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Reviews
The Usual Suspects (1995)
Slow and very predictable
This was so slow going then when it did get going it became so predictable who Soze was and even i guessed he wasn't a cripple which came to light at the very end. How is this garbage rated so high on here?.
Following a truck hijack in New York, five criminals are arrested and brought together for questioning. As none of them are guilty, they plan a revenge operation against the police. The operation goes well, but then the influence of a legendary mastermind criminal called Keyser Söze is felt. It becomes clear that each one of them has wronged Söze at some point and must pay back now. The payback job leaves 27 men dead in a boat explosion, but the real question arises now: Who actually is Keyser Söze?-Soumitra.
No Name on the Bullet (1959)
Not bad but not great either
Probably a great movie back in the day but i found it very predictable once the judge came into the picture. You just knew from that moment he was the one that he was there to assassinate with him getting friendly with the daughter and her future husband the Doc aka Blacksmith. The ending was terrible and could have been done a whole lot better. As my title say's...Not bad but not great either.
Cool, cultured John Gant rides into Lordsburg. Gant is a professional killer, and although no one knows who he is there to kill, they are all worried. Everyone has enemies, and maybe Gant is in town for them. While they wait for him to make his move, paranoia starts taking over..
Spoorloos (1988)
Absolute garbage
Absolute garbage. Can't believe someone recommended this rubbish to me and the ending was just plain stupid. The movie from start to finish is one big bore fest.
Rex and Saskia are on holiday, a young couple in love. They stop at a busy service station and Saskia disappears. Rex dedicates the next three years trying to find her. Then he receives some postcards from her abductor, who promises to reveal what has happened to Saskia. The abductor, Raymond Lemorne, is a chilling character to whom Rex is drawn by his intense desire to learn the truth behind his lovers disappearance. The truth is more sinister than he dared imagine.
Speak No Evil (2024)
It was ok
Haven't seen the original but this was ok. The first two thirds of the movie were really good the the last third just got annoying with the useless and i mean completely useless husband scenario that ruined the whole movie for me but i gave it a generous 6/10 because McEvoy is a great actor and kept this movie above water.
When an American family is invited to spend the weekend at the idyllic country estate of a charming British family they befriended on vacation, what begins as a dream holiday soon warps into a snarled psychological nightmare. As the weekend progresses, they realize that a strange side lies within the family who invited them: the untrammeled hospitality of the charismatic, alpha-male estate owner masks an unspeakable darkness.-Speak no Evil Movie.
Alien: Romulus (2024)
Bloody Awful
Bloody Awful and the worst one of the lot. It was just repetitive to all the originals. So predictable and you knew what was going to happen next to even what was coming thirty minutes down the line. Just reminded me of the Sigourney Weaver and Winona Ryder Alien but here with different characters but worse actors in this one. Don't waste your time.
While scavenging the deep ends of a derelict space station, a group of young space colonists come face to face with the most terrifying life form in the universe.
While scavenging the deep ends of a derelict space station, a group of young space colonists come face to face with the most terrifying life form in the universe.
Dog (2024)
A Whole Movie Experience in a Short Time.........
I watch a hell of a lot of movies here whether they be feature length or short like this one and have to say this was excellent in every way. The movie itself is an easy watch from start to finish, with a simple plot/storyline to follow along to.
The acting was superb by all the cast including the dog. The camera shots/angles and directing throughout this short movie were on a par with a Hitchcock or Kubrick say, really focusing on everything especially the characters. A lot of thought went into camera placement for certain shots like inside the car scenes etc.
If the movie was a feature length film I'm a hundred percent positive I would have enjoyed it also but would have brought some popcorn along.
The Watchers (2024)
Predictable and Boring....
Predictable and Boring from the start, Don't even bother with this garbage.
This forest isn't charted on any map. Every car breaks down at its treeline. Mina's is no different. Left stranded, she is forced into the dark woodland only to find a woman shouting, urging Mina to run to a concrete bunker. As the door slams behind her, the building is besieged by screams. Mina finds herself in a room with a wall of glass, and an electric light that activates at nightfall, when the Watchers come above ground. These creatures emerge to observe their captive humans and terrible things happen to anyone who doesn't reach the bunker in time.
The Last Stop in Yuma County (2023)
Dumbest Movie of the Century
This is easily the dumbest movie i ever did see and only fit for a bunch of simpletons. It started off great then just went completely stupid right upto the end. What a waste of time watching this after the reviews were so highly rated. Absolute garbage.
