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In Limbo
A debut YA graphic memoir about a Korean-American girl's coming-of-age story—and a coming home story—set between a New Jersey suburb and Seoul, South Korea.
Deborah (Jung-Jin) Lee knows she's different. Ever since her family emigrated from South Korea to the United States, she's felt her Otherness. For a while, her English isn't perfect. None of her teachers can pronounce her Korean name. Her face and her eyes—especially her eyes—stand out. As the pressures of high school ramp up, friendships change and end, and everything gets harder. Even home isn't a safe place, as fights with her mom escalate. Deb is caught in a limbo, with nowhere to go, and her mental health plummets.
But Deb is resilient. She discovers art and self-care, and gradually begins to start recovering. And during a return trip to South Korea, she realizes something that changes her perspective on her family, her heritage, and herself.
This stunning debut graphic memoir features page after page of gorgeous, evocative art, perfect for Tillie Walden fans. It's a cross section of the Korean-American diaspora and mental health, a moving and powerful read in the vein of Hey, Kiddo and The Best We Could Do.
Deborah (Jung-Jin) Lee knows she's different. Ever since her family emigrated from South Korea to the United States, she's felt her Otherness. For a while, her English isn't perfect. None of her teachers can pronounce her Korean name. Her face and her eyes—especially her eyes—stand out. As the pressures of high school ramp up, friendships change and end, and everything gets harder. Even home isn't a safe place, as fights with her mom escalate. Deb is caught in a limbo, with nowhere to go, and her mental health plummets.
But Deb is resilient. She discovers art and self-care, and gradually begins to start recovering. And during a return trip to South Korea, she realizes something that changes her perspective on her family, her heritage, and herself.
This stunning debut graphic memoir features page after page of gorgeous, evocative art, perfect for Tillie Walden fans. It's a cross section of the Korean-American diaspora and mental health, a moving and powerful read in the vein of Hey, Kiddo and The Best We Could Do.
348 pages, Hardcover
First published March 7, 2023
About the author
Deb J.J. Lee
3 books127 followersDeb JJ Lee is a Korean American artist currently living in Brooklyn, NY. They have appeared in the New Yorker, Washington Post, NPR, Google, Radiolab, PBS, and more. Books they have illustrated include The Invisible Boy by Alyssa Hollingsworth (Roaring Brook Press, 2020) and The Other Side of Tomorrow by Tina Cho (HarperCollins, 2024). They enjoy reality tv, sparkling water, and pretending to be an extrovert.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 951 reviews
July 29, 2024
Pride Month
This memoir is both YA and a graphic novel, two genres I don't usually enjoy. Lo and behold, I enjoyed it immensely. I met both Deb and Victoria Ying at Chevalier's Books, when they came to speak about this book and Hungry Ghost.
I will use she/her to refer to Deb the character, because that is how the character is written. Deb the author uses they/them pronouns.
This was a difficult one to read. I imagine it's hard enough just growing up with your hormones raging and constant feelings of unease brewing. It's 10x tougher to grow up as an immigrant. Deb moves from South Korea to NJ. Her Korean name is Jung-Jin, which no one seems to be able to pronounce. She begins going by Deborah or Deb.
The feelings of loss and confusion are thick in the midst of this book. For those that need trigger warnings, mentions of suicide attempts are listed. A character named Quinn stops being friends with Deb after her suicide attempt. At first, I felt this was selfish, but on the other hand, this may be difficult to be around. In Reddit terms, ESH.
The book ended rather abruptly, which Deb mentioned at the talk. However, after hearing them discuss how this was on purpose, I understand why it was done that way. Life doesn't have a clear cut ending. Neither should this.
This memoir is both YA and a graphic novel, two genres I don't usually enjoy. Lo and behold, I enjoyed it immensely. I met both Deb and Victoria Ying at Chevalier's Books, when they came to speak about this book and Hungry Ghost.
I will use she/her to refer to Deb the character, because that is how the character is written. Deb the author uses they/them pronouns.
This was a difficult one to read. I imagine it's hard enough just growing up with your hormones raging and constant feelings of unease brewing. It's 10x tougher to grow up as an immigrant. Deb moves from South Korea to NJ. Her Korean name is Jung-Jin, which no one seems to be able to pronounce. She begins going by Deborah or Deb.
The feelings of loss and confusion are thick in the midst of this book. For those that need trigger warnings, mentions of suicide attempts are listed. A character named Quinn stops being friends with Deb after her suicide attempt. At first, I felt this was selfish, but on the other hand, this may be difficult to be around. In Reddit terms, ESH.
The book ended rather abruptly, which Deb mentioned at the talk. However, after hearing them discuss how this was on purpose, I understand why it was done that way. Life doesn't have a clear cut ending. Neither should this.
March 22, 2023
Oh wow, what a powerful graphic memoir and one of the most enjoyable illustrated works I have read in a long time. In In Limbo, Deb JJ Lee details their experience growing up in a New Jersey suburb as a Korean American child of immigrants. They write about feeling like the Other and facing racism from their white peers as well as mistreatment and abuse from their mom. As their feelings of isolation and mental suffering escalate throughout high school, they start to turn to art as a way to heal. They also take a trip to South Korea that helps them discover a new perspective on their family, their heritage, and themselves.
In Limbo swept me up; I felt so much empathy and sympathy for Deb JJ Lee’s tumultuous childhood and adolescence. Their illustrations felt vivid and alive to me and captured the raw honesty of their experiences so well. I appreciated the themes of not belonging and not meeting both the white beauty standard or really the Korean beauty standard either. As someone who was also abused by my mother, I felt my heart leap up in my throat when I read the scenes about Deb’s abuse at the hands of their mother. This graphic memoir felt so real, though in a way that also showed Lee’s processing and perspective developing over time and not like a first draft diary entry.
