Change Your Image
martimusross
Film matters and a fair appreciation of these high art products becomes ever more important, I live by this maxim.
The purpose of any criticism is not to destroy casually the work of others, but to recognise excellence and areas of improvement and to add to the understanding of what was intended and has that intention been realised within context.
Lastly, criticism needs to call out any sort of doctrine, ideology or political stance that seeks to pervert public thought for its own purposes, a gentle liberal approach to life is good as a stance, but if this leads to a dumbing down, liberal authoritarianism or societal controls on freedoms of expression this must be steadfastly resisted.
Film needs to be brave and not just give the public what is wants in the pursuit of profit and recognition, like any great art it must exist in some purity and often we all need to be presented with shocking and upsetting thoughts and images in contradiction with our own lives.
Reluctantly if film matters so do awards and critism helps to contain and restrain the excesses of those who would seek to subvert the Oscars and the Baftas for their own narrow political reasons. An award must fundamentally be there to recognise excellence and any other result is a significant betrayal of public trust, brings that organisation into disrepute and ultimately damages the very industry it was created to promote and support.
Film enriches our world.
Reviews
Interview with the Vampire (2022)
Total Rubbish!
Interview With The Vampire
I couldn't be more disappointed, whatever this was it wasn't Anne Rice and her book Interview With A Vampire, there was little evidence of the source material. So it is very difficult to write a review just as Bridgerton is nothing like the book, this is the same, and an invention of a TV producer rather than Anne Rice. It focused on identity politics rather than any serious reworking of the book.
Anne Rice's novel was a serious, stylish and dramatic updating of the traditional vampire story, the movie that followed reflected that and was stuffed with Hollywood megastars. This, however, was a light TV romp with fangs, I laughed out loud many times as the absurd and over-contrived modern sensibilities were forced into the plot lines.
Season 2 was a total disaster and it became over-wordy, I hated the whole thing, at best this is a 3 outta 10.
Love Lies Bleeding (2024)
Turgid Stuff, Avoid!
Love Lies Bleeding
Not a movie I would recommend to anyone not even ardent fans of Kristen Stewart. To be honest in many of her roles she has the look but she just has no heft as an actor, beyond a grimace and a snarl.
The strange lesbian romp in a hick town seemed to focus on growth hormones and domestic violence. And Jackie, the would be body building contestant and love interest bulked up and then hulked out literally and metaphorically at different points in the movie.
The same sex scenes were pedestrian, the violence was of shock value, the dialogue banal and the chemistry laughable.
This really should never have got the green light to be made as it went straight to video. At best this is a 4 outta 10, and stiff beyond imagining!
Those About to Die (2024)
Sword & Sandal Soap
Those About To Die
This sword and sandal saga was not without some really good bits but it lacked some proper compelling storylines. I Claudius it was not!
What would Mary Beard have made of this?
This show tried to capture in some detail the major entertainments of Ancient Rome. It was very specific and confined itself to Chariot racing and the new games planned for the Coliseum, this new amphitheater is being constructed in the background of the whole show.
We learned much of the racing by seeing it all brought to life and it really was spectacular.
However they overlaid the history with some stories that quite frankly reflected our modern world and others that pandered to a tickbox agenda. These kind of distorted history shows need to come with a firm warning otherwise people will believe some of these strange inclusions, and the last time I looked at the map, Italy was not a province in Africa.
We had some acting heavyweights and they certainly added to this that otherwise would have been a very bland saga. Iwan Rheon and Sara Martins were the best and were the rock upon which this show relied.
Overall, I'm going to give this a firm 6 out of 10 and I look forward to series 2, and getting back to Mary Beard she would've thought this was a load of Tosh!
The Turkish Detective (2023)
Great Fun!
The Turkish Detective
Kind of a Turkish Montalbano, this series hit the ground running with the introduction of a young former MET police detective and an avuncular inspector Cetin Ikmen, played by Haluk Bilginer.
Whilst seeming everything Turkish it really was a just an English type Sunday night detective drama displaying a whole set of tropes alien to Turkey. Bear in mind Istanbul is the setting for Midnight Express.
I mustn't be overly critical because I enjoyed it immensely, Haluk Bilginer was a class act, he delivered in spades and was deep memorable and believable. As for Ethan Kai and Yasmine Kay Alan, they were dependable, if emotional, part of the detective team, towards the end I really got the feeling that there was a great deal of chemistry between the trio.