While stranded at a rural Arizona rest stop, a traveling salesman is thrust into a dire hostage situation by the arrival of two bank robbers with no qualms about using cruelty-or cold, hard steel-to protect their bloodstained fortune. While stranded at a rural Arizona rest stop, a traveling salesman is thrust into a dire hostage situation by the arrival of two bank robbers with no qualms about using cruelty-or cold, hard steel-to protect their bloodstained fortune.
Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes (2024)
Quite the let down
Quite the let down. I grew up with the originals and the tv series and as the newer ones were made they've gotten worse and worse as they've been produced. The lead lady was just awful, the movie was slow throughout. I wasn't very excited by the terrible trailers for this one and it didn't disappoint but i had to give it a go. Maybe it's time they left them well alone and focused on something new instead of trying to destroy a great idea that came out of the 60's/70's originals but that's Hollywood for you with all the prequels and sequels nowadays.
Also i still prefer Tim Burton's planet of the apes to these newer ones along with the make-up, wished they had continued from there.
AVPR: Aliens vs Predator - Requiem (2007)
Bloody Awful
Bloody awful : - You may aswell watch a blank TV screen in the dark with a bedside lamp on in the corner this movies that bad to see and watch. You can't make out half the time which creature is the Alien or which one is the Predator and the casting sucks. Definitely made a mistake letting whoever make and direct this garbage. So so bad.
No one can escape from the aggressive predatory Xenomorphs. With this in mind, a crippled Predator spaceship crash-lands on the dense forest of Gunnison, Colorado, right after the Antarctic bloodshed in AVP: Alien vs. Predator (2004). As a result, a vicious Predalien hybrid, along with myriads of Stage 1 Xenomorphs, or Face-huggers, scatter in all directions, infecting everyone unfortunate enough to cross their path. Once more, the Earth is a battlefield, as both extraterrestrial species fight for supremacy. Now, with the humans stuck in the middle of a brutal face-off, Sheriff Eddie Morales must protect the city with a handful of residents. However, motivation alone is not enough. Can a team of inexperienced defenders ensure the fate of humankind?-Nick Riganas.
Stir (1980)
Excellent Australian Prison Movie
This is an excellent Australian prison movie with a great cast. Stumbled across this whilst looking for a movie to watch here and glad i did. Found out after watching it's based on true events and the real brutality that went on from prison guards mistreating inmates. Won't go into to much detail but give it a watch if you get the chance. Australian film making at it's finest from a Scotsman.
When a repeat offender returns to a prison after exposing abuses committed by its guards to the press, tensions boil between inmates and staff, culminating in a bloody riot. When a repeat offender returns to a prison after exposing abuses committed by its guards to the press, tensions boil between inmates and staff, culminating in a bloody riot.
Kung Fu Panda 4 (2024)
Boring
Boring. This was so boring and i gave up after around half an hour. Loved the first three but just could not get into this one at all. Just bored me from the off, shame really but oh well.
Po is gearing up to become the spiritual leader of his Valley of Peace, but also needs someone to take his place as Dragon Warrior. As such, he will train a new kung fu practitioner for the spot and will encounter a villain called the Chameleon who conjures villains from the past.
Po is gearing up to become the spiritual leader of his Valley of Peace, but also needs someone to take his place as Dragon Warrior. As such, he will train a new kung fu practitioner for the spot and will encounter a villain called the Chameleon who conjures villains from the past.
Heartbeat: Coming of Age (2002)
Daft Ending
Daft episode and ending. PC Phil Bellamy get's shot and PC Tom Nicholson gets shot dead but at the end at the funeral Bellamy is at the funeral service but Jenny who Tom's been dating isn't there to see him off in his coffin. Bad writing.
The walking disaster area PPC Nicholson comes of age and the whole village is planning a surprise party for him. To keep him - and everybody else - out of harms way Sergeant Merton sends him out to check tax discs together with PC Bellamy. Jimmy Sutton is suspected to be involved in an armed robbery and the Ashfordly police are asked to check on his whereabouts, but neither his mother nor his wife Lesley have heard from him. PC Bellamy stumbles across the robbers hiding out in the woods, and when he is injured PPC Nicholson offers to be their hostage instead. A heroic action with tragic consequences for him. Lord Ashfordly is playing host to a party of American veterans from World War II. Vernon Scripps persuades him to let the local brass band to be responsible for the entertainment. This is a bad idea because the band leader George Sugden does not like Americans and especially not this lot.