I most loved reading about Lee’s growth and hard-won emotional maturity. After a lot of suffering, toward the end of the graphic memoir they learn several important lessons about not expecting your friends to fix your mental health (even if you can receive support from them, just not in a codependent way) as well as honoring their Korean heritage and seeing their mother as a full-person. The therapy session they go to where their therapist made the pillars analogy made me legit choke up because I felt the exact same way about my life, about how once you can escape your childhood environment (e.g., by going to college) you can eventually go back to your childhood and witness it with newfound perspective and maybe even peace. I also felt so moved by Deb’s healthy relationship with their father. We love seeing supportive and three-dimensional Asian fathers portrayed on the page!
The main reason I give this book four stars instead of five is because I felt like some of the themes related to race and racism could have been further developed. I think the end of In Limbo highlights Lee’s initial start to developing a deeper understanding of their Korean heritage. However, I felt that Lee highlighted several instances of internalized racism (e.g., not wanting to be friends with the other Korean kid in their class at one point) but didn’t really address that internalized racism fully. There are a lot of white people in this book and while that makes sense because In Limbo is a memoir and that’s how things played out in the author’s life, I found myself wanting more growth in the area of racial self-esteem. However, I recognize that journey may have occurred after the events shown in this memoir. Overall, a heartrending debut from a talented illustrator and writer.
In Limbo swept me up; I felt so much empathy and sympathy for Deb JJ Lee’s tumultuous childhood and adolescence. Their illustrations felt vivid and alive to me and captured the raw honesty of their experiences so well. I appreciated the themes of not belonging and not meeting both the white beauty standard or really the Korean beauty standard either. As someone who was also abused by my mother, I felt my heart leap up in my throat when I read the scenes about Deb’s abuse at the hands of their mother. This graphic memoir felt so real, though in a way that also showed Lee’s processing and perspective developing over time and not like a first draft diary entry.
I most loved reading about Lee’s growth and hard-won emotional maturity. After a lot of suffering, toward the end of the graphic memoir they learn several important lessons about not expecting your friends to fix your mental health (even if you can receive support from them, just not in a codependent way) as well as honoring their Korean heritage and seeing their mother as a full-person. The therapy session they go to where their therapist made the pillars analogy made me legit choke up because I felt the exact same way about my life, about how once you can escape your childhood environment (e.g., by going to college) you can eventually go back to your childhood and witness it with newfound perspective and maybe even peace. I also felt so moved by Deb’s healthy relationship with their father. We love seeing supportive and three-dimensional Asian fathers portrayed on the page!
The main reason I give this book four stars instead of five is because I felt like some of the themes related to race and racism could have been further developed. I think the end of In Limbo highlights Lee’s initial start to developing a deeper understanding of their Korean heritage. However, I felt that Lee highlighted several instances of internalized racism (e.g., not wanting to be friends with the other Korean kid in their class at one point) but didn’t really address that internalized racism fully. There are a lot of white people in this book and while that makes sense because In Limbo is a memoir and that’s how things played out in the author’s life, I found myself wanting more growth in the area of racial self-esteem. However, I recognize that journey may have occurred after the events shown in this memoir. Overall, a heartrending debut from a talented illustrator and writer.
June 14, 2023
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“I love you when you’re at your lowest just as much as at your best. Growing up is about being sad and angry sometimes.”
What could have been a depressing and angsty coming-of-age is ultimately saved by a rewarding & bittersweet narrative arc. As a Korean-American teen girl in the very white New Jersey suburbs, Deb feels and is made to feel like an outsider. She’s introverted and insecure, struggles to make friends, has been subjected to her peers' bullying and racism, and feels very much stuck ‘in limbo’. Her dissatisfaction with her physical appearance, in particular her eyes, is exacerbated by white and western-centric beauty standards and feds into Deb’s self-hatred. Although not without friends, Deb, who is either made to feel visible or hypervisible, is deeply lonely and constantly aware, thanks to the microaggressions of her peers and of the adults in her life, of her ‘Otherness’. When she makes a new friend she soon invests all of her energies in this friendship, but her insecurity and need for validation ultimately pushes away said friend.
Contributing to Deb’s poor mental health is her strained relationship with her mother, who is shown for much of the graphic novel shouting, snapping, and even getting physically abusing her daughter. While others dismiss Deb’s mother's behavior as a result of ‘cultural’ differences, her mother’s verbal and physical 'outbursts' still affect Deb, who is made to feel worthless, a failure. There was an instance where a verbal ‘fight’ escalates into something more that came across as somewhat staged (Deb leaves the kitchen in shambles and tells her mother she doesn’t have time to clean it up now because she’s behind with her work…).
Sometimes depression can make you quite self-centered, as you are so overwhelmed and fixated on your own sadness, failures, and insecurities, as to never take into account that the people around you also may be going through some difficult times. Thankfully towards the latter half of In Limbo Deb does realize this, and even takes accountability for the way she behaved with her friend. Yet, I did find Deb's propensity for self-victimization and her possessive and obsessive behavior toward that friend rather annoying, especially when the narrative frames most of Deb's not-so-great actions as not really her fault.
I think the ending section, when Deb goes to Seoul to visit relatives, as well as Deb’s interactions with her father, had a great emotional resonance. I also appreciated that while much of the story presents Deb’s mother in a rather negative light, Deb, rather than forgiving and forgetting her mother’s physical and emotional abuse, tries to understand her (her experiences growing up, her move to the us, etc).
The art style never completely won me over, for instance, I often confused Deb's friends (one was blonde, the other a brunette, but i forgot often which one was which). Speaking of art, Deb's passion for art also comes into play but I kept hoping for it to be explored more. There were some panels that I did find beautiful, especially those in the water, or those solely focused on Deb.
