Avengers: Infinity War (2018)
Tom Holland: Peter Parker, Spider-Man
Photos
Quotes
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Peter Parker : [while teleporting and beating up Thanos] Magic. More Magic. Magic with a Kick. Mag...
[Thanos graps Peter by the throat]
Thanos : Insect!
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Peter Parker : Let me just say, if aliens wind up implanting eggs in my chest or something and I eat one of you, I'm sorry.
Tony Stark : I don't want another single pop culture reference out of you for the rest of the trip. You understand?
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Tony Stark : [to the Guardians] We gotta coalesce. Because if all we come out is with a plucky attitude
Peter Quill : Dude, don't call us plucky. We don't know what it means. We're more optimistic, yes. I like your plan. Except, it sucks. So let me do the plan and that way it might be really good.
Drax : Tell him about the dance-off to save the Universe.
Tony Stark : What dance-off?
Peter Quill : It's not a thing.
Peter Parker : Like in Footloose, the movie?
Peter Quill : Exactly like Footloose. Is it still the greatest movie in history?
Peter Parker : It never was.
Tony Stark : Don't encourage this, all right? We're getting no help from Flash Gordon here.
Peter Quill : Flash Gordon? That's a compliment. Don't forget, I'm half human. So that 50% of me that's stupid that's 100% you.
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Peter Parker : I don't feel so good Mr. Stark.
[Looking at his hands]
Tony Stark : You're alright.
[Eye widening]
Peter Parker : I don't want to go, please, I don't want to go Mr. Stark. I am sorry, tony, I am sorry.
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Peter Quill : Wait, who are you?
Peter Parker : We're the Avengers, man.
Mantis : You're the ones Thor told us about.
Tony Stark : You know Thor?
Peter Quill : Yeah, tall guy, not that good-looking, needed saving.
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Dr. Stephen Strange : We gotta turn this ship around.
Tony Stark : Yeah, now he wants to run. Great plan.
Dr. Stephen Strange : No, I want to protect the stone.
Tony Stark : And I want you to thank me. Now, go ahead. I'm listening.
Dr. Stephen Strange : For what? Nearly blasting me into space?
Tony Stark : Who just saved your magical ass? Me.
Dr. Stephen Strange : I seriously don't know how you fit your head into that helmet.
Tony Stark : Admit it, you should've ducked out when I told you to. I tried to bench you. You refused.
Dr. Stephen Strange : Unlike everyone else in your life, I don't work for you.
Tony Stark : And due to that fact, we're now in a flying doughnut billions of miles from Earth with no backup.
Peter Parker : I'm backup.
Tony Stark : No, you're a stowaway. The adults are talking.
Dr. Stephen Strange : I'm sorry, I'm confused as to the relationship here. What is he, your ward?
Peter Parker : No. I'm Peter, by the way.
Dr. Stephen Strange : Doctor Strange.
Peter Parker : Oh, you're using made-up names. Um... I'm Spider-Man, then.
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Peter Parker : [catches Mantis] I got you!
[catches Drax]
Peter Parker : I got you! Sorry, I can't remember anybody's names.
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Peter Parker : [Peter saves Tony from getting crushed by Obsidion] Hey, man! What's up, Mr Stark?
Tony Stark : Kid, where'd you come from?
Peter Parker : Field trip to MoMa!
[gets thrown by Cull Obsidian]
Peter Parker : Uh, what is this guy's problem, Mr. Stark?
Tony Stark : Uh, he's from space, he came here to steal a necklace from a wizard.
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Peter Parker : [on a school bus] Hey, I need you to cause a distraction.
Ned : [sees the spaceship] Holy shit. WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!
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Peter Parker : You can't be a friendly neighborhood Spider-Man if there's no neighborhood.
[pause]
Peter Parker : Okay, that didn't really make sense, but you know what I'm trying to say.
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Peter Parker : [sees Mantis] Whoa, whoa, whoa, please don't put your eggs in me!
