- [first lines]
- Juanita: Jimmy Dean? Jimmy Dean! Come on back here to the five-and-dime now, Jimmy Dean. Jimmy Dean, you're out here, I know you are.
- Stella Mae: Christ, anybody can be happy. Look at me, I laugh my ass off all the damn time. You know, I'll laugh at just about anything.
- Edna Louise: You're not happy.
- Stella Mae: I'm happy Goddammit!
- Stella Mae: You know, I never could stand people who keep sayin' they're gonna go and then they never do.
- Joe Qualley: Mona, it was so horrible and I was so damn scared and when I tried to scream for help, they just kept punchin' me in the face! And he kept callin' me Joanne!
- Edna Louise: I had such a very nice time. Thank you all for likin' me and bein' so nice to me although I'm not very smart.
- Juanita: You do far too much messing around. I'm going to ask my Friday Bible Club to devote a prayer session to you.
- Sissy: Why dont you pray for them people in China? They need it a hell of a lot more than I do.
- Juanita: We were praying for them, but it didn't seem to do much good. Now we pray for rain.
- Joe Qualley: It's not his son!
- Mona: It is.
- Joe Qualley: Mona just because he's dead don't you go killin' me off too!