117 reviews
I really enjoyed this actually! Justin Long and Kate Bosworth are some seriously good actors. They really put on a show! I understand there was a ton of conversation and it's pretty fair to say this was incredibly slow. I can understand that. But sometimes slow is good. This held pretty solid build up and while it was predictable I also considered this to be a classic long stretch of tales from the crypt type of story. So I really enjoyed the aspect of that and couldn't wait to see what was going to happen. Even if I knew there was clearly something off about Mina you still don't know exactly what it may be! The ending was great and a classic! The acting was also incredibly good as expected.
- Wild-43358
- Sep 16, 2022
- Permalink
A guy goes home with an attractive woman believing he's found himself a casual hookup.
What is this? OMG. I like Justin Long but I don't want to watch him rambling, at times incoherently, for nearly 90 minutes. There's so little dialogue that all you hear is him trying to carry the whole weight of the movie on his shoulders while the rest of the cast asked stupid, repetitive questions and stares at him. It was a bit ridiculous. The story is so obvious. You know where this is heading in the first five minutes. It's not very creative or interesting.
I made it through the whole film but this just turned out to be a flop for me. It's not something that I'm gonna be hyping up.
What is this? OMG. I like Justin Long but I don't want to watch him rambling, at times incoherently, for nearly 90 minutes. There's so little dialogue that all you hear is him trying to carry the whole weight of the movie on his shoulders while the rest of the cast asked stupid, repetitive questions and stares at him. It was a bit ridiculous. The story is so obvious. You know where this is heading in the first five minutes. It's not very creative or interesting.
I made it through the whole film but this just turned out to be a flop for me. It's not something that I'm gonna be hyping up.
- Foutainoflife
- Sep 18, 2022
- Permalink
Justin Long plays a dorky guy who drives the sassy Kate Bosworth home to maybe get frisky in her big old spooky house.
The rest of the movie is a real time (yes, really) conversation that drags on and on. The extensive dialogue is cluttered, swamped with umms and ahhs and throwaway lines that the cheapest editor on Fiverr would have jettisoned immediately.
The cinematography is poor. Actors often have their eyes in shadow which subtracts from their otherwise decent performances. There is only one location, a living room, and most of the time we can barely see it. They took the title literally, it seems. Don't expect the house to play any role. It doesn't.
It's a very basic movie, essentially a one act radio play. A cliched thirty second denouement is telegraphed hard and then it's over. I can't even tell you what this movie is about because it only has one idea and it would spoil the whole thing. As a five minutes short, it would be respectable. As a movie, it's a toothless waste of time.
The rest of the movie is a real time (yes, really) conversation that drags on and on. The extensive dialogue is cluttered, swamped with umms and ahhs and throwaway lines that the cheapest editor on Fiverr would have jettisoned immediately.
The cinematography is poor. Actors often have their eyes in shadow which subtracts from their otherwise decent performances. There is only one location, a living room, and most of the time we can barely see it. They took the title literally, it seems. Don't expect the house to play any role. It doesn't.
It's a very basic movie, essentially a one act radio play. A cliched thirty second denouement is telegraphed hard and then it's over. I can't even tell you what this movie is about because it only has one idea and it would spoil the whole thing. As a five minutes short, it would be respectable. As a movie, it's a toothless waste of time.
- Victor_Fallon
- Sep 17, 2022
- Permalink
We just tried to watch this movie. Whoever wrote this dialog clearly has never interacted with real humans. 20 minutes in and Justin Long's character was so unlikeable with the ceaseless rambling that we gave up. There was zero action or anything compelling to hook someone in. This would probably be suited best as a low budget play instead of a movie. The preview to the film was intriguing but if you can't hook an audience in the first 20 min of an hour and a half film the entire script needs to be rewritten. Overall I will give this a one star for the reimagining premise but sadly cannot give it any more than that.
I would love to know the age of people who rate this film as a 1 or 2 and say comments like 'Skip it' or 'boring waste of time.' Maybe these people need to stay off their phones while watching a conversation-led film.
I live in the UK, do not work in the industry, have zilch to do with the film or trying to promote it. However, after giving it a go, regardless of the poor reviews, I thought it was really good, in fact its maybe a 7.5.