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[from trailer, Spider-Man is down]
Peter Parker : Tony, I'm sorry... I'm sorry.
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Peter Quill : What the hell happened to this planet? Eight degrees off its axis, gravitational pull is all over the place.
Tony Stark : Yeah. We got one advantage, he's coming to us. We'll use it. Alright I have a plan. It's pretty simple: we'll draw him in, pin him down, get what we need. Definitely don't wanna dance with this guy, we just want the gauntlet.
[to Drax]
Tony Stark : Are you yawning? In the middle of this, while I'm breaking it down? Huh? Did you hear what I said?
Drax : I stopped listening after you said "We need a plan"
Peter Quill : See, not winging it isn't really what they do.
Peter Parker : [Referring to Drax and Mantis] Uh, what exactly is it that they do?
Mantis : Kick names, take ass.
Drax : Yeah, that's right.
Tony Stark : [long pause] Alright. Just get over here, please? Mr Lord, can you get your folks to circle up?
Peter Quill : "Mr Lord", Star Lord is fine.
Tony Stark : We've gotta coalesce. Cause if all we come out with is a plucky attitude...
Peter Quill : Dude! Don't call us plucky. We don't know what it means. Alright, we're optimistic, yes. I like your plan, except it sucks. So let me do the plan, and that way it might be really good.
Drax : Tell him about the dance off to save the universe.
Tony Stark : What dance off?
Peter Quill : It's not a... it's not a... it...
Peter Parker : Like in Footloose the movie?
Peter Quill : Exactly like Footloose. Is it still the greatest movie in history?
Peter Parker : It never was.
Tony Stark : Don't encourage this, alright. We're getting no help from "Flash Gordon"...
Peter Quill : "Flash Gordon", by the way, that's a compliment. Don't forget I'm half human so that 50% of me that's stupid, that's a 100% you.
Tony Stark : Your math is blowing my mind
Mantis : Excuse me, but does your friend often do that?
Tony Stark : Strange? You alright?
Tony Stark : You're back here.
Peter Parker : Hey, what was that?
Dr. Stephen Strange : I went forward in time. To view alternate futures. To see all the possible outcomes of the coming conflict.
Peter Quill : How many did you see?
Dr. Stephen Strange : Fourteen million, six hundred and five.
Tony Stark : How many did we win?
Dr. Stephen Strange : One.
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Peter Parker : [Hanging on outside of the Q-ship in Space] Oh My God! I should've stayed on the bus!
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Dr. Stephen Strange : Tony... there was no other way.
[turns into dust and blows away]
Peter Parker : Mr. Stark? I don't feel so good.
[looking at his hands]
Tony Stark : You're all right.
Peter Parker : I don't-I don't know what's happening. I don't... Save me, save me!
[falls toward Tony Stark and holds onto him, begins to cry]
Peter Parker : I don't want to go. I don't want to go, Mr. Stark. Please. Please, I don't want to go. I don't want to go...
[falls onto ground with Tony beside him]
Peter Parker : I'm sorry...
[turns into dust and blows away]
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Peter Quill : [Pointing guns at Stark and Parker] Everybody stay where you are, chill the eff out!
[to Iron Man]
Peter Quill : I'm gonna ask you this one time: where is Gamora?
Tony Stark : Yeah, I'll do you one better: WHO'S Gamora?
Drax : I'll do YOU one better: WHY is Gamora?
Peter Quill : Tell me where the girl is, or I swear to you, I'm gonna french-fry this little freak!
[puts his gun to Spider-Man's head]
Tony Stark : Let's do it! You shoot my guy and I'll blast him! Let's go!
[points his blaster in Drax's face]
Drax : Do it, Quill! I can take it.
Mantis : No, he can't take it!
Dr. Stephen Strange : She's right, you can't.
Peter Quill : Oh yeah? You don't wanna tell me where she is? That's fine, I'll kill all three of you and I'll beat it out of Thanos myself!
