Quotes

[on his attitude toward movie promotion] In a way, I'd rather ride down the street on a camel than give what is sometimes called an in-depth interview. I'd rather ride down the street on a camel nude. In a snowstorm. Backwards.

Charity is taking an ugly girl to lunch.

Lenin [Vladimir Lenin] said that people vote with their feet. Well, that's what's happening. They either go, or they don't go. It's all politics. It's all demographics.

I'm old, I'm young, I'm intelligent, I'm stupid. My tide goes in and out.

Movies are fun, but they're not a cure for cancer.

When asked why he never married any of his many girlfriends: Just because you need a quart of milk doesn't mean you have to go out and buy a whole cow.

In a way, I'd rather ride down the street on a camel than give what is sometimes called an in-depth interview. I'd rather ride down the street on a camel nude. In a snowstorm. Backwards.

My notion of a wife at forty is that a man should be able to change her, like a bank note, for two twenties.

For me, the highest level of sexual excitement is in a monogamous relationship.

You've achieved success in your field when you don't know whether what you're doing is work or play.

Polygamy is dumb fun. Monogamy requires much more sensitivity.

[on Stanley Kubrick] It was common knowledge that Stanley always knew something you didn't.

Marlon Brando was more than a uniquely gifted and influential actor. He was also an aroused citizen with broad social perspectives. Generous with his friendship and candid personal insights, he was an endlessly entertaining good neighbor. Annette [Annette Bening] and I will miss him very much.

[on doing stunts] You try to measure up the safety concerns with the adrenaline concerns, the narcissism concerns, and the ambition concerns, and hope you don't make a mistake. Usually I'd wear some kind of pad if I was going to fall.

A director needs to be in control, but he really shouldn't be in complete control, because then things could be very boring, and he wouldn't take advantage of unexpected developments and opportunities. There are people who storyboard everything. I don't do that. I'll storyboard some stuff, but mainly I'm ready for the unexpected. I think that's important. You can't plan too much. I always think of a quote from Napoleon when they asked him to explain the intricacies of his battle plan. He said, 'Well here's the plan. First we go there, and then we see what happens.'

It's best not to act and direct at the same time. When I direct myself, I do more takes than if I'm being directed by someone else. Rather than stop and look at it, I just do it again. And I like to have my fellow actors feel that they're directing it at the same time. I try to lead them into thinking it's sort of a fake democracy, when it's actually, ultimately, kind of a fascist dictatorship, one would have to admit.

[asked about his many loves] I have only one - Annette. I don't remember the others.

[on Madonna] I am still friends with her.

[on the legendary failure of Ishtar (1987)] It's a good movie.

[on biographer Peter Biskind's claim that he's slept with 12,775 women] That would not be, as Joan Didion once said to me, 'feasible.' It would not be feasible. It could not happen.

The Pianist (2002) is an absolute masterwork. Neither a personal mistake nor the misfortunes of the creator [Roman Polanski] are relative to that.