K-9 (1989)

Jim Belushi: Dooley

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Quotes 

• Dooley : Alright, let's get one thing straight: The woman is mine! Now we're both members of the animal kingdom. You know that and I know that. And we both know that this thing is really primal. So if you think you're such a badass you just try that one more time and you're gonna end up in a pet cemetary! You remember the movie Old Yeller? You remember when they shot him in the end? I didn't cry! Now come on!

• [Dooley meets Jerry Lee] 

  Brannigan : There he is, the best nose on the force. He could stick that snout in the wind right now and lead you to a stash in the middle of Tijuana.

  Dooley : Listen, I gotta be up front with you. I got a real bad feeling about this dog.

  Brannigan : Hey, tough shit. That's all I got. Not I want you to take care.

  Dooley : Don't worry about the dog.

  Brannigan : It's not the dog I'm worried about.

• [Jerry Lee has just single handedly taken out an entire bar of thugs who where roughing up Dooley] 

  Dooley : I want you to know that I'm the officer in charge here, Michael Dooley not Jerry Lee.

  Jerry Lee : [looks at Dooley] 

  Dooley : Don't you ever...

  Dooley : [pause]  *ever* pull anything like that again, without talking to me first

  Jerry Lee : [puts his head down] 

  Dooley : You lost it in there you know that, you lost control, we could be killed

  [pause] 

  Dooley : I needed you back here.

  Jerry Lee : [slowly lifts his head and looks at Dooley] 

  Dooley : What if they ran out?

  [pause] 

  Dooley : You could've got them here.

  Dooley : You understand.

  Jerry Lee : [looks down] 

• Tracy : Do you know you have an animal growing out of your pants?

  Dooley : Thanks, hon. I also have a dog here.

• [Helicopter pilots are shooting up Dooley's car] 

  Dooley : Well, it's not the Eyewitness News Team.

  [Flames erupt underneath Dooley's car] 

  Dooley : I think someone's mad at me.

  [Dooley's car explodes] 

  Dooley : DEFINITELY someone is mad at me.

• Brannigan : You think you got problems? I gotta to take my wife and kids on vacation. I've got a plane to catch in 3 hours.

  Dooley : Plane? You said plane?

  Brannigan : But I ain't gonna catch the plane because I gotta wait here for the SWAT team.

  Dooley : Can I have the dog if I get you on the plane? You're airborne, you're airborne!

  Brannigan : I'll tell you what, you get me on the plane and you can marry the goddamn dog!

  Dooley : You got it!

  Brannigan : Goddamn lunatic!

• Dooley : [Dooley resolves a hostage situation by driving into it with his new car]  Narcotics? Party of 12?

• Lyman : Dooley, what is it about me that makes you so passionate?

  Dooley : Well, it's not your looks, Lyman. I guess it's your job.

  Lyman : And knowing your methods of law enforcement, I don't suppose that you have a search warrant?

  Dooley : Dog ate it. You can hang around his tail for an hour.