Review of Tooken

Tooken (I) (2015)
1/10
This movie didn't need to be made.
2 December 2018
We didn't need a sequel to "Taken". It was a fine movie on it's own and one that cemented Liam Neeson as a bona fide action movie star. And since it made money we got a couple sequels that weren't necessary and they weren't as good. But you know what we really didn't need? A spoof of said movie.

Where do I even begin? They literally reference the classic phone call scene at the start of the movie. But in context it doesn't even make any sense. Our hero is in the delivery room, his wife is giving birth and the doctor passes out. Just like that. I guess this is supposed to be funny? And our hero is now supposed to delver the baby. So he threatens it, by giving a truncated version of the phone call speech. Is this supposed to be comedy?

As the story goes on he's lousy when it comes to things being taken, or maybe tooken in this case, around him from his ex-wife leaving to his daughter's virginity. And then, for no reason, gangsters from Albania decide to stick explosives into puppies. Why? I guess they're supposed to be evil or something? And since his puppy has also been explosiveized, he's pushed too far and does something about it.

There was no reason for this movie to be made. Absolutely none. It's not funny. It's not well done. And it totally bombed at the box office showing that parody and spoofs really need a deft hand to make them work.
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