While Deb's friends and the people in her art class did feel rather one-dimensional, I did like that one of them brings up how often adults and authority figures fail to see when a young person is struggling, chalking up their depression or unenthusiasm to laziness or in the case of Deb's friend drugs. I think Deb's story also examines how it feels when you feel that your parents aren't there for you, or worse still, they just confirm everything that you hate about yourself or fail to recognise your pain.
For some reason when I read this I forgot that it was a memoir, and I wonder if maybe I would appreciated it more if I'd kept that in mind.
Maybe I would have found this more hard-hitting if I hadn’t watched Kim Bora's House of Hummingbird on the same day I finished reading this, which is also a coming-of-age that deals with domestic abuse, dysfunctional parents, loneliness, growing-up, feeling left behind by your friends.
While I may have not been the ideal reader for this graphic novel that should not dissuade you from picking it up.
I admire Lee for writing about their experiences and for being able to be both critical and compassionate towards their younger self. It isn't easy to unlearn self-loathing practices, especially if you have been made to feel unworthy by your own parent.
ps: i have used her/she to refer to deb the character not Lee the author (who uses they/them).
“I love you when you’re at your lowest just as much as at your best. Growing up is about being sad and angry sometimes.”
What could have been a depressing and angsty coming-of-age is ultimately saved by a rewarding & bittersweet narrative arc. As a Korean-American teen girl in the very white New Jersey suburbs, Deb feels and is made to feel like an outsider. She’s introverted and insecure, struggles to make friends, has been subjected to her peers' bullying and racism, and feels very much stuck ‘in limbo’. Her dissatisfaction with her physical appearance, in particular her eyes, is exacerbated by white and western-centric beauty standards and feds into Deb’s self-hatred. Although not without friends, Deb, who is either made to feel visible or hypervisible, is deeply lonely and constantly aware, thanks to the microaggressions of her peers and of the adults in her life, of her ‘Otherness’. When she makes a new friend she soon invests all of her energies in this friendship, but her insecurity and need for validation ultimately pushes away said friend.
Contributing to Deb’s poor mental health is her strained relationship with her mother, who is shown for much of the graphic novel shouting, snapping, and even getting physically abusing her daughter. While others dismiss Deb’s mother's behavior as a result of ‘cultural’ differences, her mother’s verbal and physical 'outbursts' still affect Deb, who is made to feel worthless, a failure. There was an instance where a verbal ‘fight’ escalates into something more that came across as somewhat staged (Deb leaves the kitchen in shambles and tells her mother she doesn’t have time to clean it up now because she’s behind with her work…).
Sometimes depression can make you quite self-centered, as you are so overwhelmed and fixated on your own sadness, failures, and insecurities, as to never take into account that the people around you also may be going through some difficult times. Thankfully towards the latter half of In Limbo Deb does realize this, and even takes accountability for the way she behaved with her friend. Yet, I did find Deb's propensity for self-victimization and her possessive and obsessive behavior toward that friend rather annoying, especially when the narrative frames most of Deb's not-so-great actions as not really her fault.
I think the ending section, when Deb goes to Seoul to visit relatives, as well as Deb’s interactions with her father, had a great emotional resonance. I also appreciated that while much of the story presents Deb’s mother in a rather negative light, Deb, rather than forgiving and forgetting her mother’s physical and emotional abuse, tries to understand her (her experiences growing up, her move to the us, etc).
The art style never completely won me over, for instance, I often confused Deb's friends (one was blonde, the other a brunette, but i forgot often which one was which). Speaking of art, Deb's passion for art also comes into play but I kept hoping for it to be explored more. There were some panels that I did find beautiful, especially those in the water, or those solely focused on Deb.
While Deb's friends and the people in her art class did feel rather one-dimensional, I did like that one of them brings up how often adults and authority figures fail to see when a young person is struggling, chalking up their depression or unenthusiasm to laziness or in the case of Deb's friend drugs. I think Deb's story also examines how it feels when you feel that your parents aren't there for you, or worse still, they just confirm everything that you hate about yourself or fail to recognise your pain.
For some reason when I read this I forgot that it was a memoir, and I wonder if maybe I would appreciated it more if I'd kept that in mind.
Maybe I would have found this more hard-hitting if I hadn’t watched Kim Bora's House of Hummingbird on the same day I finished reading this, which is also a coming-of-age that deals with domestic abuse, dysfunctional parents, loneliness, growing-up, feeling left behind by your friends.
While I may have not been the ideal reader for this graphic novel that should not dissuade you from picking it up.
I admire Lee for writing about their experiences and for being able to be both critical and compassionate towards their younger self. It isn't easy to unlearn self-loathing practices, especially if you have been made to feel unworthy by your own parent.
ps: i have used her/she to refer to deb the character not Lee the author (who uses they/them).
Read
June 6, 2023I'm not going to give this book a star rating, because it deals with some extremely heavy topics I have no experience with (multiple suicide attempts, physical abuse of a child by a parent). This memoir covers four years of the main character's life, all of high school. Korean American Jung Jin, who goes by Deborah or Deb at school, made most of her friends in orchestra in junior high. But in high school she falls out of love with violin and quits music to focus more time and energy into drawing. She floats through school, feeling disconnected from peers and family, especially her mother, who swings from supportive to volatile. Another main theme is friendship- a solid, long-term friendship which Deb neglects, and a shorter, intense friendship that consumes Deb's emotional world until it falls apart. This is a story of quiet survival, of incremental steps towards healing, balance, and self actualization. Like life, it is somewhat loose in structure, but the illustrations are stunning.
October 17, 2023
A powerful graphic novel with some really distressing moments. I am unsure who I would recommend this to as whilst it was good, it was also very dark and painful. Please read the hidden content warning if you work in a library where young people may wish to borrow this. The mother is verbally, emotionally and physically abusive and dealing with her own inner demons. This amazingly powerful book definitely needs to be vetted before being purchased for a school library.