You can sort of sense from the early dialogue what path the film might take but what kept me gripped was the mystery of wondering how we were going to get there. I found the dialogue excellent. It was intriguing and the exchanges between the main characters made me drawn into the room with them.
This is not a gorefest from minute one, nor is it a bloodbath but its highly sexually charged, with dark undertones that permeate the film from very early on. The acting is top notch as well.
We're introduced to a couple who have literally just met earlier, in a bar, and the male character Hap has given Mina a lift home. They seem to like each other, and thus the dialogue/wordplay begins.
For me, it was absolutely fascinating to watch, i was riveted. Saying that, I did watch it in the dark, no interruptions, and I had headphones on and it just ramped up the creepy atmosphere.
And this film does build up. Its like a coil thats getting tighter and tighter, and even tho you 'know' whats going to happen, you still need to watch.
My only criticism would be that, after all that tension and impending doom, the end seemed to peter out a little maybe, and it ended too quickly. But, saying that, I thoroughly enjoyed it and providing you're not an impatient child, and you can listen to dialogue , and read between the lines, then hopefully you'll find it as enjoyable as I did.
I live in the UK, do not work in the industry, have zilch to do with the film or trying to promote it. However, after giving it a go, regardless of the poor reviews, I thought it was really good, in fact its maybe a 7.5.
You can sort of sense from the early dialogue what path the film might take but what kept me gripped was the mystery of wondering how we were going to get there. I found the dialogue excellent. It was intriguing and the exchanges between the main characters made me drawn into the room with them.
This is not a gorefest from minute one, nor is it a bloodbath but its highly sexually charged, with dark undertones that permeate the film from very early on. The acting is top notch as well.
We're introduced to a couple who have literally just met earlier, in a bar, and the male character Hap has given Mina a lift home. They seem to like each other, and thus the dialogue/wordplay begins.
For me, it was absolutely fascinating to watch, i was riveted. Saying that, I did watch it in the dark, no interruptions, and I had headphones on and it just ramped up the creepy atmosphere.
And this film does build up. Its like a coil thats getting tighter and tighter, and even tho you 'know' whats going to happen, you still need to watch.
My only criticism would be that, after all that tension and impending doom, the end seemed to peter out a little maybe, and it ended too quickly. But, saying that, I thoroughly enjoyed it and providing you're not an impatient child, and you can listen to dialogue , and read between the lines, then hopefully you'll find it as enjoyable as I did.
- prestonmick-975-597748
- Mar 5, 2023
- Permalink
What the heck!
Was this improvised?
It starts off fairly well, but goes absolutely nowhere. It's like the cast were just making it up as they went along.
Boring, slow, tedious and non-sensical dialogue, from start to finish.
Not even an ounce of a storyline, or plot.
Nearly 90 minutes of build-up, with the biggest anti-climax I've seen in some time.
How can someone give this the green light, then someone else make this, act in this, direct this, film this, edit this...and RELEASE THIS?
Absolutely horrible! If I had paid to watch this, I would ask for TWO refunds. Wasted my morning on this.
Justin Long and the female lead had zero chemistry. Where was the horror? 5 seconds of a woman's reflection in a mirror? I'm sorry, but the word 'horror' shouldn't be within 100 miles of this movie.
And House of 'Darkness' was the perfect title...as it's almost pitch black for 90% of the movie.
Was this improvised?
It starts off fairly well, but goes absolutely nowhere. It's like the cast were just making it up as they went along.
Boring, slow, tedious and non-sensical dialogue, from start to finish.
Not even an ounce of a storyline, or plot.
Nearly 90 minutes of build-up, with the biggest anti-climax I've seen in some time.
How can someone give this the green light, then someone else make this, act in this, direct this, film this, edit this...and RELEASE THIS?
Absolutely horrible! If I had paid to watch this, I would ask for TWO refunds. Wasted my morning on this.
Justin Long and the female lead had zero chemistry. Where was the horror? 5 seconds of a woman's reflection in a mirror? I'm sorry, but the word 'horror' shouldn't be within 100 miles of this movie.
And House of 'Darkness' was the perfect title...as it's almost pitch black for 90% of the movie.