I look forward to a series 2 and I'm going to give this a firm 7 outta 10. This was great watching and while some of the plot turns were absurd, we forgave them.
The Instigators (2024)
Not Bad At All!
The Instigators
Basically a couple of morons and a botched robbery. The cast had some heavyweights and seemingly to get their monies worth we had an over-wordy script.
In terms of comedy it struggled, but as the movie progressed it grew on you.
Overall I enjoyed it and the action sequences really were quite a thrill, my personal favourite was the mayor's lawyer played by Toby Jones but Ron Perlman as the mayor was a magnificent grotesque of corruption.
The comic timing partially worked between the leads but for poor Matt Damon it didn't come naturally and seemed quite forced at times, whereas Casey Affleck has made a career of "odd-ball".
I'm giving this a firm 7 outta 10, well worth a watch but clearly a boys movie.
Of an Age (2022)
Terrible, skip this!
Of An Age
Seemingly some sort of university film project with lots of enthusiasm but no budget. The story was tissue thin and acting stiff as a stick.
Some elements were simply lifted from strictly ballroom, it was so derivative, and deeply contrived.
The first 30 minutes we were treated to some breathless freneticism as these two losers attempted to get to a dancing final, but who would help these rude and demanding people, the answer no one. The need to like someone in this movie is vital for viewers to invest in it!
The idea that a road trip to pick up his female dance partner would be an opportunity for a gay liaison is beyond absurd, particularly when he stopped the car to puke up, a most unattractive scene.
The music grated supposedly trying to match the emotions on screen but to my mind the sound of a car crash or train wreck would be more apposite.
The actress that played Ebony was a disaster, we couldn't understand her diction and her hysterical acting made you want to walk out, talk about miscasting. As for the actor playing Col he seemed to have been told to act like a needy puppy, I laughed out loud as these strange "meaningful" glances, it was squirmy! Circling like sharks it was terrible, I've had more action on the 29 bus from central London.
They seemed to want to present this as a grand romantic love story when it was nothing more than a squalid one night stand premeditated by an older and more experienced man on a vulnerable migrant.
Overall, it was a nasty mess and I'm giving it 3 out of 10 meaning skip this drivel!
Maman est chez le coiffeur (2008)
A Rambling Mess!
Mommy Is At The Hairdresser's
Set in 1966 the movies approaches the themes with the ideas of the time, much was good as I will explore, but the movie failed to examine clearly the drivers that lay behind behaviour. Seeming autobiographical it was largely presented as a series of emotional responses, how "French".
For a mother to abandon her children (if I don't leave I will die) as presented in the movie is one thing but to movie to London, another country and continent is another. An overheard conversation and an inference is not a sufficient driver, it needed to be stated clearly, she believed he had a homosexual lover who he played golf with. However this was not discussed between mommy and daddy and it needed to be for coherence. If this was the case she could have moved out nearby and relocated with the children.
Instead of feeling sympathy for the mother we hated her for her selfishness.
The movie then segwayed into a children's movie trying to understand parental behaviour. The leading understander was Eloise the daughter who sorted solace with a local mute fly fisherman who made flies to sell.
To my mind as a movie is was visually ravishing but the story lacked emotional intelligence or any arch like structure. This is a 3 outta 10 from me!
Drifter (2023)
It Was Terrible
Drifter
We again had a reductive movie about gay men and the scene, this time in Berlin. They seemed to undertake a tick box of tropes, we had every form of drug taking fuelling sex parties. We had transitory relationships that constantly repeated introductory material, how old are you, what your name, what are you into, how old are you, believe me relationships moved beyond this.
Then we had the preoccupation that someone always wants to be in a relationship and they are worried about being alone, what rubbish!
We then had a series of Monday botched sex scenes that really in 2024 failed to titillate.
The story was vestigial the acting stiff there was little narrative flow. They really wasn't any story to speak of apart from some newbie coming to Berlin and experiencing everything for the first time.
I'm going to give this a firm 3 out of 10. I was bored senseless.
The Dead Don't Hurt (2023)
Great Western
The Dead Don't Hurt
If you like a good western then this is the movie for you. We had some brilliant characters, a strong story, a tight script, a romance and some propers baddies what more could one ask for!
