That said, the writing isn't quite there and it tries to cram in as many 'country folk' tropes just shy of incest jokes as it can. The acting is actually decent for what there is to work with. The dialogue isn't aweful and the sequences actually fit together decently well. It's not as chock-full of car and truck action as a full budget movie would be, but it is for the most part watchable... at least once.
Watch it or don't - just don't think of it as a part of the Smokey legacy.
Heavy Metal (1981)
An aged classic - more cheese than wine - still good
I still love this movie, despite its flaws. That being said - the movie is named after an adult comic magazine that featured strips of a nature not necessarilly suiteable for children, and not a genre of music.
The magazine is sort of like a sci-fi/fantasy catalog of comic strips and short stories - showcasing different artists with each edition. The collection is a hodge-podge of material - sometimes collected by theme, other times simply collected together from what was submitted(?) that month. No two users will appreciate each issue the same way.
That said - this movie is an attempt to capture an episode of that magazine in an anthology format. Bear in mind that this is a late 1970's movie so the the content includes themes that may not meet today's more prude sensibilites, and the animation quality is quite different... while it probably looked good on a tube-TV set from the era, today's ultra-high definition sets will definitely show its age.
As some other reviewers mention - there is a hit-and-miss quality to the stories. For a magazine that can work, but in the movie - especially one strung together in an anthology format - there should probably have been a bit more consideration given to how the different sequences related to each other.
Fire and Ice (1983)
ALMOST a great film
The reviews by users criticizing the story line and character development are entirely fair, though their individual rating of the film are entirely subject to personal taste.
As is mine: This is a great take on the sword and sorcery genre. The film builds a fairly believable other-time-and-place sort of world that combines favorite elements in what seems like something of an art-house style film. By that I mean that there are quite a few great elements presented, but not necessarilly in a fully finished fashion. The viewer is left with plenty of place to fill in their own blanks. Sometimes this works and sometimes it doesn't. In this case I really enjoy it - it teases a world that I want to explore more of.
The characters are entirely stereotypical. A blond muscular hero fights hordes of baddies to save a beautiful, voluptuous, and scantilly clad princess from and villainous edgelord who wants to take over the world. Along the way he picks up a side-kick/mentor; a masked vigilante hunter who guides and assists him to his goal.
The story is simple and straight forward, but it doesn't really need to be nuanced or complicated... not everything needs to be based on a soap opera styled drama. There are some places where you could ask "Why?". Why is the princess fleeing in the first place? Why is edgelord trying to take over the world? Why are the good humans encamped at the calving face of a glacer? Or you could just ignore that and watch the story unfold. Appparently this is based on a comic so continuity from scene to scene is not guarenteed in the source material.
Yet this film is a source of inspiration to many that came after it. It is certainly worth a place in a collection, though not perhaps the centerpiece.
John Wick: Chapter 2 (2017)
It's the first film again, but both more and less so.
John Wick two wastes no times and gives no forks at all about dropping you into the middle of the action. A classic car is destroyed, Russian mobster baddies are exterminated and Mr. Wick gets a few scrapes.
Then the movie takes a turn for the worse and wastes time actually attempting to sneak a plot into it which is barely worthy of a typical video game. The characters are artificially colorful and horribly cliched versions of the edgelord stereotypes you would find at the mall in the 90s hanging out between Spencers, Hot Topix, and the collector Sword shop.
And somehow they are all part of this great big international assassin's club which has it's own armory, hotel/club, and fashion botique/gun shop. I could almost smell the Drakkar Noir and Hopps 9 oozing out of my television set.
Fortunately you can ignore this pretentious nonsense as Mr. Wick gets right back down to business wiping these badies out left and right. It is once again spectacular if uninspired. I recommend AND enjoyed this flick.
John Wick (2014)
As good as advertised
This movie doesn't waste time on stupid trivial filler such as storyline or dramatic plot. No, it plays to its one strength and it does this very well and relentlessly. Non-stop gunfu action.
The movie is a graphic display of Mr. Reeves' intense training and time spent becoming a martial arts expert and marksman. I think this feat is actually more impressive than the film itself, and videos of his training truly made me appreciate the cinematic expose far more than if I had just watched the movie.
There are some standard tropes - Russian mobsters and a guild of assassins. The rest is all a gun-play fuled revenge fantasy where John Wick becomes an unstoppable juggernaught of fury murdering the ever-loving snot out of each and every Russian Mafia lacky on screen for the next 80 or 90 minutes.
It is glorious mindless violence and noise. It does this very well, and I recommend this movie for anyone's viewing pleasure.
