Supernatural (TV Series)

Fan Fiction (2014)

Jensen Ackles: Dean Winchester

Photos 

Quotes 

• Dean Winchester : [Pointing to the actors portraying Dean and Castiel]  What are they doing?

  Marie : Ummm. Kids these days call it hugging.

  Dean Winchester : Is that in the show?

  Marie : Oh. No. Siobhan and Kristen are a couple in real life. Although we do explore the nature of Destiel in act two.

  Dean Winchester : Sorry. What?

  Marie : Oh, it's just subtext. But... then again, you know, you can't spell subtext without... S-E-X.

  [after that sinks in, Dean looks hard into the camera, breaking the fourth wall] 

• Sam Winchester : I don't understand.

  Dean Winchester : Me neither.

  Sam Winchester : I mean, shouldn't it be *Dea*stiel?

  Dean Winchester : Really? That's your issue with this?

  Sam Winchester : No. Of course, it's not my issue. You know... how about... Sastiel? Samstiel?

  Dean Winchester : Okay. Alright. You know what? You're gonna do that thing... where you just shut the hell up. Forever.

  Sam Winchester : [Chuckles, then...]  Look. Man, no EMF, no hex bags. None of the props are even remotely hinky. Other than the Charlie Kaufman of it all, I got nothin'. You?

  Dean Winchester : No, Miss Chandler's office was just a pile of empty bottles and regret. She's probably face down in a bar somewhere. Or a ditch. Alright, so what? This, this whole... this whole musical thing, everything, it's just... is it... It's all a coincidence? There is no case?

  Sam Winchester : Unless you're seein' somethin' I'm not. No, Dean, there's no case here.

  Dean Winchester : [Upset, but resigned to Sam's logic]  Okay.

  [He walks around the car to get in while Sam gets a thoughtful look on his face] 

  Sam Winchester : [Turns to Dean as a thought occurs]  Casdean?

  Dean Winchester : Shut your face! Get in the car!

• Dean Winchester : [Pointing to the two girls playing Sam and Dean, leaning against the car]  What are they doin'?

  Marie : Oh, uh... they're rehearsing the BM scene.

  Dean Winchester : The bowel movement scene?

  Marie : No! The boy melodrama scene.

  [At his confused look] 

  Marie : You know, the scene where the boys get together, and they're, they're driving or leaning against Baby... drinking a beer... sharing their feelings...

  [Her voice softens] 

  Marie : The two of them. Alone. But together. Bonded. United. The power of their...

  Dean Winchester : Why are they standing so close together?

  Marie : Uh... reasons.

  Dean Winchester : You know they're *brothers*... right?

  Marie : Well, duh. But... subtext.

  Dean Winchester : [to the two actors in his menacing voice]  Why don't you take a sub step back there, ladies?

• Dean Winchester : [Deeply insulted]  There is no singing in Supernatural.

  Maeve : Well, this is Marie's interpretation...

  Dean Winchester : Aha! Well... I mean, if there was singing, you know, and that's a big if. *If* there was singing, it would be classic rock! Not this... Andrew Floyd Webber *crap*!

  Sam Winchester : [Under his breath to Dean]  Andrew Lloyd Webber.

  Dean Winchester : What?

  Marie : [Proudly]  Well, you know, we do sing a cover of Carry On Wayward Son in the second act.

  Dean Winchester : [Only slightly mollified]  Oh.

  Sam Winchester : Really?

  Dean Winchester , Marie : [to Sam in unison]  It's a classic!

• Sam Winchester : I was a theater kid.

  Dean Winchester : Barely. You did "Our Town", which was cool, but then you did that crappy musical.

  Sam Winchester : That - "Oklahoma"? Hugh Jackman got cast off "Oklahoma".

  Dean Winchester : You ran tech, Wolverine.

• Dean Winchester : You want to piñata this asshat?

  Marie : "Asshat"? Nice. It's, uh, very Dean.

• Dean Winchester : I'm gonna throw up.

  Sam Winchester : [Looking around, smiling, charmed with the high school atmosphere]  I mean, I gotta say, it's kinda charming. The, the production value and the at-

  [Turning back to Dean and the stone cold look on his face] 

  Sam Winchester : No? N- no.

  [Clears his throat and plasters a serious, disapproving look on his own face] 

  Sam Winchester : I'm gonna check for EMF. You, you... look for, uh, cursed objects.

• Marie : [Referring to the missing drama teacher]  She had a nasty divorce last year. Most of the time she's sipping on her, uh... grown up juice, or passed out. Usually in that order.

  Dean Winchester : Yeah, well, I don't blame her. I'm gonna need 50 jello shots and a hose down to get this stink off me.

  [Surprised when Maeve makes a threatening move toward him] 

• Sam Winchester : [Unsettled after seeing two actors portraying them and showing fake FBI badges]  I'm, uh, Special Agent Smith. This is my partner, Special Agent...

