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lil_moe
Reviews
Superhero Movie (2008)
Saw it first time 15 years later and it isn't so bad
I think the low rating is reasonable considering the movie was made in 2008. Back then, the market was flooded with parody movies following the success of Scary Movie. Movie history had a lot of parody films but they were usually decent quality and separated by years. Then between 2005-2008 there were at least 15 big parody titles and the genre pretty much became boring and repetitive.
So, I didn't see this movie till the time I wrote this review (2023). I don't think it's any worse than other spoof titles of this era - a plot line that makes fun of all major superhero movies made till that point (mind you this was before Marvel so they really didn't have a lot of source material - only Spider-Man, Batman and X-men). The punchlines aren't always clever and the acting isn't always perfect but this exactly was why other spoof titles of the time were successful.
Overall, I thought this was an entertaining movie. We laughed out loud a few times (particularly Leslie Nielsen's lines and performance).
I think this is worth watching if you're in the mood for a totally stupid parody comedy.
After Life: Episode #1.5 (2019)
What a roller coaster
One minute you are almost in tears feeling really sad for Tony and the next minute we are introduced to a respectable lady who makes pudding and bread from organic, natural components and you are just in stitches with laughter.
I honestly can't remember the last time I watched any movie or tv show that caught me off guard and sent me into pure laughter as this episode did.
Great show and great performances literally by everyone.
Insatiable (2018)
Coulda, woulda, shoulda
My wife and I binge watched this show over a week or so and we had absolutely no expectations going in - we didn't read any reviews or watch any trailers. We simply read the plot line and were in the mood for a light action comedy show.
The first season was pretty good with lots of laughs in almost each episode- and I mean uncontrollable laughing till your stomachs hurts and your covered in tears. The message of the creators seemed to be mixed at times between commenting on the psychology of teens, people with psychological disorders, people struggling with sexual identity and a few other "delicate" issues that require a sensitive touch. All that said, the 1st season was good and very enjoyable.
Now, season 2 felt almost like an entirely new show with the same actors and the general plot line but it turned into a sad teen drama. I realized by episode 6 or 7 that we didn't laugh or even smile once almost the entire second season. I don't mind at all watching serious dramas but when a show promises me comedy and intentionally transforms into something completely different then I'd feel cheated.
Overall, the show is watchable if the viewers are open minded and not easily offended by portraying actions that are taboo but it isn't really a show that I'd recommend.
Bright (2017)
Fine example of why you should ignore ratings
I've been deliberately avoiding watching this movie for 4 years because of the bad reviews but tonight my wife and I decided we were in the mood for an average movie to pass the time and boy oh boy were we surprised.
The movie is way better than ratings and reviews would lead you to think. Mr. Smith did better in other shows and he is a bit of a camera hog but overall the movie was extremely enjoyable and engaging.
I certainly recommend this movie to any viewer who is in the mood for an over-the-edge action superhero/alien flick.
Unsolved Mysteries: Tsunami Spirits (2020)
A review from the only person who liked this episode
I watched almost all the other episodes and I generally liked the show but it really is nothing.to write home about.
However, this episode struck me so deep. Having gone through many reviews I can see that I probably am the only person who felt this way. I paused the episode to search online what the major religion in Japan is and understand more about it (and what they believe).
While I'm certainly monotheistic, I really have no notion what happens after a person dies and whether or not they (or an entity working on their behalf) can reach out to get closure.
Overall, this episode is food for thoughts for any one who is open minded and is willing to think outside of the the traditional religion or anti-religion box.
Pet Sematary (2019)
I see now what the hate is about
This is marked as spoilers but I'll not write any spoilers for any reader who isn't already a Stephen King (SK) fan. If you are not a Stephen King fan, please skip to the last paragraph of the review.
*ONLY SK FANS WITH VERY LITTLE SPOILERS* My wife who didn't see the original hated it. I, a shiny-eyed SK fan who read practically every word that Mr. King wrote and got really scared only from the Pet Semetary book thought that I'm willing to consider a remake especially that I still have to see an adaptation of an SK work that felt like the book. The Mist and 1408 came closer than any others but overall movie makers, even when SK himself wrote the screen script, failed to convey the eerie feeling of the story. I was very pleased with The Mist though to the point of going into new SK adaptations with a clear mind and no expectations.
Pet Semetary for some reason diverted fundamentally from the book and the original. The reason SK chose to kill off Gage rather than Ellie is because the "returned" were primal creatures that had no soul. This movie makers chose to have Ellie as "returned" and basically portray her as a physical demon spawn evil spirit who could talk and interact with people and physically hurt them.
