Left 4 Dead (2008 Video Game)

Vince Valenzuela: Francis

Quotes 

• Francis : Hey, watch out for that steam pipe.

  Zoey : Man, I love Steam.

  Francis : Yeah, Steam's alright, I guess. I just hate the pipes.

• Zoey : Hey Francis, your latest issue of "Hating Everything" magazine is here.

  Francis : I hate latest issues.

• Church Lunatic : [when the Survivors try to open the saferoom door]  Who's there?

  Francis : Let's see: I'm Francis, and that's Grandpa Bill, and - there's *zombies* out here! *Open the GODDAMN DOOR!*

• Francis : I hate elevators.

  Francis : I hate helicopters.

  Francis : I hate hospitals. And doctors and lawyers and cops...

  Bill : Francis, is there anything you *don't* hate?

  Francis : You know what I don't hate? I don't hate vests.

• Francis : Attention boat owner! We are... uh... the cops! Yeah the cops! I command you to come pick us up!

• Francis : Smoker! You're going to have to use that tongue of yours to pull my foot out of your ass!

• Francis : [as the Infected attack the church]  If we get out of this alive, I'm gonna *frick*-in' *kill* that guy!

• Francis : I hate the water.

• Francis : I hate vans.

• Francis : I hate sewers.

• Francis : I hate train yards.

• Francis : I hate subways.

• Francis : I hate lawyers. When are they gonna get done practicing law?

• Francis : It figures! The only thing in the damn city *not* on fire is the one thing we need to burn *down!*

• Bill : Hey, Francis, if I ever turn, can you shoot me?

  Francis : What if your beard turns? Can I shoot that?

  Bill : ...Don't be an ass, Francis.

• Francis : I'm getting tired of all these goddamn vampires!

  Bill : They're zombies, Francis!

  Francis : Call those freaks whatever you want!

• Bill , Francis , Louis , Zoey : [recurring line]  Reloading!

• Francis : I hate Ayn Rand.

• Francis : I hate small towns.

• Francis : I hate planes.

• [first lines] 

  Bill : Hold up!

  [examines a pile of corpses, touches a green fluid] 

  Bill : Never seen anything like this before...

  Francis : Geez! Don't let that stop you from smearing it all over yourself.

  Bill : [scowls; wipes fluid on Francis]  They're changing!

  Francis : [disgusted]  Ah! Dammit, Bill! Aww! It stinks!

  [Louis chuckles, right before everyone hears someone... crying...?] 

  Zoey : Someone's still alive...!