C: 299, 792 Kilometers Per Second

I guess on one level the film deserves credit for its old school sci-fi aesthetics which deliver this space adventure with neon lights, a score of discoesque music and is done using no CGI but rather models and sets for everything. So, for that it is nicely done but for a film to be carried entirely by its style and design, it needs to do it really well and also have nothing else that detracts from it. Unfortunately in this case neither of those boxes are ticked because although the film does things well, it doesn't do it brilliantly and it does have many bigger problems.

The first is the plot. It really doesn't engage particularly and seems disconnected and unnatural in the delivery. There are ideas in here but they are not made much of but in fairness part of that may be the sheer awfulness of the acting. I have read some comments that the wooden acting is meant to be deliberate as part of recreating the old stiff age of sci-fi, but personally this just seems like nonsense to me. The idea that they would deliberately damage their own film with forcing performances to be this bad is one thing, but even if they were trying for a "style", they got it wrong because it shouldn't hurt the film. The acting is wooden throughout; dialogue is stiff and unnatural and even something like seeing a character smile in gradual realization is like watching a massive oil tanker slowly and awkwardly make a turn.

So yes, hats off for raising the money and delivering a cool retro look with models and sets, but the plot is weak and the performances are terrible – both of which totally distract from what the film does well and left me longing for it just to end (which is not a good thing for a film not even 15 minutes long. On the plus side, it is as forgettable as its title.