- Go_For_The_Jugular
- Sep 13, 2022
- Permalink
I haven't really seen a horror movie like this before. It's a small cast and dialog driven. The type that could be a stage play. The writing could have been a bit better, but the acting makes up for it. Would love to see more horror movies like this!
It's in a similar vein to Big Kahuna. Justin Long and Kate Bosworth do fantastic jobs as always. The other 2 actresses I didn't recognize, but they delivered as well. Suspense is steadily built in masterful ways that keep you ready for the shoe to drop at any moment, or possibly not at all!
I'm not sure why people seemed to dislike this so much. I almost wanted to give it a 10 just to counter the unreasonable hate, but in the end I had to grade it where it was.
It's in a similar vein to Big Kahuna. Justin Long and Kate Bosworth do fantastic jobs as always. The other 2 actresses I didn't recognize, but they delivered as well. Suspense is steadily built in masterful ways that keep you ready for the shoe to drop at any moment, or possibly not at all!
I'm not sure why people seemed to dislike this so much. I almost wanted to give it a 10 just to counter the unreasonable hate, but in the end I had to grade it where it was.
- kkrouner-1
- Jan 9, 2023
- Permalink
HUGE WARNING for how boring and utterly POINTLESS and obvious it is. I'm being dead serious here! It doesn't get more boring and more pointless than this. Save your time, otherwise you'll have exactly the same reaction as me, which is - wtf? And not in a good way either. If there was a minus 10, this "movie" would certainly get it.
I'm going to keep this spoiler free but there's quite literally nothing to spoil anyway since it's all spelt out! The only thing that actually happens is a cute story and that's it! Are you kidding me? Who came up with this? Give an iPhone to a 5 year old and I guarantee you they'd make a better "movie".
I'm going to keep this spoiler free but there's quite literally nothing to spoil anyway since it's all spelt out! The only thing that actually happens is a cute story and that's it! Are you kidding me? Who came up with this? Give an iPhone to a 5 year old and I guarantee you they'd make a better "movie".
- petarilic32
- Oct 17, 2022
- Permalink
- Mulattohorrorfanatic
- Jan 29, 2023
- Permalink
To be clear, I have no skin in this game. I don't know anyone involved in this movie nor did I know anything about it when I started to watch it.
It's a small cast -- 4 people. Really 2 and a half. When you see the movie you'll see what I mean. Because the movie is confined to an old house, it's a talky movie.
In fact, it's presented almost like a play. I could easily envision this being on the stage and playing for a long time.
So there's lots of converation. Yes, you pretty much know where the plot is heading the moment the movie begins, but it's still realy fun to watch the plot unfold.
It's well done and well acted.
Not really sure why this is getting semi-bad reviews here. Maybe because it's not a traditional slasher type movie with phony scare tactics. It's more of a thinking man's film.
It's a small cast -- 4 people. Really 2 and a half. When you see the movie you'll see what I mean. Because the movie is confined to an old house, it's a talky movie.
In fact, it's presented almost like a play. I could easily envision this being on the stage and playing for a long time.
So there's lots of converation. Yes, you pretty much know where the plot is heading the moment the movie begins, but it's still realy fun to watch the plot unfold.
It's well done and well acted.
Not really sure why this is getting semi-bad reviews here. Maybe because it's not a traditional slasher type movie with phony scare tactics. It's more of a thinking man's film.
- sharkbark-32581
- Sep 13, 2022
- Permalink
The first more than an hour of this boring crap, is a conversation between Mina and Hap. First outside her mansion and then inside in the couch. Nothing happens. Nothing!! He is overly awkward and she is overly mysterious. And they do nothing by talking. Its like watching a stage show in a theater. And a very boring stage show at that. Its a total waste, watching the sad and dull crap. Its gotten bad ratings in Rotten Tomatoes and on IMDb. And if you waste time watching this crap, you will find out why. Otherwise, save time and everything else, and avoid this crap. Its boring, Its weird and nothing happens. Nothing.
- AlienLover3000
- Sep 24, 2022
- Permalink
The film gave me hope with its beginning. But was a let down by the time it ended. Justin Long really uplifts this film with his acting but the lack of chemistry amongst the other actors, and zero depth in the script made it impossible to like this film.