The Iron Claw (2023)
Absolute garbage
Absolute garbage watching bad actors perform as even worse bad actors in a wrestling ring. I gave it forty minutes of my time but this was awful and i liked Saturday wrestling as a child here in Great Britain in the 1970's and yes wrestling got even worse from the 1990's but couldn't stomach any more of this crap.
The true story of the inseparable Von Erich brothers, who made history in the intensely competitive world of professional wrestling in the early 1980s. Through tragedy and triumph, under the shadow of their domineering father and coach, the brothers seek larger-than-life immortality on the biggest stage in sports.-A24.
Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 (2015)
OMG!!!
OMG!!!.....This was absolutely horrendous beyond belief. This wouldn't even make a good comedy for an infant let alone teenagers. Just awful.
After six years of keeping our malls safe, Paul Blart has earned a well-deserved vacation. He heads to Vegas with his teenage daughter before she heads off to college. But safety never takes a holiday and when duty calls, Blart answers. After six years of keeping our malls safe, Paul Blart has earned a well-deserved vacation. He heads to Vegas with his teenage daughter before she heads off to college. But safety never takes a holiday and when duty calls, Blart answers.
Heartbeat: Red Herring (1994)
Terrible Episode
Terrible episode from the bad pretend Russian accents to the cheesy James Bond spy nonsense.
Believing he has killed his captain in a brawl the Russian sailor Vladimir Ivanov makes himself scarce and asks PC Rowan for political asylum. But Ivanov does not trust immigration officer Fillingham and clears out once again during transport to the immigration office in York. To satisfy his hunger he steals the lunch of Dr. Radcliffe's daughter Jennifer, who is on a field trip with her class. Jennifer wanders off with her friend Dennis and follows the Russian with a childish notion of catching him and become heroes of the day. Sergeant Blaketon starts a big search for both the Russian and the two children.
The King of Queens: Inner Tube (2001)
Bloody Awful
Without doubt the worst episode so far in the series from series 1-3. The acting is atrocious throughout from the whole cast except Stiller.
When Doug lies to wife Carrie so he can play mud football, he gets sick and starts feeling guilty. He then has dreams about it based on television shows such as Wheel of Fortune, The Young and The Restless and the 1971 ABC-TV film Brian's Song. When Doug lies to wife Carrie so he can play mud football, he gets sick and starts feeling guilty. He then has dreams about it based on television shows such as Wheel of Fortune, The Young and The Restless and the 1971 ABC-TV film Brian's Song.
The Waltons: The Baptism (1976)
Bloody awful episode
I'm two thirds of the way through this episode and it's bloody awful. I'm a Christian but even i felt i was being screamed at and preached to through my tv screen by the Rev. Ezekiel L. Henshaw and paused the video to come here and down vote this horrible episode. These Waltons and Prairie were good shows from the 70's but no, episodes like this don't belong on a tv screen where one might wonder if the producers were trying to get their messages/faith across to the public through tv.
A famous revival preacher (John Karlen) is coming to town, and Esther and Olivia hope that John and Ben will be converted and baptized. John is almost struck by lightning during a storm, which some see as an omen. A peacock wanders onto the home place and is adopted by Jim-Bob who nicknames him "Rover"
The Waltons (1972)
Not seen this since the 70's
Haven't seen this show in almost 50yrs and i'm half way through i think. Nearly at the end of season 4 and you can see that Little House on the Prairie copied a lot of the stories, ideas and plots from The Waltons. Don't understand why they would cast two of the female children the same age as two of the male children which would have given The Waltons two sets of twins in the family when there was in fact no twins. A strange one. An ok show though a lot of the episodes are quite boring and like Little House there's far too much of John-Boy and Laura Ingles in these two shows.
In the Blue Ridge Mountains of Virginia, during the Great Depression, the Walton family makes its small income from its sawmill on Walton's Mountain. The story is told through the eyes of eldest son John-Boy, who wants to be a novelist, goes to college, and eventually fulfills his dream. The saga follows the family through economic depression and World War II; and through growing up, school, courtship, marriage, employment, birth, aging, illness, and death.
The Waltons: The Search (1976)
A whiney Brat
Elizabeth is A Whiney Brat from start to finish in this episode and gets monotonous and tedious throughout. Never one of my favourite characters in this show and from memories growing up as a kid in the 70's to nearly 50yrs on i still remember why i hated her character along with Mary Ellens, both whinging brats.