There seemed a great deal of authenticity to this story of newly arrived Americans forging their lives in the Wild West against all odds. With that said we had some modern inclusions,"I like to work, I like to earn my own money" stated Vivienne, not only that she was predatory in hunting down her man to meet her sexual needs. Not facets usually present in the history of the Klondike.
The music was excellent. The camera work was excellent and we had some really fabulous acting, I can't really find any fault in the movie except that overall it was very sad, is that a fault? I don't know.
I'm going to give this a firm 8 out of 10. I really enjoyed it and I think anyone that likes a western will enjoy this very much..
The Bikeriders (2023)
I was bored rigid just nothing happened
The Bikeriders
This was such an American story from start to finish, based on a novel that had detailed the creation of a bike gang and how it grew out of control taken over by the disenfranchised youth who wanted to join the club.
Populated by some very big stars, Austin Butler, Tom Hardy and Jodie Comer, but even these quality actors couldn't make a fist out of the repetitive and banal script.
It was so slow, verging on stop, for a a bike gang very little happened they hardly went anywhere they hardly saw anything, and they just seemed to sit around drinking and smoking.
Overall, I hated the movie. It just didn't have a voice. I'm going to give this 3 out of 10. I'd like the time back. I spent watching this movie.
Bad Boys: Ride or Die (2024)
Unbelievably Terrible!
Bad Boys: Ride or Die
Oh dear, I had hoped that at the end of the last banal movie we had seen the end of this excruciating franchise. How much macho posturing can we, the viewer, be subjected to that literarily made me squirm from one scene to another.
Not only was there a vestigial script, nasty stereotyping, preposterous scenarios, and the most egregious and controlling relationships based upon fear and retribution. This movie grandstands this mucho behaviour and promotes it in the most barefaced manner. How can this still exist in 2024!
It does not pass the minimum bar of six out loud laughs per movie I didn't laugh once.
Lastly and perhaps most shockingly this movie was used as a vehicle for the cancelled actor Will Smith to re-enter Hollywood. Previously he presented himself as a black role model across the world, a whole generation copied his supposed wholesome and non-judgemental approach, he then turned out to be nothing more that a violent misogynistic who had hoodwinked the public for years, there is no coming back from that period!
I hated this reductive movie from start to finish I'm not sure who this was made for but whoever is lapping up this rubbish needs to take take a close look at what it is they are admiring.
For me this is a 3 outta 10, at best, I enjoyed some of the stunts.
Challengers (2024)
It Was A Balls Up!
Challengers
Forgive the tennis puns but the director got his balls stuck in the net with this one, we were treated to 2 hours and 4 minutes of tortuous back and forth in time, I was so giddy!
This was a turkey of the highest order and seemingly a vehicle for the promotion of the "goddess" Zendya. I wasn't buying it and neither was anyone else. I have now seen this actress in 4 previous projects and the jury was partially out, but alas now the verdict is in and she is so unbelievably over-hyped, she clearly went to the ABC school of acting, the two faces she employees are petulance and irritation, easily confused with trapped wind, she cannot convey any chemistry on the screen, She is absolutely talentless and I hope this will be the last movie she makes, why throw good money after bed.
This movie was billed as a comedy, the minimum bar is six out loud laughs per movie, I didn't laugh once.
The Script, if I can call it that was vestigial at best, a series of grunts and groans and meaningless glances. The story amounted to a teenager jealous of the lifelong bond between two tennis player mates, she was determined to come between them, why! It was never explained in the movie as to why she felt like that or why she acted the way she did.
The only thing I did enjoy was the chemistry between Josh O'Connor and Mike Faist, they really did as much as they possibly could do with the material they were given. The only other thing that was good in this movie was the tennis matches themselves, that is to say apart from the stupid camera in the ball technique that nearly made me throw up! If there is any award here it goes to the wigs, without which we would not of known where we were at in the movie.
Okay in conclusion this was a terrible movie and I just cannot dream of who this was made for. I'm going to give this a firm 3 out of 10 and all of that is for Josh O'Connor and his faultless American accent why he undertook this project I have no clue, but clearly he was being paid big money.
The Book of Clarence (2023)
I Watched It And Still Have No Clue What It Was About!