Im Westen nichts Neues (2022)
Not quite a perfect movie
This is an interpretation of the novel rather than an adaption of it. Let's start with that and the understanding that it is attempting to frame the original work along side some modern context that doesn't quite translate. Specifically - the novel deals in more depth with the blind patriotism and propaganda that went into the war movement.
The modern version of the film pays homage to this but it is never fully developed and as if it were abandoned on the cutting room floor along with the portrayal of the warmongering commander. These were much better portrayed in the novel and perhaps in earlier films. The choice to portray the self-ending of one of the friends in a graphic and dramatic way while leaving out some key scenes such as the gas attacks was a bit off the mark too.
However the modern version has more immersive visual effects and does a satisfactory job of conveying the personal trauma and conflict that Paul goes through in his journey from fresh-faced young man eager to serve the Fatherland to sub-human warrior/animal at the end of the film.
It is not a bad film at all, and those who are not familiar with or will never read the novel will get quite a bit out of it. But it could have gone into a bit more depth (as the novel did) in portraying the true character of the inept warmongering commanders who condemned so many men to their deaths in the Great War as well as the nationalist jingo that so many civilians were caught up with.
There are definitely modern events for which this could have portrayed some historic parallels in a much better fashion.
Terminus (1987)
For die hard fans of the specific niche
If you love the semi-post-apocalyptic car warrior movies then this one isn't off the mark. It's got a bit of cheesiness to it but the main plotline is on the mark, and the surrounding story and action fit the theme just fine.
On the other hand if you love Rifftrax/MST3K then this is a film that is basically written just for that genre.
Either way it's campy and fantastically so. No - it's not "good" in any normal sense of the word, but it is definitely in the so-bad-it's-good camp of campy movies.
The set work and costumes are probably the most professional part of this work. They were right on target for this theme... except maybe for the main bad-guy who seemed to have no connection to the actual plot but had very strong transvestite Ronald Macdonal vibes, and the talking truck... not really spoilers - just watch the thing and see for yourself.
There are definitely things to criticize: The supporting actors all appear to have recieved their lines only the morning of their shoot, and the writing for the main characters and their character names were apparently penciled in the day before. However, the main actors forge on and do their best, although the editing cuts the scenes together in such an discordinate way that even their amazing acting powers dcannot save the film.
Beach Babes from Beyond (1993)
Exactly what you should expect from the genera
This movie isn't deep, or well written, or technically amazing. It's not really sci-fi, or comedy. It's jam packed with 'A'-list star's relatives.
But you aren't watching this movie for any of that. You are watching this movie to see moderately attractive women in skimpy clothing pretending to act before they tragically loose their attire and find themselves somehow having sex with some random surfer dude.
The sex scenes aren't great - this isn't porn after all. These are really the worst part of the film as they are totally disconected from everything else and since it's softcore you end up watching several 5 minute interludes of oiled up naked people engaged in foreplay/simulated sex with lighting and sets provided by the local Glamour Shots at the mall.
There is full nudity and plenty of breasts, both fake and real. A vague plot loosely ties this all together so you can pretend you are getting a genuine movie experience. Overall this film delivers everything an example of this genere should. It *could* be better in some ways, but could certainly be much worse.
Journey to the Center of the Earth (1988)
Hot Garbage in Celluloid 80's style
I don't even know where to start with this disaster. After reading that it wasn't even the fim the director/screen-play writer intended, but a grafted sequel to the nearly as horrible "Alien from LA" it makes a bit of sense how this film came to be.
Yet as a piece of cinematic work it makes absolutely no sense. It's as if a film-school group got an assignment and each did their own thing without consulting the others. There was obviously some budget for this - like maybe enough to do a SciFi movie on the BBC or some young adult movie network. The sets aren't necessarilly good, but they are obviously done with great effort and at least moderate expense. The costumes are also done up as though someone was trying to make a decent movie even if the overall visual appeal is... questionable. However the actors are definitely from the bargain bin. I'm not sure if it's quite their fault, or simply bad material... but the characters stink on ice.
It's truly not a good movie. It could be a 'so-bad-it's-good' film for some; but most are going to get more value and entertainment out of things like laundry, or doing dishes, or mowing the lawn for an equivalent amout of time. I'm not sure if you could even make a decent drinking game out of it... just drink and skip the film maybe.
The Deep Ones (2020)
Tits and Tentacles
There's tentacles which is Lovecraftian, and there are a few references to the Cuthulu mythos thrown in for flavor... but it isn't really related to the titular work otherwise.
There's nudity and sex within the first 15 min, and then it just sort of slows down and... somehow the fairly amatur acting hypnotizes you into thinking it's a wierd cult movie that might go somewhere - Eyes Wide Shut style maybe. But it doesn't.
