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chrissage
Reviews
Boca (1994)
like having teeth pulled
oh dear. waves of kids being murdered in favellas in rio de janeiro. an interesting, if disturbing topic. who is responsible? enter rae dawn chong, beautiful but somewhat limited actress (see Commando) and one of the Kemp brothers (of the hallowed thespian soap opera school of acting) Add revered (reviled?) soft porn director Zalman King and the result is an excuse of a film that doesn't really work on any level. The directing credit is actually shared between King and one Walter Avancini, and the difference in opinion they must have had is obvious as the film changes direction frequently, unsure of it's path. the flashbacks are repetitive and irritating, the voodoo sub-plot ridiculous, the characters either too sleazy for words or just plain awful.If you want to see Chong naked this will(maybe)satisfy you, but at what price? There probably IS a good movie to be made on this subject matter, but Boca isn't it.
The Wrong Man (1993)
barely watchable (sic)
...........This contains a spoiler or two................. Alex, a mug on the run, is duped by Felix and finds himself wanted for murder, again. to escape the law he climbs into Arquettes cleavage, sorry, make that convertible, and along with her very annoying husband Lithgow, hits the road. this movie seems to be nothing more than a vehicle for Miss Arquette to parade her body and considerable charms at every opportunity. Lithgow is awful - just plain unbelievable with the mood swings of a metronome. Alex is one dimensional and as blank as his suit. his vision does not extend beyond the end of his nose, or Miss Arquette's cleavage, whichever is closer at the time. for all that, it is strangely watchable until the end, which is laughably so. the getaway vehicle is a train pulling out of the station with the speed of the road roller in Austin Powers. three old ladies with zimmer frames would have time to get on or off without breaking sweat, let alone a limb. yet to the mexican police it is a challenge. ludicrously funny.
I Want You (1998)
so what movie did you see?
i read all the imdb comments on this movie and looked forward to watching it, enjoying a cerebral flick as much, if not more than the next man. but what a disappointment... the mute 'hero' anywhere else would be just a perverted voyeur. his sister is talented but a tramp. the hairdresser is a prick-tease and her ex-boyfriend is a loser. but who cares? there is nothing here to endear the viewer to anybody. the flesh on display was quite prolific, but gratuitous and not particularly attractive either. i found myself wondering what Rachel Weisz was doing in this film, but the over-riding question was why i had continued watching till the end.
Undertow (1996)
dull and contrived
just below the surface lies what? a simply awful movie is what.
as other viewers have justifiably commented, the storm sequences are just plain ridiculous. chopping already sodden firewood in the pouring rain? now that's smart. menace? foreboding? sexual tension? for those read dull & contrived, dull & contrived and dull & overly contrived.
i want to say thank god for mia sara's shower scene but in retrospect i think the producers of the film, having seen the completed mess realised that they had to put something in to make it half way worthwhile at all. so it just becomes yet another contrivance. do yourself a favour and give this a miss.
29 Palms (2002)
way too contrived...
a kind of numb curiosity kept me watching till the end. there was some truly appalling acting, one or two funny moments, ludicrous shoot-out sequences, annoying repeating flashbacks and a lead character with the personality of a three toed sloth (only less interesting)
there is a vague nod to Tarantino here and Lynch there but overall the plot is just way too contrived for it's own good. coincidence as the driver very quickly gets old.
the burning question in my mind, apart from the obvious 'who put up the money for this?' was........in a place with so little charm, once each person got their hands on the bag, why didn't they just get the hell out of Dodge?