*NON-SK-Fans* Pet Semetary 2019 is basically a monster flick that has very little to do with the original SK story. It's probably not a bad watch if you are not familiar with the original work. It's certainly watchable but it's a not a very scary movie.
3/10 because the acting was decent but the movie wasn't really half as scary as I expected.
The Void (2016)
How is this not a cult classic?
I'll start my review with a short story that inspired me to review the title in the first place. My wife and I are huge movie buffs - we average 2-3 movies daily on workdays and 5-6 movies weekends. I use IMDb to keep track of my history and she uses another platform that offers similar services. We both remember every single movie we have watched and practically when and where we watched it. I might forget some details here and there but my wife will remember and vice versa. This has been our life for the last 10 years or so.
Now, this movie. We watched it on the morning of June 2021 but we kept pausing the movie every 10 minutes to ask each other if we have seen this movie before. We have both had this strong feeling of remembering the plot when it happens but we don't actually remember watching the movie and neither of us has it rated on our movie tracking apps. We could swear that we saw the movie when something happens but we couldn't remember anything happening before it actually happens. Very, very bizarre experience that we've never had.
So, the movie plot revolves around mysterious events in a small town, USA over the course of an evening. A police officer finds someone bleeding on the side of the road and takes to the hospital. In the hospital some of the people start to act crazy and very weird stuff start happening.
This is as much as I can with giving away any spoilers but I can say with faith that this is a movie that has to be watched by all horror movie fans. It's a bit too gory at times and a bit too creepy at other times (guess the movie makers wanted to please all types of horror movie goers) but overall it certainly keeps you on the edge of your seat the entire time wondering what the hell is going on.
Relatively, none of the main characters is a famous actor (which is a huge plus) but the acting is superb. The dialogue and plot are very well made. Best of all, the plot twist is something that I didn't see coming - the movie makers were creative enough to go into a route that's rarely well travelled.
9/10 because I only give 10 to absolute classics that have or will survive the test of time but this is certainly a movie I'd recommend to everyone I know.
The Dead Don't Die (2019)
Zombieland, it's not
I'm really not sure how you can put Steve Buscemi, Bill Murray and the magnificent Tilda Swinton in a movie and it turns out bad but this is exactly what happened here. The movie trailers make it look like a zombie apocalypse comedy but it fails so badly as a comedy and as a serious movie. The plot doesn't make a lot of sense (talking zombies is a new angle but it isn't necessarily a clever or well done twist). The dialogue feels like it was written by someone high on drugs.
Overall, this movie is barely watchable - I managed to get through it but I really wasn't entertained one bit. I'd recommend you take a pass on this.
Sand Castle (2017)
Watch it only if you like Hoult, Cavill or the amazing Marshall-Green
Otherwise, don't.
Another modern war flick riddled with characters that talk and act just every inch as you'd expect them - from other war flicks.
I have a feeling they wanted to make a movie that was both a powerful blockbuster (Cavill as an alpha-type special forces squad leader is certain to draw in the masse) and art house (Hoult as the fragile intelligent boy/man who keeps questioning the army and war).
Throw in a bunch of other characters who fit every war film cliche, dialogue that you'd hear only in movies, military gear and tactics that even I, a civilian with below average interest in military, could tell were fake and violà you have Sand Castle.
It seems the movie makers were trying to push an agenda (war is bad - Iraqis are ungrateful miscreants - G. I. Joes are nothing but potentially unsung heroes thrown into a bad situation and trying to make the best out of it).
I'm all for a good war film and I practically idolize Cavill for his portrayal of the Man of Steel but you seriously have to do better than a beaten run of the mill battlefield comradery story with characters that are paper thin. I expected better from Hoult.
5/10 for decent action scenes and effects.
American Murder: The Family Next Door (2020)
To put it mildly: JARRING
I never heard of this case before. I was simply looking for something half-way decent to watch on a lazy weekend afternoon but boy was I shocked.
The documentary is basically a compilation of real life footage. It starts with the disappearance of Shannan Watts and builds towards exploring all the possibilities and ultimately the truth that finally came out.
I had to pause the movie a couple of times to check if this was re-enactment or actual real footage. The way the movie is made makes it look incredibly like a big budget found-footage mockumentary. I know people these days document everything for Facebook, IG, Twitter, etc. but it's creepy how we learn over the course of 90 minutes almost everything there's to know about the life of a seemingly regular family.
