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Holmes & Watson: Madrid Days (2012)
Awfully boring
For nearly no reason at all, a very un-Holmes-like Sherlock Holmes travels to Madrid with a very un-Watson-like Dr. Watson. Sure, some crimes have been committed there, but Holmes is only interested in rubbing elbows with Madrid's high society; the crimes are just a nuisance to which he dedicates precious few efforts.
It looks like the only intent of the film is chanting the virtues of the city of Madrid, but falls flat on this attempt. There is one single scene when the Detective shows his true self, showing-off with a series of deductions on journalist Josito Alcántara (Víctor Clavijo's performance is one of the few redeeming points in this film), and then just a cheap tourist brochure. Oh, no, don't even expect to see a charming love letter to a city, a la Woody Allen's "Midnight in Paris"; in this case, it is just Holmes and Watson exchanging inane comments on the city features.
Most scenes are pointless and, just when it looks like something interesting is about to happen, fade in black and switch to another expendable scene. Time just passes and nothing happens.
When the disappointing ending arrives (I will not spoil it here), you somehow don't feel so disappointed: you were expecting that all the time, given the lack of interest displayed by everybody during the film.
But don't be relieved, either: there are still a good fifteen minutes of additional pointless scenes.
Tornado Run (1995)
Ed Wood meets Top Gun
'Tornado Run' is to 'Top Gun' as 'R.O.T.O.R.' is to 'Robocop', for those in the know.
Some friends of mine happened to present my with this oeuvre for my birthday. So I organised to view the movie all together, and it was a riot.
IMDb warns you about not writing spoilers in your comments; quite difficult to write them in this case, as none of us had a clear idea of the plot. Sure, there are some baddies with a remote control (a wireless phone, in fact) that activates some bombs around the world, and the goodies fly an elite (ahem) combat patrol. But why do they do it? Where in the world are the baddies? Why are they sending a group of aircraft, when it is clear that they are inside some office building? And what happens in the end? No idea.
Use of stock footage is wonderful. It looks like they selected the images containing the most varied array of aircraft they could find, so they never match each other even if remotely. And the bad girls wardrobe is equally abysmal, changing every other scene for no apparent reason. They seem taken from a cheap soft-core production, as you could expect.
So, if you plan on having a great laugh with a group of friends, this is your film. Otherwise, stay clear.