It kind of sort of could work as a modern Lovecraftesque story, but the combination of lower budget for acting and effects just doesn't cut it. The rewrite shows an appreciation for but not a deep understanding of the Cuthulu mythos.
It's like someone filmed a Cuthulu live-action-role-play group meeting and paid for professional editing work. Or perhaps something a friend might make as a hobby and you watch it to be supportive.
The movie is not terrible, but it's not really good either. I think the people giving it high ratings must be personal friends of the producers or directors or something.
An American Carol (2008)
Zucker Nails It
Back when we still had the great Leslie Nielson, and Gary Coleman - Zucker made a fantastic movie that resonates even today.
In fact this movie is jam-packed with star power taking swipes at the left and the right. And heck - if they couldn't get the original lefty-loon to play their eponymous role they got a great re-enactor to step in for them.
Sure liberals and millennials will probably chock on it - but they're sub-humans anyway, so screw 'em.
This lambasts every trope of the modern left with humor and gusto. And yes - the schnozberry kid from Super Troopers is great here too.
Enjoy this great bit of parody and if you don't - maybe you should Afghanistan or Cuba or something.
The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power (2022)
They obviously spent millions
...and that was all on the eye-candy.
The writing, pacing, and dialogue are just not up to par. The performances remind me of 1990's BBC productions, or possibly mid 2000's SciFi original shows of the 'B' grade variety.
To be frank - the 3-5 min episode re-caps convey everything you need to know about the whole hour episode. The rest is over-dramatic face shots and mindless filler dialogue. I feel like I'm watching an Instagram glamor-shot montage interspersed and knitted together with bad fan fiction.
All that tripe spiced up with absolutely fantastic effects and prop shots. And let's go there - because there is some absolutely WONDERFUL artistry in the visuals for this. The set and prop work is absolutely fantastic. The costumes and weapons and furniture pieces are wonderfully done with obvious care and great artistry.
I think the set and prop artists should be rightly proud of what they did here, while the writers need to be sacked and drummed out of show business. The actors - well they seem to be making the best of what they have to work with.
I'll try and make an honest effort to get through the 3rd episode but I'm not very impressed yet.
Shrek Forever After (2010)
total phone-in and unpleasant distortion of what was a happy feel-good series
Its darker, poorly written, and feels like the best they could do was rip off other films' scenes. Music patches over the plotholes distracting you in an attempt to forget nothing is going on. The jokes are poorly timed, and as a result far to cliched and unfunny.
Dune (2000)
A very well done Dune adaptation
This movie impressed me very much. I've read many of the books and had just completed a reading of the prequel stories. This adaptation does a fantastic job of tying those together, and goes beyond the original film's scope. The feel is much more authentic and true to the stories. It's hard to cram that much story into 2-3 hours of movie, so there are definitely some pieces missing.
This is not a perfect move of course; it has some repeated use of CGI/Stock Footage that is telling of it's T.V. movie budget.
Some of the acting is lack-luster at times. At the time I didn't recognize anyone but William Hurt. Without exposure I didn't have any preconceived expectations for any of them, so I wasn't disappointment.
I happen to own a physical copy of this version (Director's cut), and not the 1984 film; just to be clear about which I preferred. We'll see what the 2020 movie has to offer in comparison. Based on the trailers it looks like it took quite a bit of the visual inspiration from THIS film.
The Willoughbys (2020)
Blech
Every insipid modern politically correct stereotype unabashedly smeared across a colorful 3D animated world. Animation is decent, the story is dumb. I gave it 45 min or so before I tapped out.
Deep (2017)
It's completely stupid.
There's not much to spoil here - this flop of a film spoils itself.
Other reviews have gone into some of the factual fallacies, while others accurately portray the lack of plot, character depth, etc.
I watched this with the kids and realized that this going on my no-watch list for the portrayal of the 'hero' character with a very bad and disrespectful attitude... even in his saving moment he 'never listened to grandpa before, why start now?'. Apparently having learned nothing from his "quest". Other "heroic" traits portrayed: Cowardice, sarcasm, psychopathy, betrayal, thoughtlessness... Not good characteristics for children to emulate.
Just to point out a few other factual misses:
* Ice floats - so the freeze guns used by the bad guys worked all wrong.
* Melting ALL the ice on the planet would raise the sea level, sure, but only about 1/3 - 1/2 way up the taller buildings of NY.
* If there was an ice-age to follow this would LOWER the sea level significantly
* Electric lights generally wouldn't work underwater.
* Bio-luminescence is a CHEMICAL reaction and in no-way confers any sort of kind of electro-proofing.