Some of the reviews I read here or in other websites after watching the documentary criticize that the documentary didn't explore certain other angles to this case (Shannon's erratic behavior, the financial strain the family was under) as means of explaining the motive behind the crime. I honestly didn't think this was necessary- the documentary was obviously not trying to figure out the why of the crime. It was just a very well put together narrative of the how and when and who. They left the why the crime was committed as it's probably a much bigger debate than what you can present in 90 minutes.
Overall, this documentary is incredibly well made but, fair warning, it's very bleak and borders on watching a snuff film. You almost certainly wouldn't want to watch this if you have small children and/or have a troubled marriage unless if you're prepared to become paranoid.
If you like a well-made documentary based entirely on found footage, in spite of a very sad and shocking real life crime then this movie is absolutely for you and you will remember it for a very long time as I'm certain I will.
On a side note, if you watched Meghan is Missing and liked it, this documentary is the real life adaptation of that movie.
The Expanse: Home (2017)
You Belong With Me
I haven't written many reviews in my almost 19 years on IMDb but this episode is worth a little review.
This is by far the best TV I've seen in years. I'm a huge GoT and Vikings fan so I'm not a stranger to emotional, shocking endings but by god the makers did it so well in this episode.
The build up to the final scene was steady but you could physically feel the tension escalating. The music, the cinematography and the script were incredibly well done.
And that last seen... I had to repeat it a few times because I would just break down each time.
This is TV at its best. A huge congratulations to the producers. You raised the bar to all TV makers.
Transformers: Age of Extinction (2014)
My favorite transformers so far
First off, I've been a member on IMDb for over 12 years; 16 years if I were to count my years of silent lurking before actually signing up. Second, I'm not a Mark Wahlberg fan. The dude did some good movies but he never struck me as an extraordinary actor and I secretly think he lands many roles based on his looks and his physical appearance (which is deeply admirable, considering his age). I was slightly shocked to see this movie was the lowest rates transformers movie. I'm not particularly a fan of the transformers franchise. I've seen all the previous parts. I watched some of the animated series as a kid but I was never really a fan. Now, the age of extension was pretty much another transformers movie to me when I recorded it off of my premium TV service. Simply, another "eye-candy" saga entry to pass time. However, I was very surprised at how much gripping it was. I definitely found parts of the movie to be dragging but the overall experience was very satisfactory. After going through a dozen of reviews here I'd suggest that you steer away from this movie if you're a hardcore transformers fan. If you are, you will very likely dislike it based on deviation from previous comic book story outline. If you're not too familiar with the transformers comic books and are looking for a serious "eye-candy- action that's way over the top and graphics that leave you gaping at the screen, then you will likely like this movie. Lots of action. Lots of impeccable graphics. Not many half naked Megan Foxes trotting around in halter tops but the story, the acting, the action and the graphics will almost certainly satisfy you immensely.
Nate Bargatze: Full Time Magic (2015)
Pure stand-up comedy
This show aired on my network as the finale of a Comedy Central special series of stand up comedians. By far, Nate Bargatze was the absolute best. His stand-up style might be unappealing to some viewers who prefer the theatrics and antics but Full Time Magic is simply an hour long of old-school CLEAN comedy. His jokes were hilarious but his delivery makes you laugh out loud heartily and even, in a couple of instances, I was in stitches. If you enjoy clean, simple comedy. If you're looking for the run of the mill Comedy Central toilet comedy then you might be bored. Either way, this show is worth the time and I hope I get to see Nate Bargatze in future shows. On a side note, Mr Bargatze could probably use a better agent or publicist or manager. I have never heard of him prior to seeing this. I expected him to be another dud since I try to keep up with up and coming new comedians but I was very pleasantly surprised his act was more than entertaining.
Hansel & Gretel (2013)
Asylum's marketing ploy seriously backfires
If you are here, then you already know the movie you're watching is not Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters. Within 5 weeks, three movies titled Hansel and Gretel were released, presumably to piggyback off of the success of the 50 billion U.S dollar Hansel and Gretel. I'm assuming (judging by other reviewers) that everyone watched this thinking they were seeing the big Hollywood blockbuster that was heavily marketed. Hence: the hatred. This is an Asylum movie. It isn't their best but definitely not their worst either. The performances and effects are decent as far as Asylum movies go. The storyline is good and there's definitely enough tension to keep you looking at the screen till the end credits. In short: if you like Asylum movies (low budget cheesy horror, mostly) you will absolutely love this one. If you're thinking this movie is the big blockbuster Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters then you will be extremely displeased.
