marc_haines

Order of Chaos (2010)

Absolutely useless

This movie -that tries so many times to convey some flatulent, deeper meaning- isn't anything more than a two hour dick measuring contest. Absolutely terrible. I also couldn't figure out why the DVD cover has a picture of moist towelette on it. I couldn't help but wonder if somewhere there is a 25 years old white male, reeking of Axe body wash, drinking Smirnoff Ice, and feverishly taking notes while watching this movie. It's less about being entertainment and more about being an instruction manual for douche bags. Don't let me forget the music! There is a repeating soundtrack throughout the movie, during times that I'm assuming are supposed to be hight tension, which sounds like someone rhythmically beating a file cabinet with a paperweight while someone hit's it with a tambourine on the upbeat. At one point in the movie, the antagonist suggests that the protagonist go to his girlfriend and, "fingerbang her like Lenny Kravitz". Granted, I really don't know much about Lenny Kravitz, but that line just seemed a little bizarre.