Review of Afula Express

Afula Express (1997)
1/10
Save your money and time...don't see this movie
24 July 2003
I just saw this movie and I want the last 90 minutes of my life back. At about the 50 minute mark I looked up and groaned that I still had 40 minutes left. I would've just stopped it, but I paid a damn good $2 to rent it so I figured why not let it end.

Pick a Card (Afula Express) is an entirely horrible movie. It follows to hateable, mismatched people who are in love (??)....Maybe. David is a pathetic, lazy loser that dreams of an obviously unreachable stardom. Batya is his overweight, whiny girlfriend who appears to have no ambition or care about anything else but David and her former home. There is no rhyme or reason for these two to care about each other except maybe they're both so unattractive they can't find anyone else to sleep with them. In fact, the most memorable thing, and by memorable I mean nightmare-ish memorable, is a scene of rough sex between the two leads in a darkened alleyway. The scene is disturbing and completely non-sensical in the context of the relationship.

The plot is both non-sensical and predictable. I won't tell you how it ends, but if you can't figure it out halfway through then you have not seen very many movies.

You'll be better off if you don't see this movie. And if you do see it, don't be angry...I did warn you.
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