InAPPropriate Comedy (2013)
Thank God I didn't check IMDb before seeing this
I almost certainly wouldn't have watched it with a rating of 2.9. Having seen it, I think it warrants somewhere between 4.5 to 5.5 but I gave up trying to understand the bipolarity of the IMDb community in recent years. First of all, the movie title pretty much tells it all. It's inappropriate comedy. Taboo comedy that doesn't necessarily appeal to the main stream population. Now, if you're part of the main stream population (all buttoned up, all proper and all civil- world-oriented) you will very likely not like it. The whole movie is nothing but a short sketches of off-color comedy. That is: jokes about homosexuals, Jews, porn and the envied practice of sugar-daddying. To me personally, I thought this movie had hilarious moments that could have been delivered better but they weren't so that's what that is. I gave the movie a 5 which is pretty high on the comedy genre (not particularly a fan) but I honestly enjoyed the political-incorrectness. I think most people are too wound-up and uptight so I've always got a kick from throwing a little race joke (about my own race-Arab- terrorist jokes) and the reactions of WASP-y folks (look up WASP if you're not American) always made it ten-times more hilarious to me. I've always thought taboo-ing certain issues leads to ignorance which leads to fear which leads to violence. Make jokes about anything and everything (not about my prophet though or I'll track you down and bomb you) and maybe then we can get to know each other REALLY. To summerize, if you're a person who gets easily offended by listening to racial or sexual jokes then do NOT see this movie under any circumstance. If you, however, a person who laughs heartily with no bigoted, prejudgmental prejudice then by all means go see this movie and you will probably get a kick out of it.
Bridget Everett: Gynecological Wonder (2015)
Pure Off-Color Humor
Bridgette Everett performs a Central Comedy special in Joe's Pub in NYC. The show is basically comic sketches and musical acts that heavily incorporate the audience to make them even funnier. The jokes are pretty much all off-color, crude and even disturbing at times but it's very, very entertaining. I'm definitely not a fan of such humor (toilet humor, sexual humor, etc.) but I had a wide grin on my face the whole time and even a few LOL moments and I caught my wife, who's also anti-off-color-humor, giggling a few times. Including my own vote, 10 users voted an average of 6.1 for this show which is just about right. The breakdown of votes show females over 45 years old gave it the poorest rating so you know the show isn't for everyone but I'll go out on a limb and say I think everyone under 45 will enjoy this show. Not everyone will love it or even like it but they will be entertained just as I have. Honestly, and this is not flattering but I'm being honest, most of the time I couldn't avert my eyes in the way you can't look away from a highway car wreck. Here's a huge, over- weight, older white lady talking about her bosom and vagina and telling jokes about her sexual appetite and appeal. Even better, the way she climbs off the stage and interact with her audience in extremely unexpected manners. The audience themselves are probably not random people off the street but rather selected fans and maybe paid actors but I bet my house and dog they were entertained like crazy that evening. Lastly, I've never seen or heard of Bridgette before this show but it seems she has quite the fan base among A-list Hollywood stars. The cameos in the opening credits show you this but the cameo at the end credit is even bigger and better. To summarize this show, Bridgette opened the show asking a couple on the first row if they attended her show before. They reply yes. Bridgette says: "and you're sitting on the front row, you sick bitches!"
Little Red (2012)
Breathtaking
It's a bit depressing that almost 3 years after this movie was released, only 12 IMDb members have rated it. Little Red is a modern adaptation of the famous Little Red Riding Hood tale. Ruth, aka Red (Hannah Obst), is an 11 year old girl from Milwaukee who's forced by her parents to go to girls' winter camp. On a whim, she decides to change her plane to go to Florida and ultimately to fulfill her dream of seeing wild horses running on the beach of Cumberland Island. However, Red gets noticed by a predator (Mark Metcalf) who decides he will stop at nothing to get his sick desires with Little Red. I say again it's depressing that only 12 people viewed the movie because, to me, it was beyond superb. The acting isn't anything special but you can tell everyone is doing their absolute best. The fact that the protagonist is played by a child who has never acted before or since is incredible. Mark Metcalf was overwhelmingly menacing and creepy. The exterior shots were great. All in all, a very solid movie considering it must have been done on a shoe lace budget. I'd recommend this film to anyone who isn't squeamish about exploring the depths of child molestation and pre-teen psyche. 7/10
Goodbye World (2013)
Not the Run of the Mill Post Apocalytic Movie
The only reason I write this review is because of the sheer number of other reviews that are either rated 1-2 (worst. Movie. Ever) or 9-10 (never seen a greater movie). So this is an attempt at a non bipolar review. In a nutshell without giving up spoilers, a group of former college friends happen to be all shacked up in a country house when the apocalypse takes place and law and order crumble. Like some other reviews mentioned, this is NOT the typical post- apocalyptic movie. It isn't the Walking Dead nor it is Sandra Oh's Last night. Rather, it tried to be a mixture of mild violence and psychological and changes and a lot of background drama. This isn't necessary a bad mixture. There are dozens of movies that show us the blood and gore in the days after the apocalypse. There aren't even close movies that discuss the emotional side of it. Not in a realistic way, anyway. For every day Joe (that's all of us) if the apocalypse does happen today we won't go running around the streets waving machetes like total maniacs. All this said, I liked the atmosphere of the movie. This is a movie under the genre "this COULD happen". However, halfway through the movie, it started to get cliché and by the last 3rd it was just going through the motions. I'm not sure how the script goes but it seemed to me the script was written for the first half of the movie and after that they just made it up as they went. Characters started behaving out-of- normal-and-post-apocalyptic- character. Coincidences started to happen more and more. And the ending was probably the most unfulfilling ending I've seen in a long time. It had a complete feeling of just throwing things together to wrap up and move on. All in all, it was a good movie and I don't regret my time watching it but I'm extremely disappointed to see something that could have been so much better was wrapped up in a rush. I give it 5/10 for trying and managing to be a movie that's neither an indie nor a Hollywood blockbuster.