[to Spider-Man]
Peter Quill : Starting with you!
Dr. Stephen Strange : Wait, what? Thanos? Alright, let me ask you this one time: what master do you serve?
Peter Quill : What master do I serve? What am I supposed to say, Jesus?
Tony Stark : You're from Earth?
Peter Quill : I'm not from Earth, I'm from Missouri.
Tony Stark : Yeah, that's on EARTH, dipshit. What're you hassling us for?
Peter Parker : So you're not with Thanos?
Peter Quill : [incredulous] "With Thanos?" No! I'm here to kill Thanos! He took my girl -- wait, who are you?
Peter Parker : [retracts his helmet] We're the Avengers, man.
Mantis : You're the ones Thor told us about!
Tony Stark : You know Thor?
Peter Quill : Yeah. Tall guy, not that good-looking, needed saving.
Dr. Stephen Strange : Where is he now?
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Tony Stark : Wow. You are a seriously loyal piece of hardware.
Peter Parker : Yeah, Speaking of loyalty...
[Tony Stark turns to Peter Parker]
Peter Parker : I know what you're gonna say to me.
Tony Stark : You should not be here.
Peter Parker : I was gonna go home.
Tony Stark : I don't want to hear it.
Peter Parker : But it was such a long way down and I just thought about...
Tony Stark : And now, I gotta hear it.
Peter Parker : And this suit is, ridiculously intuitive, by the way. So, if anything, its kind of your fault that I'm here.
Tony Stark : What did you just say?
Peter Parker : I take that back.
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Tony Stark : Come on. We got a situation. See him down there? He's in trouble. What's your plan? Go.
Peter Parker : Um. Okay, okay... uh... Okay. Did you ever see this really old movie, Aliens?
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Iron Man : [seeing Doctor Strange fly by] Kid, that's the wizard. Get on it.
Spider-Man : On it!
[Spider-Man swings after Doctor Strange, who is also being chased by Ebony Maw. Ebony Maw uses his powers to throw a billboard at Spider-Man, knocking him down, but he recovers]
Spider-Man : Not cool.
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Tony Stark : Yeah, we got one advantage. He's coming to us. We use it. Alright, I have a plan. At least the beginnings of one. It's pretty simple. We draw him in, pin him down, get what we need. Definitely don't want to dance with this guy, we just want the gauntlet.
[Drax yawns]
Tony Stark : Are you yawning? In the middle of this, while I'm breaking it down? Huh? Did you hear what I said?
Drax : I stopped listening after you said we need a plan.
Tony Stark : Okay, Mr. Clean's on his own page.
Peter Quill : See, not winging it isn't really what they do.
Peter Parker : Uh, what exactly is it that they do?
Mantis : Kick names, take ass.
Drax : Yeah, that's right.
Tony Stark : All right, just get over here, please? Mr. Lord, can you get your folks to circle up?
Peter Quill : Mr. Lord... Star-Lord is fine.
Tony Stark : We've gotta coalesce. Because if all we come at him with is a plucky attitude...
Peter Quill : Dude, don't call us plucky. We don't know what it means. All right, we're optimistic, yes. I like your plan, except it sucks. So let me do the plan, and that way, it might be really good.
Drax : Tell him about the dance-off to save the Universe.
Tony Stark : What dance-off?
Peter Quill : It's not a, it's not a, it's not a...
Peter Parker : Like in Footloose? The movie?
Peter Quill : Exactly like Footloose! Is it still the greatest movie in history?
Peter Parker : It never was.
Tony Stark : Don't encourage this alright? We're getting no help from Flash Gordon.
Peter Quill : Flash Gordon? By the way, that's a compliment. Don't forget, I'm half-human. So that's 50% of me that's stupid, and that's 100% you.
Tony Stark : Your math is blowing my mind.
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Spider-Man : [saving Iron Man from Cull Obsidian] Hey, man. What's up, Mr. Stark?