The Book Of Clarence
It was quite a challenge to know what to make of this movie, it was neither fish nor foul. The overall theme was a village loser gaining faith in Jerusalem at the time of Jesus.
Was it a comedy, was it religious, was it history.... Having watched it who knows!
The presentation of the movie, with the language, the hierarchy, the interactions could have been just as easily set in Harlem, the movie gained nothing from the setting. The movie was set in the Middle East yet no one in the cast was Middle Eastern, so why set the story there, it was muddled thinking.
My sense was this was meant to be a comedy as everything was so performative and absurd, however to be a comedy the minimum bar is 6 out loud laughs, I laughed once.
As a romance it stunk I will say no more. There were so elements of race but these were so poorly handled as to be inconsequential.
We were just not invested in Clarence we just didn't care what happened to him.
I'm giving this a firm 3 outta 10, I hate quasi-religious movies that attempt the profound. The only thing I enjoyed was the dance sequence that's it! They must've known when they were making this movie that it was a complete and utter turkey!
Minx (2022)
Just About Bearable
Minx
This could have been so much better but what ruined it throughout was the overworking of Joyce's character, constantly indignant, constantly sabotaging any success, constantly shouting, constantly storming in and out. I find it unbelievable that this obvious mistake was allowed to continue again and again and again. Joyce is character needs to evolve, she needs to change move adapt, to achieve her feminist goals. It is self evident in politics, you can achieve nothing in opposition. You need to gain power and work from within the system.
Joyce was played by Ophelia Lovibond and she really needed to vary her acting, it was up up up and never down, an exhausting and irritating watch.
Overall this was a bland 6 outta 10, worth watching but quite a lot of repetition.
Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes (2024)
Great Fun!
Kingdom of the planet of the Apes
It was great fun.
We were far into the future so far we had a brand new story. After a gentle start, three friends searching for eagle eggs as their right of passage into adulthood, the movie turned into an emotional rollercoaster of loss and transformation.
The CGI was faultless and Noah, the films lead conveyed every emotion through a glance and a snarl it really was excellent.
The story was overall was really very well done, I won't say much as that would ruin the movie. We can expect several more as this was very much the beginning of a new franchise.
I'm gonna give this a firm 8 outta 10, the acting was great throughout as were the action sequences and music, overall a great night out.
The Garfield Movie (2024)
Just About Okay!
The Garfield Movie
This was a good movie, not great, just good. It was written for a very young audience and much of the attitude we expect with Garfield was missing, little sarcasm or dry humour, however there were some moments of brilliance, but much was quite predictable.
The animation also was strange in places, Some of it was straight from the cartoon, quite simplistically drawn, then other moments it was detailed and reminiscent of the last two movies. I had got so used to the last Garfield movies I expect to be like that. In much the same way Paddington is drawn in his first two movies.
The story was not very good I'm afraid it will seem to be overly contrived relying on an origin story. This format has been done to death from Harry Potter to Star Wars, no more origin stories that smack of identity politics.
Overall, I really enjoyed the movie. It wasn't what I expected but I did laugh and there were some good cartoon characters. I'm going to give this a firm 6 out of 10 meaning you will enjoy it but it just isn't as good as the previous two Garfield movies.
Ali & Ava (2021)
Depressing Stuff!
Ali & Ava
This was a miserable "love" story in miserable Bradford, the lovers were a grandmother of 5, mother of 4 and a middle aged Indian man with ADHD and marital difficulties, not on the face of it loves young dream lol.
From the start we, the viewer, were oppressed by the weather (it was raining cats and dogs throughout), the characters (down and out on their luck), the drab buildings (needed demolishing) and the overwhelming plethora of issues (mental health, poverty, addiction, race and discrimination). As you can tell it was not an easy watch.
With that said we did have a few great one liners, the script was okay, and we had some moments of brilliance in the chemistry between the two leads, it was touching and believable.
Overall I'm glad I watched it, I never want to see it again and I'm giving it a firm 6 outta 10, note to self "Bradford is not a holiday destination".
More Than Only (2017)
Trite & Patronising, Self-indulgent
More Than Only
There was some good moments but the structure of exploring a different theme each episode just didn't work because at the end of each chapter there was a trite analysis and a mundane wholesome proverb pronounced proclaiming supposedly what we had just watched.