There were moments like some conversations between the characters which reflected a proper writing but it fell off in the rest of the film. Couple of jumpscares does the job well but that's it. For a moment it does take an interesting turn but then just leaves that part hanging which could have made this film a bit more interesting.
The ending seemed forced. It would've worked if it was a short film.
There were moments like some conversations between the characters which reflected a proper writing but it fell off in the rest of the film. Couple of jumpscares does the job well but that's it. For a moment it does take an interesting turn but then just leaves that part hanging which could have made this film a bit more interesting.
The ending seemed forced. It would've worked if it was a short film.
- Shreyansh344
- Sep 13, 2022
- Permalink
Pretty decent film told in real time, I think only made more enjoyable due to Justin Long. He played his character perfectly. This guy who thinks he's suave, looking for a good time, who is still rather awkward when it comes to women.
It's obvious from the title and trailer what's going to happen, so there's not much of a shock factor here or any surprises unfortunately, which would have made it slightly better.
Not overly keen on Kate Bosworth's casting. I actually think they should have swapped Kate's character with the second sister...she was a far better actress. Overall a decent watch but it's pretty predictable.
It's obvious from the title and trailer what's going to happen, so there's not much of a shock factor here or any surprises unfortunately, which would have made it slightly better.
Not overly keen on Kate Bosworth's casting. I actually think they should have swapped Kate's character with the second sister...she was a far better actress. Overall a decent watch but it's pretty predictable.
- bangel3322
- Sep 24, 2022
- Permalink
I guess the idea for this was to cast a male lead that is so annoying, unlikable and sleezy and to have the male lead feature in every scene for long enough for the audience to despair that the end is not happening fast enough. Enter Justin Long to play himself.
Not only does Justin Long irritate the viewer with his very poor delivery and over the top ham-fisted acting chops, but he delivers his performance in a completely unselfconscious way - as if he thinks he is really nailing it. He does not.
The female leads are a bit better but only because they look so good and so the terrible script, lack of wit, the barely credible set up and juvenile plotting, can be temporarily overlooked.
Unfortunately, Long's performance in this piece of fluff is so bad that I will be reluctant to every invest in anything with his name attached to it.
Not only does Justin Long irritate the viewer with his very poor delivery and over the top ham-fisted acting chops, but he delivers his performance in a completely unselfconscious way - as if he thinks he is really nailing it. He does not.
The female leads are a bit better but only because they look so good and so the terrible script, lack of wit, the barely credible set up and juvenile plotting, can be temporarily overlooked.
Unfortunately, Long's performance in this piece of fluff is so bad that I will be reluctant to every invest in anything with his name attached to it.
- buffo-27296
- Sep 23, 2022
- Permalink
The Pickup From Hell (literally) is really 9 parts stage play and 1 part movie. With those numbers, you're thinking it would have to be pretty darn compelling to justify your time? And it is. Thanks to Justin Long, who more or less gives a one man show for 90 minutes. Long coincidentally stars in one of the movies on my "BEST" IMDb list (see below) and clearly, even more than a decade later, he has lost none of his famous "Jimmy Stewart" charm. Oddly, this is an upside-down sort of "guys" movie in that, for self-identifying male watchers, you would be constantly asking yourself, "If that were me, at what point would I have had the common sense to grab my hat, head for the door, and run down the road SCREAMING?" ((Designated "IMDb Top Reviewer." Please check out my list "167+ Nearly-Perfect Movies (with the occasional Anime or TV miniseries) you can/should see again and again (1932 to the present))
- A_Different_Drummer
- Sep 13, 2022
- Permalink
What sounded like an interesting enough premise for a little horror/comedy was unfortunately let down by it's very poor excecution.
I am usually a fan of Justin Long and I do think he is well suited to horror/comedy but here it felt there was nothing he could have done to save the script & it's characters' awful dialogue.
The bad dialogue along with bad lighting; which was noticably bad in almost every scene. The poor acting from the three sisters was just tiring to say the least. The pacing was absolutely off, I can't call it a "slow-burn" because it never heated up, it just wandered about for 70 minutes followed by the most predictable and down-right lazy ending I could have possibly imagined.
These things wouldn't even be so much of an issue if the movie actually had any comedy to speak of, seriously don't get why it's tagged as "horror, comedy". This just wasn't it.