Iron Man : Kid, where'd you come from?
Spider-Man : A field trip to MoMA.
[Cull Obsidian grabs Spider-Man and throws him away, but he swings back in]
Spider-Man : Uh, what is this guy's problem, Mr. Stark?
Iron Man : Uh, he's from space. He came here to steal a necklace from a wizard.
[Cull Obsidian grabs Spider-Man in his chain-hammer and swings him around before throwing him away. He then throws a taxi at Iron Man, but he dodges. Spider-Man snags the taxi with his webbing and slams it right on top of Cull Obsidian]
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Iron Man : [after subduing Thanos] Is he under? Don't let up.
Mantis : Be quick. He is very strong.
Iron Man : Parker, help. Get over here. She can't hold him much longer. Let's go.
[they start to pull the Gauntlet off]
Spider-Man : We gotta open his fingers to get it off.
Star-Lord : [flies down in front of Thanos] I thought you'd be harder to catch. By the way, this was my plan. Not so strong now, huh? Where is Gamora?
Thanos : [weakly] M-My Gamora.
Star-Lord : Oh, bullshit. Where is she?
Mantis : He is in anguish.
Star-Lord : Good.
Mantis : He... he mourns.
Drax : What does this monster have to mourn?
Nebula : Gamora.
Star-Lord : What?
Nebula : He took her to Vormir. He came back with the Soul Stone. But she didn't.
Iron Man : [as Quill turns to face Thanos] Okay, Quill, you gotta cool it right now. You understand? Don't, don't, don't engage. We almost got this off!
Star-Lord : [to Thanos] Tell me she's lying. Asshole, tell me you didn't do it!
Thanos : I had to.
Star-Lord : No, you didn't. No, you didn't.
[whips out his blaster and starts punching Thanos]
Star-Lord : NO, YOU DIDN'T!
Iron Man : [lunging onto Star-Lord] Quill! Hey, stop! Hey, stop, stop!
Spider-Man : [pulling the Gauntlet free] It's coming, it's coming, it's coming! I got it! I got it!
[Thanos opens his and pulls the Gauntlet back on. He then blasts the heroes back. He throws Mantis off his shoulders]
Spider-Man : Oh, God.
[he leaps up and catches Mantis. He uses his spider-legs to cushion their fall]
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Peter Parker : Uhh, Mr. Stark? I'm being beamed up!
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Spider-Man : [after arriving on Titan] Let me just say, if aliens wind up implanting eggs in my chest, or something and I eat one of you, I'm sorry.
Iron Man : I do not want another single pop culture reference out of you for the rest of the trip. Do you understand?
Spider-Man : I'm trying to say that something is coming.
[a grenade rolls across the floor toward the trio. It explodes, knocking them backwards. Dr. Strange looks up to see Star-Lord, Drax, and Mantis enter the ship through a hole]
Drax : Thanos!
[throws his knives at Dr. Strange, who conjures a magic shield to stop them. Drax yells and tries to charge, but the Cloak of Levitation wraps itself around Drax's face, tackling him to the ground. Star-Lord flies up while firing at Iron Man. Iron Man fires back while rocketing upward as well. He fires a rocket at Star-Lord, who dodges, but the explosion throws him backward. Iron Man grabs him and throws him to the deck. Star-Lord activates a device he had attached to Iron Man's chest, which pulls him toward the wall and sticks him there. Spider-Man wakes up to find Mantis standing in front of him]
Spider-Man : Whoa, whoa, whoa! Please don't put your eggs in me!
[webs her up, but before he can do any more, Star-Lord comes flying in and kicks him aside]
Star-Lord : Stay down, clown.
[Star-Lord fires his blasters at Spider-Man, who leaps into the rafters and dodges the blasts. He lands on the ground and tries to leap toward Star-Lord, but Star-Lord throws a electrical bola at him, sending him tumbling to the ground]
Drax : [wrestling with the Cloak of Levitation] Die, blanket of death!