December 6, 2022
TW: Suicide attempt, suicide ideation, familial abuse.
Thank you to NetGalley, Deb JJ Lee, and Macmillian for an ARC of this graphic memoir. I enjoy the niche of Asian American graphic memoirs such as Trung Le Nguyen's The Magic Fish, Laura Gao's Messy Roots, and Thi Bui's The Best We Could Do. The medium of comics and illustrations provides the opportunity for the storyteller to distort reality and to create images that are difficult to replicate through live-action film and tv. The medium provides a visual texture, and in that regard, Lee's technical work exceeds that. Lee's backgrounds are to marvel at and they create some cinematic moments. There are some creative transitions as well. I also appreciated that their Dad was supportive of them, though at times he was complicit/complacent about their Mom's abuse. I'm curious if Lee felt that way though.
Now getting onto the cons.
The blurb section comparing Lee's memoir to Bui's work feels unfair to compare in terms of tone, form, and content. Bui's work deals with a heavier subject of Vietnamese refugees who have experienced the historical violence of French colonization and the Vietnam War. That's not to minimize Lee's experience; however; their lived experiences are too dissimilar from Bui's parents to be compared to. Using Bui's work as a shorthand is a disservice to both of their works and weakens Lee's work. Lee's work reminds me of someone like Anna Akana due to Akana's focus on mental health.
Reviewing a memoir can be difficult without devolving into the creator's personal life, but Lee shares a common experience of a middle-class Asian American. Lee's work would appeal to someone in Subtle Asian Traits. Their childhood was a collage of assimilation such as not liking Korean language school, having an abusive mother that wanted them to get the best grades, losing their Korean language skills, double eye-lid surgery, and having an English/Western name. One moment especially is cliche where they find themselves forever stuck in between their American and Korean heritage, where they're too American for their Korean side and too Korean for their American side. This trope specifically is trite and doesn't tread any new ground.
Even though the relationships between Lee, Quinn, Kate, and their Mom were central to the graphic memoir, their interiority felt hollow or not developed. The beats between Lee and Quinn feel surface-level. I was interested in learning more about Lee's Mom, yet her backstory isn't all that really developed. I also kept wondering about their family's departure from Korea and the specificities of their moving between places or living in New Jersey. I wondered about the Korean community in New Jersey or how Korean people thought about mental health.
I wish I could say that Lee's closure or resolve with their Mom was thoroughly felt, but it didn't. Part of Lee's memoir could have more details and develop the relationships and characters more such as Quinn, Kate, and their Mom.
I would have preferred a black-and-white color palette or creative use of colors throughout the work. I look forward to seeing Lee's work in the future and seeing what she creates. On a technical level, their illustrations are good though their narrative and writing have room to grow.
Thank you to NetGalley, Deb JJ Lee, and Macmillian for an ARC of this graphic memoir. I enjoy the niche of Asian American graphic memoirs such as Trung Le Nguyen's The Magic Fish, Laura Gao's Messy Roots, and Thi Bui's The Best We Could Do. The medium of comics and illustrations provides the opportunity for the storyteller to distort reality and to create images that are difficult to replicate through live-action film and tv. The medium provides a visual texture, and in that regard, Lee's technical work exceeds that. Lee's backgrounds are to marvel at and they create some cinematic moments. There are some creative transitions as well. I also appreciated that their Dad was supportive of them, though at times he was complicit/complacent about their Mom's abuse. I'm curious if Lee felt that way though.
Now getting onto the cons.
The blurb section comparing Lee's memoir to Bui's work feels unfair to compare in terms of tone, form, and content. Bui's work deals with a heavier subject of Vietnamese refugees who have experienced the historical violence of French colonization and the Vietnam War. That's not to minimize Lee's experience; however; their lived experiences are too dissimilar from Bui's parents to be compared to. Using Bui's work as a shorthand is a disservice to both of their works and weakens Lee's work. Lee's work reminds me of someone like Anna Akana due to Akana's focus on mental health.
Reviewing a memoir can be difficult without devolving into the creator's personal life, but Lee shares a common experience of a middle-class Asian American. Lee's work would appeal to someone in Subtle Asian Traits. Their childhood was a collage of assimilation such as not liking Korean language school, having an abusive mother that wanted them to get the best grades, losing their Korean language skills, double eye-lid surgery, and having an English/Western name. One moment especially is cliche where they find themselves forever stuck in between their American and Korean heritage, where they're too American for their Korean side and too Korean for their American side. This trope specifically is trite and doesn't tread any new ground.
Even though the relationships between Lee, Quinn, Kate, and their Mom were central to the graphic memoir, their interiority felt hollow or not developed. The beats between Lee and Quinn feel surface-level. I was interested in learning more about Lee's Mom, yet her backstory isn't all that really developed. I also kept wondering about their family's departure from Korea and the specificities of their moving between places or living in New Jersey. I wondered about the Korean community in New Jersey or how Korean people thought about mental health.
I wish I could say that Lee's closure or resolve with their Mom was thoroughly felt, but it didn't. Part of Lee's memoir could have more details and develop the relationships and characters more such as Quinn, Kate, and their Mom.
I would have preferred a black-and-white color palette or creative use of colors throughout the work. I look forward to seeing Lee's work in the future and seeing what she creates. On a technical level, their illustrations are good though their narrative and writing have room to grow.
July 16, 2023
This is memoir about liminal spaces: the space between childhood and adulthood; the space between friends and strangers; the space between cultures; between parent and child. Lee’s artwork, and the grayscale coloring, emphasizes this in-betweenness.
In Limbo follows Lee through their high school years—losing friends, gaining friends, trying to figure themself out, and trying to navigate the painful relationship with their mother.