However I watched many things in these stories that just did not conclude what they did. Firstly the depth of their mental health problems had no quick fix, Michael was in the wrong profession, nursing is about dealing with trauma and being detached, he was unable to function. Justin seem to go through a breakdown, a weak at the beach and hug will not solve this!
Neither of them were suitable parents as they constantly abandoned their child, the child's surrogate interfered and was herself in an abusive relationship.
The acting was bearable but the script was tortuous, I didn't like it really I felt patronised and preached at at the same time. The only thing I did like was the assumption they lived in a post gay world, but is was the structure that did for it!
At best this is a 4 outta 10, with some tweaking this may have achieved a much higher mark!
Palm Royale (2024)
Great Fun!
Palm Royale
A cross between Desperate Housewives and Acapulco this was a fluffy story about a desperate interloper looking for social advancement in 1969, in Palm Beach.
The casting agent got this right in choosing Kristen Wiig as the central lead, the script was quite turgid but it was delivered with so much panache and style it was mesmerising. Not to mention the fabulous and over the top styling!
It was stuffed with stars from top to bottom, and Carole Burnett took one of the leads a 91, and delivered in spades.
Overall I enjoyed it very much, I'm giving this a firm 8 outta 10, well worth a watch.
Sugar (2024)
Just About Watchable But Terribly Slow
Sugar
Some good moments but overall is was a labyrinthine clunky mess!
From the start we were subjected to strange and jerky camera movement with angles from above and below somehow making us the viewer feel more in on the action, I found it irritating and enough to give someone a profound headache.
The stilted script and strange dialogue delivered in a cockney accent in Los Angeles by Sugar's handler was bizarre. We were all meant to feel something was a bit off and it was very strange superficial
Style over substance trying to recreate and old fashion private investigator from tv shows and films from the past, and infer sugars point of contact with other human beings was via movies was just too repetitive a scenario. Talk about overworking what someone thought was an interesting theme.
Overall it was slow. It dragged. It was overly complex. There was a whole array of weird acting but the one thing that was good was Colin Farrell. He really was committed to the project and tried his best with the material he was given, he certainly looked the part and I loved the car.
At best this is a 6 out of 10 meeting not really worth watching maybe something to watch on hair night on a rainy Tuesday.
The Iron Claw (2023)
Skip This Turkey
The Iron Claw
Unfortunately the movie did not hold my attention in the vice like grip of the Iron Claw. This was the signature wrestling move of the Von Eric family and the title of the movie.
An entirely American true story that held little interest this side of the pond basically it was an ex wrestler and his wife and their six children and the tragedy that befell 5 of the brothers in turn believing there was a family curse. From the outset you can see it is very difficult to avoid the repetition of the scenarios within this movie and it fell foul of this.
We had some very clunky method acting from Zac Efron and some of his brothers, it really was very minimalist or constantly angry or waiting to explode it was an exhausting watch.
With regard to the hair and make up no one in their right mind can think this was good half the time Zac Efron's wig looked like a dead rodent stuck to his head.
Overall this was at best a 6 out of 10, certainly Zac Efron tried his best as did everybody but the script really was a turkey and I began to wonder why this movie was made in the first place.
Devs (2020)
A Clunky Mess With Some Good Bits
DEVS
It was a painfully slow geek drama that lack any momentum, creepy music and angst amounted to style over substance. Following the clunky beginning we had industrial espionage and murder, what I found unconvincing was the elaborate attempt to conceal the murder when a simple staged car crash would have sufficed.
Sonoya Mizuno won played Lily Chan, the partner of the murdered man, became the central role upon which this entire mini series revolved. Initially I just didn't feel she did enough, but slowly as episode 2 developed I started to enjoy her performance. What was missing was greater characterisation but she was a geek as well so perhaps she got it right.
Amidst this backdrop we had a rogue tech company developing a predictive programme that had the power to look backwards and forwards. However this was clunky as such a programme for just be populated by the mundanity and banal nature of everyday human existence.
One repetitive trope was the phrase "guys can you give me a minute" it was used 3 times in 3 episodes, this was meant to give some profundity to what followed. But it really irritated!
As the series progressed it got slower and they just ran out of ideas, the way to end this with any profundity was a challenge and I can understand why! Overall it was a muddled mess and had a terrible ending so I'm giving this a 5 outta 10, meaning frustrating viewing!
