- Bob Bolaño: They have something called a Blue Lagoon here. It's a hot spa. It's outdoors.
- Terry Monroe: It's probably full of sweaty Europeans with bad teeth fucking each other. You'd be swimming around in jizz. European jizz. That's one of the first movies I ever saw, actually.
- Bob Bolaño: European Jizz?
- Terry Monroe: The Blue Lagoon.
- Terry Monroe: Hey Bob, what's the plan for finding Reggie? It's going to be tough tracking him down without anything to go on. Isn't it?
- Bob Bolaño: Well, he's black. How many fucking black people do you think there are in Iceland? We'll just stand around here and keep our eyes open.
- Terry Monroe: That's not much of a plan, Bob. You don't think we should...
- Bob Bolaño: There he is.
- Lord James Mangan: How much is this going to cost me?
- Bob Bolaño: It's going to cost you your life.
- Lord James Mangan: Nice line.
- [first lines]
- Bob Bolaño: I've always wondered if you hit a mime, does he make a sound?
- Terry Monroe: [mime thuds and rolls over their car] Well, now you know.
- Bob Bolaño: I've never killed anybody before.
- Terry Monroe: Well neither have I.
- Bob Bolaño: You know what they say - always be open to new experiences.
- Bob Bolaño: D'you think it is easy looking after a kid? I mean I got two of 'em and it's not easy let me tell you. I mean yeah, OK I love 'em but I gotta feed 'em 24hrs a day. Those little fat *^"&s... it's hard work!
- Bob Bolaño: He called me a 'wet back'! He knows damn well I was born here. He is a big fat racist pig is what he is.
- Bob Bolaño: Why don't we just throw him off the roof?
- Terry Monroe: Huh?
- Bob Bolaño: I'm kidding. It's a bad joke.
- Lord James Mangan: You know what the worst thing about jail is?
- Birdwell: No, your Lorship. I do not.
- Lord James Mangan: The violent anal sex. Do you know what the best thing about jail is, Russell?
- Birdwell: The violent anal sex?
- Lord James Mangan: You know, you're pretty quick for an American.
- Terry Monroe: [to Swat after they use excessive force on some defenceless criminals] Well... at least this time they were white
- Terry Monroe: [Chasing someone while beating his arms like wings] Oh no... come back here you little bastard
- Bob Bolaño: I guess some people's ambitions go beyond selling toasters, you know?
- Reggie X: Okay, you know what? You don't even know the whole level I'm on. These were designer fucking stolen toasters.
- Bob Bolaño: Oh, oh.
- Reggie X: Yes, yes. This big fucking shit, man. Moschino, shit like that.
- Bob Bolaño: Oh, fancy shit.
- Reggie X: Yeah, fancy fucking shit, yeah!
- Bob Bolaño: Okay, okay.
- Reggie X: Moschino shit, man!
- Terry Monroe: Moschino made fucking toasters?
- Delores Bolaño: "All oppression creates a state of war." Simone de Beauvoir.
- Bob Bolaño: No, it's Pierre-Joseph Proudhon, the father of anarchism. It's not Simone de Beauvoir, the feminist existentialist. I'll bet you 50 bucks.
- Delores Bolaño: I'll take that bet.
- Lt. Gerry Stanton: Welcome back boys. How did we enjoy our sabbatical?
- Bob Bolaño: It was very pleasant. It was very relaxing. I masturbated a lot.
- Lt. Gerry Stanton: Enforced sabbatical, I should have said.
- Terry Monroe: What's a sabbatical?
- Lt. Gerry Stanton: Okay. So, Laurel and Hardy here, huh? Tweedledum and Tweedledee.
- Bob Bolaño: Siegfried and Roy. Sacco and Vanzetti. Abelard and Heloise.
- Terry Monroe: Is this a quiz?
- Lt. Gerry Stanton: No, it's not a quiz. This is your last chance, okay?
- Lt. Gerry Stanton: You'd be out on your asses already, frankly, if the powers-that-be could prove some of the rumours I've been hearing.
- Bob Bolaño: Yeah, but you know what they say about rumours, though.
- Terry Monroe: Rumours are the mothers of invention.
- Lt. Gerry Stanton: No, *necessity's* the mother of invention.