The Faithful Heart

The beginning of Faithful Hearts is so funny, but the rest of it is so awful; it's like they're two different movies pasted together. Herbert Marshall starts off as a Cockney sailor on leave during the turn of the century. He stumbles into a bar run by an aunt and her two nieces, and he makes it his mission to seduce one of the young girls, Edna Best (who was his wife in real life at the time). He throws smile after joke after line at her, but she's not interested. Finally, he leaves the bar, only to come back with one of the best pick-up lines I've ever heard. "I've come to give you something. One more chance." She finally cracks a smile...and the movie goes downhill.

A one-night stand turns into true love, and Herbie's Cockney accent disappears to make him seem more genuine. He has a three-week assignment and Edna's afraid he'll never return. Then the movie shows the date of a newspaper; it's twenty years later and he never did return. There's never any explanation, mind you. The audience is completely left hanging and wondering why he's turned into a cultured gentleman during the past twenty years. If you want to see him playing against type in the first ten minutes, it's very cute. But turn it off after Edna starts blubbering. Trust me, it's so awful, you'll be tearing your hair out at the seemingly endless running time. In truth, this movie isn't even ninety minutes; but it feels like four hours.