White Wall (2010)
To post-apocalyptic movie lovers.. Warning
I discovered this movie by searching "post-apocalyptic" right after watching the Book of Eli. I checked a couple of user reviews that stated things along the line "best action movie ever created in the history of film making" and "a masterpiece not to be missed".
So, after watching the first 20 minutes, I started fast-forwarding. After 40 minutes I just kept hoping someone would come along to shoot me in the face and put me out of my misery.
The movie doesn't have a real plot and the script could have been written by a 12-year old kid, very likely it was as a matter of fact. The fight-sequences are so badly performed to the point of being comic. The list goes on and on for why this movie is a very successful way if you want to lower your IQ, fall asleep real fast or both.
The one and only positive thing I can say about this movie is that the guy knows his martial arts. He is clearly well trained and for that thank heaven because the rest of the actors could not fight if their lives depended on it. He was still a bad actor, though.
So, why is it that the reviews I read were "singing praises for this glorious masterpiece"? Well, a quick check reveals that all the incredibly positive reviews were done by accounts opened on the same day and pretty much commented on nothing else but this movie.
Conclusion, if the cast of this movie spent as much time in acting classes as they spent flooding IMDb with false reviews, this movie wouldn't have been so terrible.
2/10 (only because of a couple semi-decent fight scenes)
Riders (2002)
Good IL Action
Four kids rob banks, hijack armor-vehicles and the twist here is that they extreme-sport their way out (SURPRISE!). Although while watching the movie I felt like I've seen it already (it used some ideas from other well-known heist movies, but, truth be told, tried adding something here and there).
** SPOILERS ** The part I REALLY loved in the movie was the car stunts. Most of the chases were done in the good old way. Manually! Most of the sequences were done by stunt men (and very good ones at that.. bravo). The acting, however, wasn't as good. Natasha Henstridge's role in the movie wasn't even explained (she pops into the police station with a special assignment to bring down the criminals.. a few seconds later she, incidentally, moves into a building close to Slim's.. Oh Please.. And what's with love scene anyway? you don't even know the guy for crying out loud!). Clé Bennett and Steven McCarthy are, relatively, Samuel L. Jackson and Tom Green wanna-bes. They acted great, but, me personally, if I wanted to see Jackson or Green I would go and rent a Jackson or a Green movie. Not that I didn't enjoy their acting, anyway. Stephen Dorff out did himself; outstanding performance. Finally, Bruce Payne is the black dot on this movie. Over-dramatizing every small detail isn't the key to convincing. He acts like the chief of police in a 70's flick (and not one of the very good flicks, either).
Having said all of the mean things, the movie is enjoyable and I didn't regret spending time watching it. If you are sick and tired of watching movies done with computers more than real people, this movie is definitely going to be to your liking.
3-1/2 out of 5.
Shooting Lily (1996)
Destructive Affections
David Hitchcock (Matt Winston) and Lily Hitchcock (Amy Smallman) are getting divorced after 6 years of what David thought was a very happy marriage. David is into the habit of making home movies, so he sits home and tries to configure what went wrong. Later on, upon deciding he know what mistakes resulted in the divorce, he struggles to re-kindle the once-great relationship.
Basically, the movie takes you through the hardships that newly-divorced face in the change of their daily routine and what they do to overcome a failing relationship.
I never married, so I don't really have experience in the subject but I thought the movie managed to convey reality. And, as corny as it may sound, it DID help me go through a very hard breakup.
**** out of 5.