The last few pages were touching and almost made me cry. Lee is navigating a lot of pain, anger, and resentment, but this memoir also serves as a way toward forgiveness, out of this liminal space: forgiveness of others & self.
In Limbo follows Lee through their high school years—losing friends, gaining friends, trying to figure themself out, and trying to navigate the painful relationship with their mother.
The last few pages were touching and almost made me cry. Lee is navigating a lot of pain, anger, and resentment, but this memoir also serves as a way toward forgiveness, out of this liminal space: forgiveness of others & self.
Read
January 25, 2023Firstly, I want to start off this review by expressing deep gratitude to be able to read this memoir, and receive this ARC.
Since some time, I stopped reading E-Books because it just felt too draining for me, to read something on digital media.
But today I decided to catch up, and I was very grateful and surprised, when I got the notification that my request for the ARC had been approved. I started this book like some hours to go, and now finished it.
I think this graphic novel has got me out of some kind of a reading slump, lol.
To get right into the book;
It is always difficult to review a memoir, since you have to continuosly take into consideration, that it is in no way fiction.
I really loved the artstyle and the soft, blue hue colour palette of the canvas!!
The thing I could relate most to, was probably the relatable narration, which gave me, as a reader, insight into feelings and the opportunity to directly relate to the situation and the difficulties, that especially Deborah was going through.
I especially related to her feeling of loss, as in being torn between two cultures, and not being able to choose between one.
The simple, yet outstanding narration made it so easy to feel empathy towards the characters and the actions.
(Disclaimer: This graphic novel; memoir deals with heavy topics.)
I can‘t to anything more than sending out lots of greetings, hope and sincere wishes to the author, for being able to portray her own difficulties and not losing hope because of them!
Since some time, I stopped reading E-Books because it just felt too draining for me, to read something on digital media.
But today I decided to catch up, and I was very grateful and surprised, when I got the notification that my request for the ARC had been approved. I started this book like some hours to go, and now finished it.
I think this graphic novel has got me out of some kind of a reading slump, lol.
To get right into the book;
It is always difficult to review a memoir, since you have to continuosly take into consideration, that it is in no way fiction.
I really loved the artstyle and the soft, blue hue colour palette of the canvas!!
The thing I could relate most to, was probably the relatable narration, which gave me, as a reader, insight into feelings and the opportunity to directly relate to the situation and the difficulties, that especially Deborah was going through.
I especially related to her feeling of loss, as in being torn between two cultures, and not being able to choose between one.
The simple, yet outstanding narration made it so easy to feel empathy towards the characters and the actions.
(Disclaimer: This graphic novel; memoir deals with heavy topics.)
I can‘t to anything more than sending out lots of greetings, hope and sincere wishes to the author, for being able to portray her own difficulties and not losing hope because of them!
November 25, 2023
Whewwwww....this one was tough! But I'm glad that I read it.
In Limbo is a graphic novel memoir of Deb's coming of age experiences that detail her complicated and toxic relationship with her mother as well as her struggles with mental health. Struggling to fulfill her mother's unrealistic expectations, Deb spends a lot of time not only attempting to process who she is to her mother, but also her identity as both Korean and American.
What Worked: THE ARTWORK! If there was ever a moment that I've been proud to see a creator follow their dreams, this is it! I understand that Deb was good at violin, but I must commend her on the strength and courage she had to follow her passions even in the face of dealing with an abusive parent. I also appreciated how Deb illustrated the complicated feelings associated with "otherness" and how she consistently felt stuck in between being Korean and American. There were also these complicated feelings of being in "limbo" that were closely associated with Deb's mother. Their relationship is not far removed from the relationship I had with my mother, so there were explicit moments where I deeply connected to Deb's feelings of hurt and inadequacy. I also appreciated the complicated nature of Deb's friendships as they were often impacted by her mental health. There was a moment of clarity for Deb where she had to accept the possible loss of her friendship worked so well for me.
Overall, this was an impactful, beautiful graphic memoir. I'll definitely be adding it to my rotation of graphic memoirs to recommend.
In Limbo is a graphic novel memoir of Deb's coming of age experiences that detail her complicated and toxic relationship with her mother as well as her struggles with mental health. Struggling to fulfill her mother's unrealistic expectations, Deb spends a lot of time not only attempting to process who she is to her mother, but also her identity as both Korean and American.
What Worked: THE ARTWORK! If there was ever a moment that I've been proud to see a creator follow their dreams, this is it! I understand that Deb was good at violin, but I must commend her on the strength and courage she had to follow her passions even in the face of dealing with an abusive parent. I also appreciated how Deb illustrated the complicated feelings associated with "otherness" and how she consistently felt stuck in between being Korean and American. There were also these complicated feelings of being in "limbo" that were closely associated with Deb's mother. Their relationship is not far removed from the relationship I had with my mother, so there were explicit moments where I deeply connected to Deb's feelings of hurt and inadequacy. I also appreciated the complicated nature of Deb's friendships as they were often impacted by her mental health. There was a moment of clarity for Deb where she had to accept the possible loss of her friendship worked so well for me.
Overall, this was an impactful, beautiful graphic memoir. I'll definitely be adding it to my rotation of graphic memoirs to recommend.
May 25, 2024
Thank you, First Second Books, for the advance reading copy.
I love the artwork and really appreciate the representation. It’s one of the few graphic novel memoirs that reflects what it means to the person writing and illustrating the story that no other person could capture exactly.
A young adult debut graphic memoir and I am quite impressed. It talks about coming of age, how it feels like to be “always forever in between“ when you aren’t a Korean or you aren’t an American. It’s the story of struggling trying to be who we are and how we accept ourselves truly despite the many challenges we have.
It’s about identity. It’s about choosing our life.