It wasn't deliberately bad in order to be funny, it was just bad. There was no comedic dialogue what-so-ever or any chemistry between any of the cast. Literally just felt like almost every piece of dialogue was the tired old "All men bad blah blah blah". Honestly tired of this crap being in modern movies so I will call it out.
2/10 pointless garbage.
I am usually a fan of Justin Long and I do think he is well suited to horror/comedy but here it felt there was nothing he could have done to save the script & it's characters' awful dialogue.
The bad dialogue along with bad lighting; which was noticably bad in almost every scene. The poor acting from the three sisters was just tiring to say the least. The pacing was absolutely off, I can't call it a "slow-burn" because it never heated up, it just wandered about for 70 minutes followed by the most predictable and down-right lazy ending I could have possibly imagined.
These things wouldn't even be so much of an issue if the movie actually had any comedy to speak of, seriously don't get why it's tagged as "horror, comedy". This just wasn't it.
It wasn't deliberately bad in order to be funny, it was just bad. There was no comedic dialogue what-so-ever or any chemistry between any of the cast. Literally just felt like almost every piece of dialogue was the tired old "All men bad blah blah blah". Honestly tired of this crap being in modern movies so I will call it out.
2/10 pointless garbage.
- jaweebelow
- Sep 19, 2022
- Permalink
A great movie! Just be patient and all will reveal itself. I was excited when I joked about the twist and I was right . If you have a short attention span then you won't see the best parts because you will probably switch to something else,please don't. You won't regret watching this gem. There is a lot of conversing going on in this movie but totally worth the build to climax. You will definitely be on the edge of your seat feeling something is coming in the darkness and will be brought to light. Oh, but, when? "what is with all the talking?" you ask? Read between the lines it will lead you down the rabbit hole and into a cave.
- bangbangrebelgirl
- Feb 2, 2023
- Permalink
1. A reimagining of Bram Stoker's Dracula. I usually gets bored by movies with full of conversation and less action, but this film gracefully delivered horror, tension and mystery in a smooth manner and Justin Long, Kate Bosworth and Gia Crovatin gave a tremendous performance that I enjoyed very much. It's nice to see Long back in horror genre. I loved his performance in this one and he nailed that role perfectly.
2. A reimagining of Bram Stoker's Dracula. I usually gets bored by movies with full of conversation and less action, but this film gracefully delivered horror, tension and mystery in a smooth manner and Justin Long, Kate Bosworth and Gia Crovatin gave a tremendous performance that I enjoyed very much. It's nice to see Long back in horror genre. I loved his performance in this one and he nailed that role perfectly.
2. A reimagining of Bram Stoker's Dracula. I usually gets bored by movies with full of conversation and less action, but this film gracefully delivered horror, tension and mystery in a smooth manner and Justin Long, Kate Bosworth and Gia Crovatin gave a tremendous performance that I enjoyed very much. It's nice to see Long back in horror genre. I loved his performance in this one and he nailed that role perfectly.
- ashfordofficial
- Sep 19, 2022
- Permalink
Good actors with nothing better to do. This movie sucked, I kept waiting for anything to happen. An hour and 19 mins into the movie it finally does, then it is over! Lame. Please do not watch this movie if you value your time. Not sure the point of even making a movie so unfulfilling. If you watch this one, be ready for long walking down the hall scenes. Also filled with plenty of boring conversation! Sad thing is I really like Long, albeit he was better fitted in comedy. I feel like this movie was below the bar for both of the leads in this movie. I guess if you enjoyed that movie Tusk he did then you will enjoy this one but for me it was just not my jam. I need more going on in a movie so I don't fall asleep!
This movie goes nowhere. A waste of time that you will never get back. It is really a movie about less than nothing. The good news, if you can't sleep, this movie will knock you out cold. Cast must have needed a paycheck because clearly this movie has no script, no writers. Improv at its absolute worst. Not scary, not tense, not dramatic, not interesting. An appropriate title would be KATE AND JUSTIN NEED WORK. Warning, cash grab ahead. Watching your lawn grow will provide you with a thousand times more entertainment. This awful production is truly the cure for all insomnia the world over. Too late for me, save yourselves. You're welcome.
- daleenglish-38279
- Jan 27, 2023
- Permalink