Wow. Haha, this one rulez. The version I saw was called TERROR ON THE MENU and made me think twice about that Subway sandwich I had squirreled away for a late night snack ... Eww. This is a nice, subtle little Regional Horror/Comedy effort who's nuances may elude modern day audiences (re: the morons who liked stuff like CHAOS or SAW) but movie fans with a taste for the bizarre and a morbid sense of humor will be well served. Ladled in pun.
THE PLOT: A young circa 1972 era Earth Mother type college babe finds out on the last day of classes that she has been selected the "winner" of an all expenses paid getaway vacation to the Red Wolf Inn, a picturesque Bed & Breakfast on the coast run by an older couple who are the very definition of Ma & Pa Kettle. Some other young ladies are also staying as guests, and after a very elaborate dinner party one of them vanishes. Then another. She starts to get the idea that something is wrong, especially when the grandson of the family catches a shark at the beach one day and proceeds to beat the thing to death against a rock.
That's all I am going to reveal, except to heap praise on that first dinner party, one of the most outrageous cinematic eating experiences since the Eyeball Soup and Chilled Monkey Brains gags from Indiana Jones. The best part of it is the way that the characters chew their food. They don't just masticate, they linger over every mouthful with Pa Kettle stuffing his jowly cheeks with bite after bite of fresh rib tenderloin to the point where he starts to hyperventilate. He chews and chews and chews with an almost orgasmic pleasure that is not just disturbing, it is obscene. They eat and eat and eat until everyone is stuffed and exhausted from the effort ... And then it is time for a slice of that special Key Lime cake. Oh yeah.
This is one of those movies that you are either going to get or you won't. My favorite bit of dialog is when Ma Kettle brings the young guest a plate of sandwiches. She bites down, savoring the special flavor and asks, "What is this?" "Fillet, my dear. Fillet." Lead Linda Gillen is also a bit of subtle mastery, having a kind of quiet sexiness about her that is extremely infectious + kissable, and Ma & Pa Kettle are just the spittin' image of wholesome Americana. They are all about sit down dinners, Sunday afternoon drives, garden chores and old fashioned telephones. Everything in the movie is the perfect display of harmless tradition right down to their grandson and his cousin, the local sheriff. Some folks these days might not understand but if you bring your appetite and finish your plate, I am sure you'll feel right at home. It's like David Lynch crossed with that old TV series V.
The only problem I had with the film is the last 2 seconds after the hilarious closing credits: The filmmakers decided to try and have their cake and eat it too, so to speak, though any movie this perversely good natured gets a pass for not knowing when to quit. Pass the salt.
8/10