Olivia takes Jim-Bob and Elizabeth on a trip to visit family, but along the way their tire blows out, they get lost in the woods and stumble upon a moonshiner cabin. Out of fear of being caught by authorities, the moonshiners take Olivia and the kids further into the woods and leave them stranded. Meanwhile the Walton men start a search party to find the missing family members who must survive in the woods overnight during a storm.
Expend4bles (2023)
Absolute Garbage
Never seen a movie where all the cast were this awful at acting. I know Stallone can't act for toffee after numerous films but he's gotten worse with age along with his wigs and botox. Megan Fox can't act and her botox face looks even worse than Stallone's. Overall movie was utter garbage and very amateurish.
A new generation of stars join the world's top action stars for an adrenaline-fueled adventure in Expend4bles. Reuniting as the team of elite mercenaries, Jason Statham, Dolph Lundgren, Randy Couture, and Sylvester Stallone are joined for the first time by Curtis "50 Cent" Jackson, Megan Fox, Tony Jaa, Iko Uwais, Jacob Scipio, Levy Tran, and Andy Garcia. Armed with every weapon they can get their hands on and the skills to use them, The Expendables are the world's last line of defense and the team that gets called when all other options are off the table. But new team members with new styles and tactics are going to give "new blood" a whole new meaning.-Lionsgate.
Blue Beetle (2023)
Venom meets Iron Man in a Cheesy Comedy.
Venom meets Iron Man in a cheesy comedy. This is the biggest pile of cheesy cr@p i have seen for a very long time. It was like they took a bunch of paper comics and movies and stole every idea out of them and threw in the most annoying Mexican family on earth. Bloody awful movie.
An alien scarab chooses Jaime Reyes to be its symbiotic host, bestowing the recent college graduate with a suit of armor that's capable of extraordinary powers, forever changing his destiny as he becomes the superhero known as Blue Beetle. An alien scarab chooses Jaime Reyes to be its symbiotic host, bestowing the recent college graduate with a suit of armor that's capable of extraordinary powers, forever changing his destiny as he becomes the superhero known as Blue Beetle.
The Angels' Share (2012)
An Absolute Gem.
Can't believe it's been 11yrs now since i watched this movie when it first came out. It's an absolute gem. It's well worth a 10/10 and i don't get why people write reviews praising a movie like this then only score it a 6 or a 7, complete numpties if you aske me. If you haven't seen The Angel's Share by now and your Scottish then where the hell have you been for the past decade or so, under a rock?.
This bitter sweet comedy follows protagonist Robbie as he sneaks into the maternity hospital to visit his young girlfriend Leonie and hold his newborn son Luke for the first time. Overwhelmed by the moment, he swears that Luke will not have the same tragic life he has had. Escaping a prison sentence by the skin of his teeth, he's given one last chance......While serving a community service order, he meets Rhino, Albert and Mo who, like him, find it impossible to find work because of their criminal records. Little did Robbie imagine how turning to drink might change their lives - not cheap fortified wine, but the best malt whiskies in the world. Will it be 'slopping out' for the next twenty years, or a new future with 'Uisge Beatha' the 'Water of Life?' Only the angels know.
The Last Voyage of the Demeter (2023)
ZZZZzzzz boring
Huge fan of Dracula but this was terrible and daft all at the same time. The last hour seemed to get more and more unbelievable and dragged. Dracula looked like something between a gargoyle and gollum.
Based on a single chapter, the Captain's Log, from Bram Stoker's classic 1897 novel "Dracula", the story is set aboard the Russian schooner Demeter, which was chartered to carry private cargo - 24 unmarked wooden crates - from Carpathia to London. The film will detail the strange events that befell the doomed crew as they attempt to survive the ocean voyage, stalked each night by a terrifying presence on board the ship. When it finally arrived near Whitby Harbour, it was derelict. There was no trace of the crew.
Summerfield (1977)
Slow and boring
Davey is shagging his own sister resulting in their child having a rare blood type. A teacher finds out and Davey kills his sister he was shagging and their daughter from their relationship. Watch if you're really bored.
Simon Robinson arriving in a small seaside community to take over as teacher at the local school. He makes the acquaintance of siblings Jenny and David Abbott, and Jenny's daughter Sally, who live on the island estate of Summerfield. The discovery that his predecessor vanished without a trace and, that Sally has a rare blood disorder lead Simon to try to uncover the truth behind the mystery.