- Daniel Hackett: Who are you?
- Pecos Bill: I'm a ring-tailed roarer. I can draw faster, shoot straighter, ride harder and drink longer than any man alive. I ride cyclones and I wrestle...
- Daniel Hackett: You got a name, don't you?
- Pecos Bill: I'm getting' to that. I'm the rip-snortinest cowboy that ever rode north, south, east or west of the Rio Grande. I'm Pecos Bill.
- Pecos Bill: Not as hot as the summer of '88 when the chickens laid fried eggs and the babies cried sawdust.
- Paul Bunyan: Does this story have a point or does it go on and on and on like this stinkin' desert?
- Pecos Bill: I ought to plug you two right now, but I make it a rule never to kill a man on Sunday.
- Zeb: Today's Wednesday.
- Daniel Hackett: Pa, Pecos Bill ain't real.
- Jonas Hackett: He's out there... where there's still enough elbow room for a man to wander. He's out there... where the land is still young and wild. You don't believe me? I swear to you by the code of the West, Pecos Bill is as real as you and me. Now, you know the Code of the West don't you?
- Daniel Hackett: Yeah, Pa, I know.
- Jonas Hackett: Respect the land, defend the defenseless and don't never spit in front of women and children.
- [on seeing a beautiful swarm of butterflies]
- Pecos Bill: Kind of makes it all worthwhile, don't you think?
- [last lines]
- Pecos Bill: He's all yours Daniel Hackett!
- Daniel Hackett: Pecos!
- Pecos Bill: So long Daniel! Take good care of Widowmaker!
- Daniel Hackett: Pecos, don't go!
- Pecos Bill: Don't worry about it! You can handle things from here. Yee ha-ha! I'm a ring tailed roarer. I can draw faster, shoot straighter, ride harder and drink longer than any man alive, l'm the rip-snortingest cowboy that ever rode North, South, East or West of the Rio Grande. I'm Pecos Bill! Yee ha-ha!
- Daniel Hackett: So long, Pecos!
- Paul Bunyan: [Creeping up on Daniel and Pecos Bill who are trapped in a cage Bunyan made] Never enough for you termites, is it? Not enough you swindled me out of my camp, robbed me of my trade, now you want my woods too. You want it all! I'm makin' my stand. At least if I go down swingin', I go down like a man!
- Pecos Bill: Ah, hush up you log-brain!
- Paul Bunyan: Pecos?
- [Pecos Bill smiles]
- Paul Bunyan: Let me take a gander at ya.
- [Pecos proudly shows off his profile]
- Paul Bunyan: You steamin' pile of buffalo puckey. You're still ugly.
- Pecos Bill: You got some business to settle, ain't ya?
- Daniel Hackett: Why would you go out of your way for me?
- Calamity Jane: Well, paint my toenails and curl my hair!
- Pecos Bill: Calamity? My cactus flower!
- Calamity Jane: Don't cactus flower me, you double-crossing dog!
- Pecos Bill: I missed you, darlin'. If only you knew how much!
- Calamity Jane: I know too well, you flea-infested little weasel!
- Pecos Bill: Calamity, you look mighty pretty tonight.
- Calamity Jane: Sweet talking me? You overgrown, mealy-mouthed, two-faced snivellin' snake! You gutless, brainless, heartless sidewinder!
- [Calamity fires her guns at Pecos standing up against a wall. He stands motionless as every shot misses him]
- Pecos Bill: You ain't still sore about Amarillo, are you?
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