[Iron Man frees himself from the wall, flies over to Drax, and pins him under his boot while the Cloak of Levitation flies back to Dr. Strange]
Star-Lord : [holding Spider-Man in a headlock] Everybody, stay where you are. Chill the F out.
[he retracts his helmet]
Star-Lord : I'm gonna ask you this one time. Where is Gamora?
Iron Man : Yeah, I'll do you one better. Who is Gamora?
Drax : I'll do *you* one better. Why is Gamora?
Star-Lord : Tell me where the girl is, or I swear to you I'm gonna French fry this little freak.
Iron Man : Let's do it. You shoot my guy and I'll blast him. Let's go!
[aims his arm cannon at Drax]
Drax : Do it, Quill! I can take it.
Mantis : No, he can't take it!
Doctor Strange : She's right. He can't.
Star-Lord : Oh, yeah? You don't wanna tell me where she is? That's fine. I'll kill all three of you and I'll beat it out of Thanos myself.
[to Spider-Man]
Star-Lord : Starting with you.
Doctor Strange : Wait, what, Thanos? Alright, let me ask you this one time. What master do you serve?
Star-Lord : What master do I serve? What am I supposed to say, Jesus?
Iron Man : You're from Earth.
Star-Lord : I'm not from Earth, I'm from Missouri.
Iron Man : Yeah, that's on Earth, dipshit. What are you hassling us for?
Spider-Man : So you're not with Thanos?
Star-Lord : *With* Thanos? No, I'm here to kill Thanos. He took my girl. Wait, who are you?
Spider-Man : [retracts his mask] We're the Avengers, man.
[Star-Lord releases him]
Mantis : You're the ones Thor told us about.
Iron Man : You know Thor?
Star-Lord : Yeah. Tall guy, not that good-looking, needed saving.
Doctor Strange : Where is he now?
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Ebony Maw : [facing Iron Man] Your powers are inconsequential compared to mine.
Iron Man : Yeah, but the kid's seen more movies.
[he fires a rocket into the wall, blasting it open. Ebony Maw is instantly sucked out into space. Strange also starts to sucked out. The Cloak of Levitation tries to save him, but he slips out of its grip. Spider-Man shoots a web-line out and tries to pull Strange up, but the piece of metal that he's holding onto breaks. As they're being pulled toward the hole, Spider-Man's armor deploys artificial spider-legs and keeps them from falling out]
Spider-Man : Yes! Wait, what are those?
[he pulls Strange back in while Iron Man seals the hole. Ebony Maw's body drifts away into space]
Spider-Man : [extends his hand to the Cloak of Levitation] Hey, we haven't officially met.
[the Cloak looks at him and then flies back to Strange]
Spider-Man : Cool.
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Peter Parker : [Tony saves Peter by sending him the 17:A suit from the Avengers Heartquarters to space] Mr. Stark, it smells like a new car in here!
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Iron Man : [trying to come up with a plan] We're getting no help from Flash Gordon here.
Star-Lord : Flash Gordon? By the way, that's a complement. Don't forget I'm half human. So that's fifty percent of me that's stupid, that's one hundred percent of you.
Iron Man : Your math is blowing my mind.
Mantis : Excuse me, but does your friend often do that?
[Strange is sitting cross-legged in midair, using the Time Stone's power. Tony runs up to him as he collapses]
Iron Man : Strange? We all right? You're back. You're alright.
Spider-Man : Hey, what was that?
Doctor Strange : I went forward in time to view alternate futures. To see all the possible outcomes of the coming conflict.
Star-Lord : How many did you see?
Doctor Strange : Fourteen million, six hundred and five.
Iron Man : How many did we win?
[long beat]
Doctor Strange : One.
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Spider-Man : [attacking Thanos through a series of portals] Magic! More magic! Magic with a kick! Magic with a...
[Thanos grabs him and slams him to the ground]
Thanos : Insect!
[throws him into Doctor Strange]
