Hercules (1998–1999)
Tate Donovan: Hercules, Additional Voices
Photos
Quotes
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Parenthesis : For generations we've used the oracular reading of oxen guts to predict our student's careers, or lack thereof.
Hercules : Eeeyugh. Couldn't you use some sort of aptitude test instead?
Parenthesis : We tried that. The oxen guts were more accurate by 72%.
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Daedalus : Behold, the fundamental machine: the lever. Sublimely simple. Say it with me.
Hercules : I got it.
Daedalus : No, say lever! Never mind. Here's a working model. As my close personal friend Archimedes once said, "Give me a lever long enough, a fulcrum high enough, a place to stand, and I'll kiss you on the nose." He was a strange man.
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[Jason has found the Golden Fleece and is rubbing in on his hair]
Jason of the Argonauts : How's my hair? Black as pitch?
Hercules : Ah, no. Sorry.
Jason of the Argonauts : Oh well. I hear some fellow Grecians are working on a formula for that, anyway.
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[Hercules and Adonis are trying to impress Circe]
Adonis : First of all, look at this tan. Have you ever seen such a beautiful sight?
Hercules : Yes, as a matter of fact, on Mount Olympus. That's my home, you know. Or it will be, once I achieve my fullest potencial.
Adonis : Yes, and you will live there with all your elf and pixie friends. Right, Hercules? What fun!
[Whispering to Circe]
Adonis : He's crazy.
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[Hercules has been tied to a target by Ares and launched into the air. Ares' arrow splits the target in two, leaving Hercules with two 'wings']
Icarus : Flap, man! Flap!
Cassandra : Yeah, *that'll* work!
Hercules : Wow! Is this what it was like to fly, Icarus?
[Ares shoots the "wings" off him and Hercules flaps his arms desperately in the air for a few seconds before plummeting down]
Icarus : Yeah... that was pretty much it. Course, I got more sun.