Love it. I struggled a bit while reading the graphic memoir as I find some parts to be quite repetitive and I couldn’t understand some of the other character’s perspectives.
Overall, a good read.
I love the artwork and really appreciate the representation. It’s one of the few graphic novel memoirs that reflects what it means to the person writing and illustrating the story that no other person could capture exactly.
A young adult debut graphic memoir and I am quite impressed. It talks about coming of age, how it feels like to be “always forever in between“ when you aren’t a Korean or you aren’t an American. It’s the story of struggling trying to be who we are and how we accept ourselves truly despite the many challenges we have.
It’s about identity. It’s about choosing our life.
Love it. I struggled a bit while reading the graphic memoir as I find some parts to be quite repetitive and I couldn’t understand some of the other character’s perspectives.
Overall, a good read.
June 7, 2023
beautifully illustrated and written!
October 25, 2023
In Limbo, is a quick YA read that follows the teenage years of a Korean girl in high school who is struggling to find her own identity while dealing with mental health issues.
Growing up I read comic books/manga and am a huge fan of Asian Lit, In Limbo, is the first graphic memoir I’ve read. It’s a book my 16 year old niece mentioned to me so I was excited to read it knowing it was based on true life experiences.
The artwork conveys the emotional struggle Deborah went through growing up Korean in America. Coping with family trauma, true friendships, being stereotyped, and learning to accept herself.
In Limbo will be published 3/7/23-Thank you NetGalley and First Second books for providing me with an ARC
Growing up I read comic books/manga and am a huge fan of Asian Lit, In Limbo, is the first graphic memoir I’ve read. It’s a book my 16 year old niece mentioned to me so I was excited to read it knowing it was based on true life experiences.
The artwork conveys the emotional struggle Deborah went through growing up Korean in America. Coping with family trauma, true friendships, being stereotyped, and learning to accept herself.
In Limbo will be published 3/7/23-Thank you NetGalley and First Second books for providing me with an ARC
March 3, 2023
Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for providing me with a free eARC in exchange for an honest review!
This had such beautiful imagery, all designed in a monochromatic blue-and-white colour palette, but it was a much heavier read than I had expected. There are themes of insecurity, both about the main character's appearance and her personality, and loneliness that were quite painful to read about. Poor mental health, particularly depression, plays a huge part in this graphic novel - and there is an on-page suicide attempt to be aware of. I think my problem is that there is never any real sense of closure or resolve with the issues that are brought up; the main character does go to therapy, but it is abruptly stopped after her mother stops paying for it; and the abuse that the main character experiences at the hands of her mother is never addressed as such, and instead it is more suggested that there isn't necessarily anything that wrong with what happened to her? I thought that if that had at least been addressed as being abuse, it could have left a more poignant message. But of course, with any memoir, it is difficult as the author has likely not fully come to terms with everything herself.
This had such beautiful imagery, all designed in a monochromatic blue-and-white colour palette, but it was a much heavier read than I had expected. There are themes of insecurity, both about the main character's appearance and her personality, and loneliness that were quite painful to read about. Poor mental health, particularly depression, plays a huge part in this graphic novel - and there is an on-page suicide attempt to be aware of. I think my problem is that there is never any real sense of closure or resolve with the issues that are brought up; the main character does go to therapy, but it is abruptly stopped after her mother stops paying for it; and the abuse that the main character experiences at the hands of her mother is never addressed as such, and instead it is more suggested that there isn't necessarily anything that wrong with what happened to her? I thought that if that had at least been addressed as being abuse, it could have left a more poignant message. But of course, with any memoir, it is difficult as the author has likely not fully come to terms with everything herself.
March 21, 2023
This was a DEEPLY personal debut graphic novel that goes into great depth on the struggles the author had growing up as a Korean born American and never quite fitting into either identity. There's also amazing mental health rep, suicide attempts, therapy and toxic/abusive parental relationships. The drawings too are some of the best I've seen in a graphic novel and I can't recommend this book enough! Perfect for fans of Almost American girl by Robin Ha. Many thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for an early digital copy in exchange for my honest review.
November 13, 2024
güzel bir hikayeydi, farklı göründüğü için zorbalığa uğrayan, aşırı düşünen ve hatta düşünmeyi durduramayan bir ana karakterimiz vardı. hem arkadaşlarıyla hem de ailesiyle yaşadığı sorunları çok iyi anlayabildim. çizimleri de beğendim. puan kırdım çünkü olaylar arasında zaman zaman çok ani geçişler oldu ve "yanlışlıkla sayfa mı atladım?" diye düşünmeme neden oldu. bunun dışında güzeldi.
November 7, 2024
Bir, iki, üç, dört ve beş.. Sayıyor ve şimdi Deborah’ı dinliyoruz: ne hissettiğinden çok ne hissetmesi gerektiğini düşünen, aynalardan uzak, yalnızlığıyla kalabalık bir genç kız Deborah.
Jung Jin olarak Seul’den Amerika’ya göçleriyle ve artık Deborah ismini kullanmaya başlamasıyla içinde günden güne açılan boşluğu anlamlandırmak zaman alıyor. Ve parça parça eksiliyor.
.
Arafta bir çizgi roman. Sade olduğu kadar çarpıcı. Deb JJ Lee kendini anlatıyor, Deborah’ı da Jung Jin’i de anlamamızı sağlıyor. Hikaye göçmenlik, güzellik standartları, kendini sevme, özşefkat, ebeveynlik gibi konulara temas ederken acıma beklemiyor okurdan. Kimseyi kötülemiyor, kimseyi göklere de çıkarmıyor.
Deborah pek çoğumuzun geçtiği çakıllı yollardan geçiyor. Çünkü farklı coğrafyalarda farklı biçimlerde de olsa büyüme sancıları çekiyoruz hepimiz, kimimiz yolunu buluyor, kimimiz kayboluyor.