Four Lives (2022)
Well Worth Watching!
Four Lives
This was clearly a very difficult drama to write as the source material was the same series of errors made again and again by the police, and indeed everyone.
With that said the lines written for the first victims family and friends inferred Anthony was both a drug addict and escort, both risky pursuits, when he was neither. Once an impression of Anthony was formed in the CID minds they indulged in assumptions perhaps due to inexperience, workload, prejudice or indeed laziness. I suspect it was a combination of all these factors.
Having known Steven Port, he was just an idiot with the charisma of an empty baked bean can. With regard to his initial interview with the police they didn't see what was before them because they had formed a whole array of assumptions. Had they we would not have had a second victim, and seemingly they were missing a toxicology report for weeks, that may have helped the investigation.
The second victim we didn't seem to have any investigation.
The third victim was discovered by the same poor dog walker, that was a shocker! The drama ramped up here with the police officer inferring how all gay men live their lives rather than doing their jobs properly. The suicide note was clearly not written by the victim and yet nothing was done!
Of course what is incredulous is the absence of proper forensic evidence throughout.
The forth victim should just never have happened and never was their more gross police incompetence, all carried forward from the previous botched investigations.
Overall this was an extremely well done drama, well written and well acted, when so much of the detail is repeated and so similar it is difficult to keep the narrative impetus. Whilst depressingly familiar it was a story desperate to be told. I'm giving this a firm 8 outta 10.
Patrick Melrose (2018)
Painfully Slow And Repetitive In Parts
Patrick Melrose
The whole thing was frightfully slow
Benedict turned out a complex characterisation of a spoilt aristocrat son, devoid of apparently any redeeming features. Episode 1 confined itself to Patrick finding his own way of dealing with his father's demise using every illegal substance known to man. Benedict specialises in the awkward, weird and over the top, so he was quite rightly in his element.
Episode 2, the event of cold turkey and delirium we explored Patrick's complicated relationship with his sadistic father, expertly played by Hugo Weaving.
In episode 3 we had a stuffy party and Patrick seemed to have arrived at the moment to face some demons.
In episode 4 we had moved on a number of years and despite his best efforts many of his father's traits manifested in Patrick's behaviour, he barely kept the show on the road.
Having watched the lot it was good not great, the pacing was just far too slow and we were three hours in before we had a grip on where the story was going. Benedict seemed to employ a method style throughout when really the script was so well written he could have done less for greater effect. Some of the other cast members were not so strong, the mother was poorly played etc. The camerawork was brilliant but it seemed often to be looking at the wrong thing!
Overall, it was a 7 outta 10, it was just far to slow and to many scenes were repetitive, we had no clear answer why everyone was complicit when I would have told everyone and the police would have been called.
Young Royals (2021)
It Was Perhaps The Worst Teen Drama I Have Ever Seen!
Young Royals
Watched the lot!
Despite the title it wasn't really so much about anyone Royal but a teen drama that sought to introduce one strange contrived dilemma after another.
One thing I find that really grinds my gears is the idea that Royalty are privileged wealthy people who live in their own world and clearly do not know what goes on in ordinary people's lives, is worth commenting on at all, this is exactly what they are and I expect them to be. To have a royal family, whilst seemingly anachronistic in 2024 is the most settled form of constitution, they are figure heads above politics and believe me it works, and nearly every country that has a royal family seem to be the object of admiration across the world.
The overall story was so lightweight, crown prince goes to school and lives through his teenage years, that's it!
I must say come episode 4 series 1 I was getting bored, script was banal, the acting wooden, the romance stilted, the issues superficial. And the suggestion that personal indulgence should come before duty is absolutely, absolutely absurd.
I must add did you see the terrible food, pasta and boiled vegetables and the salad looked like it had died a death!
I have tried to identify why this really was banal rubbish, beyond the excruciating script that had me squirming half the time. It was the stiff acting of the Crown Prince who really couldn't act his way out of a paper bag when much of the show rested upon him, and constant storming in and out over nothing. Lastly they all seemed determined to destroy the school they attended, talk about selfishness.
At best this dross is a 2 outta 10 the two actor that played Simon and August were good. It is difficult to know who this was made for as I didn't know anyone who watched that could identify with any of the issues, at least with Red, White and Royal Blue was a comedy but here they were all miserable all of the time.