We Dutch have a rich history of making movies with that typical 'Dutch mark'. Something that's hard to identify but somehow always involves nudity, swearing, a bit wooden acting and a sense of humor that is very much Dutch. Lacking budgets of, say Hollywood, Dutch cinema always has fairly low production values. Even compared to British, Scandinavian or French movies, Dutch movies alway fall short of outstanding quality. Which, even for me as a Dutchman, makes them hard to like.
Sometimes you need to give them a chance however. And with 'De Poel' (The Pond) being somewhat of a revival of the 'Nether-Horror' genre I thought I'd put my prejudice aside and give it a try. Dutch media outlets praise the movie, but to me (and I guess my fellow movie goers in the cinema) it failed miserably.
'De Poel' follows two families going on a camping vacation in a forbidden part of a Dutch nature reserve. They set up camp next to a pond, and sure enough: s--- hits the fan. The build up of tension is decent, and the main actors (the younger actors barely have any lines to work with) act quite naturally which is a relief for a Dutch movie. The tension between husband and wife is actually quite enjoyable. Mom blaming dad for being stubborn and relying on technological 'toys' instead of a good old analogue compass is fun and recognizable. There are some nice scenic shots too. That's where the goods end.
'De Poel' fails to be scary. Overly stylized shots from the perspective of 'the threat' distract and only serve to reinforce something is wrong...again, and again, and again. There is some gore, including cutting off a finger. Which is followed by the character almost ignoring his missing finger just an hour later... The story doesn't explain anything, and only barely hints at the cause of the trouble.
The Netherlands has a history of prehistoric human sacrifices in bogs and marshes which this movie hints at, but never fully embraces. There's something about the virginity of 'the sacrifice' which made me fear they would actually go as far as having an awkward forced sex scene to prevent that sacrifice from happening...luckily 'De Poel' doesn't take it there. Instead: 'De Poel' simply becomes a snore fest best to be ignored completely.
During my screening the crowd would laugh at the movie all the time, would critique it all the time and everybody walked out saying "what a terrible movie." The worst thing is 'De Poel' had potential, but in the end feels like something a film school graduate should be proud of. Nothing cinema worthy. And to be quite frank: nothing worth your time and money. So once again: Dutch cinema fails to impress and falls flat on its face.