.
Arafta’yı hem çizimleri hem hikayesiyle çok sevdim~
.
Tolga Yozcu çevirisiyle ~
Jung Jin olarak Seul’den Amerika’ya göçleriyle ve artık Deborah ismini kullanmaya başlamasıyla içinde günden güne açılan boşluğu anlamlandırmak zaman alıyor. Ve parça parça eksiliyor.
.
Arafta bir çizgi roman. Sade olduğu kadar çarpıcı. Deb JJ Lee kendini anlatıyor, Deborah’ı da Jung Jin’i de anlamamızı sağlıyor. Hikaye göçmenlik, güzellik standartları, kendini sevme, özşefkat, ebeveynlik gibi konulara temas ederken acıma beklemiyor okurdan. Kimseyi kötülemiyor, kimseyi göklere de çıkarmıyor.
Deborah pek çoğumuzun geçtiği çakıllı yollardan geçiyor. Çünkü farklı coğrafyalarda farklı biçimlerde de olsa büyüme sancıları çekiyoruz hepimiz, kimimiz yolunu buluyor, kimimiz kayboluyor.
.
Arafta’yı hem çizimleri hem hikayesiyle çok sevdim~
.
Tolga Yozcu çevirisiyle ~
Read
May 20, 2024Un fascinante cómic autobiográfico en el que lo literario y lo plástico están a la par. La autora es capaz de narrar una adolescencia rabiosa y hacernos entender los motivos de esa rabia. Un genial retrato de las amistades tóxicas, las familias tóxicas y las relaciones tóxicas con uno mismo que nos muestra cómo al final, como tantas veces, el arte es lo único que nos salva.
December 3, 2022
In Limbo is an incredibly moving, and at times very heavy memoir that I couldn't put down. This book follows Lee's teen years, showcasing the combination of not only her specific experiences as a young Korean immigrant—dealing with a mother who asks too much, a cultural identity she feels both distanced from and burdened by, and the relentless racism and bullying she faces—but also the widely-felt pain of being an alienated teen with mental illness and without many friends to lean on.
I related way too well to some of Deborah's struggles, especially with her mental illness and her very small group of friends to whom she attached herself too strongly (leaving her destitute when any one of them pulled away or slighted her in real or imagined ways). There was one moment where she was spiraling into a panic over the idea that her best friend had "replaced" her with other friends, and all I could do was sigh quietly to myself, because gods, hadn't I been there before in my teen years?
Not only that, but watching her struggle with her relationship with her mother was brutal at times. Like I said, this is a heavy read and not much is left to the imagination when it comes to Lee's mother's verbal or physical abuse. Overall, I have to be honest and say that In Limbo is mostly a fairly bleak memoir without a lot of bright spots or hope peeking through, but it is a memoir, and I respect and admire the fact that the author was so honest and didn't sugarcoat things in the end.
Thank you to the publisher for the review copy! All thoughts are honest and my own.
✨ Representation: Deborah Jung-Jin Lee, her family members, and a couple of side characters are Korean
✨ Content warnings for:
———
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I related way too well to some of Deborah's struggles, especially with her mental illness and her very small group of friends to whom she attached herself too strongly (leaving her destitute when any one of them pulled away or slighted her in real or imagined ways). There was one moment where she was spiraling into a panic over the idea that her best friend had "replaced" her with other friends, and all I could do was sigh quietly to myself, because gods, hadn't I been there before in my teen years?
Not only that, but watching her struggle with her relationship with her mother was brutal at times. Like I said, this is a heavy read and not much is left to the imagination when it comes to Lee's mother's verbal or physical abuse. Overall, I have to be honest and say that In Limbo is mostly a fairly bleak memoir without a lot of bright spots or hope peeking through, but it is a memoir, and I respect and admire the fact that the author was so honest and didn't sugarcoat things in the end.
Thank you to the publisher for the review copy! All thoughts are honest and my own.
✨ Representation: Deborah Jung-Jin Lee, her family members, and a couple of side characters are Korean
✨ Content warnings for:
———
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February 23, 2024
Felt unfinished, and as a memoir not fully processed.
February 6, 2023
Love love loved this book! So raw and so brave, one of my favourite graphic novel memoirs for sure! I really loved the way diaspora was explored and portrayed through the author's personal lens as well as their mental health struggles and other issues like high school life, and other growing pains.
I got sucked into this one because of it's beautiful cover and artwork throughout the book and stayed for the raw honesty with which the author delved into a part of her life, as well as the opportunity for compassion and empathy for our younger selves/ our lowest points in life.
I really really loved this one.
I got sucked into this one because of it's beautiful cover and artwork throughout the book and stayed for the raw honesty with which the author delved into a part of her life, as well as the opportunity for compassion and empathy for our younger selves/ our lowest points in life.
I really really loved this one.
January 9, 2023
I'm not a huge memoir reader, but I have a soft spot for graphic memoirs. And this is a really good one. The art style and the text worked really well together, making this a really poignant, emotional story. The artwork is really beautiful and invokes a lot of feeling, making this into a story I'm going to need to sit with for a little while.
December 8, 2024
Çok sevemedim açıkçası. Özellikle sonu çok aceleye getirilmiş gibi hissettim. Bazı travmatik ebeveyn davranışları "N'apcaksın o da öyle." düşüncesinin altında normalleştiriliyor gibi geldi. Evet çoğumuzun ebeveyni çocukken başarılı olmamızı istedikleri için bizi başka çocuklarla karşılaştırdı. Benzer yollardan geçip, terapide benzer konulardan bahsettik biz de, boşuna değil :) Kişinin kendini olduğu gibi kabullenmesine dair de destekleyen bir şey söylemiyor diye düşünüyorum. Yani evet Koreli genç kızlar eminim göz kapaklarına takıklardır ve ameliyat olmak istiyorlardır ama body normativity adına keşke ameliyat fikri işin içine girmese miydi diye de düşünmeden edemiyorum. Neyse seven insanlarla konuşursam belki düşüncelerim değişir.
