National Lampoon's Vacation (1983)

James Keach: Motorcycle Cop

Photos 

Quotes 

• Motorcycle Cop : Do you know what the penalty for animal cruelty is in this state?

  Clark Griswald : No, sir, I don't.

  Motorcycle Cop : Well... it's probably pretty stiff.

• [Clark has just been pulled over by a Colorado motorcycle cop] 

  Clark Griswald : Hi officer, what's the problem?

  Motorcycle Cop : Get out of the car!

  [Clark exits from the car] 

  Clark Griswald : I don't think I was speeding. Was I weaving or something?

  Motorcycle Cop : Shut your mouth, sir! You know, if I weren't in uniform, I'd split your skull with the butt of this revolver faster than you can say, "police brutality!"

  Clark Griswald : Well whatever I did, I'm sure I can explain...

  [the motorcycle cop forcibily takes Clark by the arm and leads him to the rear of the car, which has a dog leash still tied to it] 

  Motorcycle Cop : Explain this, you son-of-a-bitch!

  Clark Griswald : Oh my God...

• Clark Griswald : Oh, you can't think I'd do this on purpose? Look... I tied him to the rear bumper while I was packing the car. It was very confusing. I must have forgot. I'm very sorry, I feel terrible.

  Motorcycle Cop : How do you think that little dog feels?

  Clark Griswald : Look, I told you I was sorry. It really was an accident.

  Motorcycle Cop : Well, I guess I can buy that, sir. But it is a shame. I had a pooch like this when I was a kid.

  [both Clark and the motorcycle cop sorrowfully look at the empty road behind them] 

  Motorcycle Cop : Poor little guy. Probably kept up with you for a mile or so.

  [tearing up] 

  Motorcycle Cop : Tough little mutt...

• Aunt Edna : I was afraid you'd get pulled over, Clark. You've been exeeding the speed limit for thousands of miles!

  Rusty Griswold : Dad wasn't speeding. The cop stopped us because Dad forgot to...

  Ellen Griswold : He was speeding, Rusty!

  Rusty Griswold : No he wasn't, Mom. He...

  Clark : Rusty! Listen to your mother. I was speeding. I was driving like a maniac. We can all be grateful for this man for stopping us. You see kids...

  [the motorcycle cop appears at the car window with the dog leash] 

  Motorcycle Cop : Here's the leash, sir. I'm going back to get the rest of the carcass off the road.