Review of Zwarte zwanen

Zwarte zwanen (2005)
4/10
Carice couldn't save this one alone
24 August 2024
I'd like to preface this by saying, I think every film deserves to have an audience and I wish that films could not be so easily forgotten. I don't want to deter viewers, so I'll try to clearly outline reasons for my opinions so you can judge for yourself whether you'd like to see this.

Zwarte Zwanen (Black Swans) begins with a perfect-strangers kind of romance on the beach, between a rather attractive Carice van Houten and a somewhat less attractive Dragan Bakema. To call their love one of fiery passion is adequate, but I think this oversells the invested emotion, it is more accurate to call it a voluminous montage of intertwined beach activity and sex. But as their passion for each other eventually grows, so too does a rift in their relationship, and the two must try their best to face their metaphorical demons. The film is told in three languages: Dutch primarily, and Spanish and English in various side conversations that advance the plot slightly, but just understanding the Dutch is sufficient. I hope there's a subtitled version somewhere for the majority of viewers who don't speak all three. The camera work was generally functional, with only a few jarring shots that feel like inexperienced experimentation. Sadly, the bland script relied on sex to keep the viewer's attention, for the characters, plot events, and dialogue did not feel especially engaging or well-written. A movie buff might notice some obvious but appreciated references to From Here to Eternity, A Star is Born, and Titanic. Carice van Houten is certainly the one who elevates this to watchable, and is probably one of the few actresses who could competently deliver dialogue in all three of these languages.
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