  Dean Winchester : Smith.

  Sam Winchester : Smith. No relation.

• Dean Winchester : There is no space in "Supernatural."

  Marie : Well, not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.

  Dean Winchester : You mean fan fiction.

  Marie : Call it whatever you like, okay? It's inspired by Carver Edlund's books... with a few embellishments.

• Dean Winchester : Sam. Out there, hunting. It's the only normal I know.

  [POV from Baby's trunk, reminiscent of a similar scene in the Supernatural pilot] 

  Dean Winchester : We got work to do.

  [Dean drops the shot gun inside and closes the trunk lid] 

• Dean Winchester : Tonight it is all about Marie's vision. This is Marie's "Supernatural." So I want you to get out there, and I want you to stand as close as she wants you to, and I want you to put as much sub into that text as you possibly can. There is no other road, no other way, no day... but today.

  Maeve : [Whispers]  Did he just quote "Rent"?

  Marie : Not enough to get us in trouble.

• Dean Winchester : Alright, Shakespeare. You know that I can actually tell you what really happened with Sam and Dean. A friend of mine hooked me up with the unpublished-unpublished books. So, Sam came back from Hell, but without his soul, and Cas brought in a bunch of Leviathans from Purgatory. They lost Bobby, and then Cas and Dean got stuck in Purgatory... Sam hit a dog. Uh, they met a prophet named Kevin; they lost him too. Then Sam underwent a series of trials in an attempt to close the Gates of Hell, which nearly cost him his life. And Dean... he became a demon.

  [Slightly proudly] 

  Dean Winchester : A Knight of Hell actually.

  Marie : Wow.

  Dean Winchester : Yup.

  Marie : [laughing]  That is some of the worst fan-fiction I have ever heard. I mean, seriously, where did your friend find this garbage? And not saying that ours is a masterpiece or anything, but jeez. I'll have to send you some links later.

• Dean Winchester : All right, listen up, girls, now, I know you're all here because you love "Supernatural".

  Tammy : Actually, I was hoping we'd do "Wicked."

  Dean Winchester : Yeah, that'd have been easier.

• Marie : As you know, Chuck stopped writing after "Swan Song." I just... I couldn't leave it the way that it was. I mean, Dean not hunting anymore, Living with *Lisa*, Sam somehow back from Hell but not with Dean? So, um, I wrote my own ending.

  Dean Winchester : You wrote your own ending... with...

  [Holds up prop] 

  Dean Winchester : Spaceships?

  Marie : And robots and some ninjas. And then Dean becomes a woman.

  [Dean makes a face] 

  Marie : It-- it's just for a few scenes.

• Sam Winchester : [Looking at actors]  Where's Chuck?

  Marie : Oh, I love him. I do. But, honestly, the whole "author inserting themselves into the narrative" thing, it's just not my favorite. I kind of hate the meta stories.

  Sam Winchester , Dean Winchester : Me too.

• Sam Winchester : Calliope manifests creatures from the stories she's tuned into.

  Marie : So... The scarecrow is still alive and we burned my prop for NOTHING?

  Dean Winchester : Oh, that thing needed to burn.

• Marie : [about the "Samulet"]  You never should've thrown this away.

  Dean Winchester : It never really worked. I don't need a symbol to remind me how I feel about my brother. So..

  Marie : Just take it... Jerk.

  Dean Winchester : Bitch.

• Sam Winchester : [Watching play]  What is that?

  Dean Winchester : It's the, uh, the B.M. scene.

  Sam Winchester : [Confused]  Bowel-movement scene?

  Dean Winchester : No. Just... Shh.

• Dean Winchester : You know, this has been... Educational... Seeing the story from your perspective. You keep writing, Shakespeare.

  Marie : Even if it doesn't match how you see it?

  Dean Winchester : I have my version, and you have yours.

• Dean Winchester : A teacher at an all-girls school went missing in Flint, Michigan. She was headed to her car and then disappeared. Nobody's seen her since.

  Sam Winchester : Dean, there's nothing here to even remotely suggest there's a case.

  Dean Winchester : There is nothing there that even remotely suggests there *isn't* a case. Boom!

• Dean Winchester : We came, we saw, we kicked-...

  Sam Winchester : It's not a Tulpa.

  Dean Winchester : What?

  Sam Winchester : It's not a Tulpa.

  Dean Winchester : Say it one more time, but just a little bit more Arnold, you know, like...

  [Does an Arnold Schwarzenegger voice] 

  Dean Winchester : It's not a Tul-pa.

• Sam Winchester : lt's not like the "Supernatural" books are tearing up the New York Times best-seller list, and I seriously doubt this play is even sold out.

  Dean Winchester : Hope not.