July 14, 2023
I've been racking my brains over what to write in my review, but frankly it's just not my place to comment. But since I have to leave feedback for my arc...
The author is honest and unflinching in opening up about her struggles, which I appreciate. But while this graphic memoir sheds light on several heavy and complex issues, I just didn't feel or glean anything much from it. I could not relate to its contents, wasn't fond of the protagonist and felt a disconnect while reading. Maybe I need to read it again when I'm in the right mood and setting.
Giving a memoir a less-than-stellar rating always feels tricky, but I'm giving this 3 stars as an indication of how I feel about the book overall: Good but I didn't love it.
Thank you to First Second Books for the ARC.
The author is honest and unflinching in opening up about her struggles, which I appreciate. But while this graphic memoir sheds light on several heavy and complex issues, I just didn't feel or glean anything much from it. I could not relate to its contents, wasn't fond of the protagonist and felt a disconnect while reading. Maybe I need to read it again when I'm in the right mood and setting.
Giving a memoir a less-than-stellar rating always feels tricky, but I'm giving this 3 stars as an indication of how I feel about the book overall: Good but I didn't love it.
Thank you to First Second Books for the ARC.
Read
July 17, 2024هذه السيرة الذاتية المصورة مليئة بالمواضيع الشائكة الموجعة؛ ألّا تنتمي في بلدك الأصلي ولا في مكان عيشك، فالمهاجر يعيش دائمًا بين الإثنين، لا يستطيع الركون إلى جهة دون الأخرى. كذلك، أن تعيش في منزل سام موحش، والدة تعنف أولادها لفظيًا وجسديًا، ووالدٌ يسكت عن ذلك، فهو وإن كان لا يعنفهم مباشرةً، فإن سكوته يفعل. الحب المشروط بين الآباء وأبنائهم، أهمية التفوق الأكاديمي، بل وفي جميع مجالات الحياة، — "أن تكوني مثاليةً بلا أيِّ عيب" هذا ما طالبت الأم به بصريح العبارة —، علاقات الصداقة المعقدة، وأهمية الطب النفسي. وأخيرًا، وأهم مايكون: لا يوجد شيء كـ"اختلاف ثقافات" حين نأتي للتعنيف.
لا أستطيع تقبل فكرة "المسامحة"، إلّا أنني تأثرت أثناء قراءتي لحديث بطلة القصة مع والدها، حين كان يخبرها بكل تفهم وحب بأنه يتمنى لو تسامح أمها، فأجابت بكل صدق أنها تتمنى ذلك أيضًا. أعتقد أنني كذلك لطالما رغبت ذلك، لأجلي أكثر مما هو من أجل أيّ شخص أخر.
تحذير: محاولة انتحار، إيذاء للنفس، علاقات سامة، تعنيف لفظي وجسدي.
March 1, 2024
ooof. good but a lot emotionally.
March 8, 2023
IN LIMBO is a beautiful coming-of-age graphic memoir from artist Deb JJ Lee that chronicles their life as a young Korean immigrant. It is sometimes uncomfortably honest and most of the time just bleak.
The author is in limbo between a lot— feeling not Korean or American enough, giving up music in exchange for art, being a dutiful daughter or being your own person. The teenage angst is there, but there are also real issues and trauma laid out in these pages. The book gets heavy. But it also focuses on healing.
I think this memoir was honest in a way where the author can be seen as self-centered and always claiming the victim. But aren’t (most) teens that way? I know I was. It’s no secret that our brains don’t stop developing and maturing into mid to late 20s, which means areas of the brain associated with empathy, higher-level thinking, and self-awareness are widely underused by teens. It’s biology.
I bring this up because I’ve read some reviews of this book that criticized how much the author is fixated on their own sadness. While I can understand that criticism, I think that entirely misses the point of this memoir, which is baked right into the title—IN LIMBO.
I really enjoyed the book, but it wasn’t until the very end that I understood how special this book would be for me. The last few pages show an interaction between the author and their mom that made me break down and weep. I was immediately filled with so much complex emotion, I didn’t really understand why I was crying. Even now, as I am typing this, I am crying. And as a first time mom, this moment for me encapsulates the depth and complexity of motherhood. And while this book is written from the daughter’s perspective, whom I solidly identified with throughout the entire book, the last few pages allowed me to understood both characters so profoundly within a small and insignificant moment. Honestly, I can write an entire review on unpacking the last few pages. But, I won’t. I’ll save it for my DMs so if anyone else felt the same way, please DM me.
Thank you to the publisher for the gifted copy!
The author is in limbo between a lot— feeling not Korean or American enough, giving up music in exchange for art, being a dutiful daughter or being your own person. The teenage angst is there, but there are also real issues and trauma laid out in these pages. The book gets heavy. But it also focuses on healing.
I think this memoir was honest in a way where the author can be seen as self-centered and always claiming the victim. But aren’t (most) teens that way? I know I was. It’s no secret that our brains don’t stop developing and maturing into mid to late 20s, which means areas of the brain associated with empathy, higher-level thinking, and self-awareness are widely underused by teens. It’s biology.
I bring this up because I’ve read some reviews of this book that criticized how much the author is fixated on their own sadness. While I can understand that criticism, I think that entirely misses the point of this memoir, which is baked right into the title—IN LIMBO.
I really enjoyed the book, but it wasn’t until the very end that I understood how special this book would be for me. The last few pages show an interaction between the author and their mom that made me break down and weep. I was immediately filled with so much complex emotion, I didn’t really understand why I was crying. Even now, as I am typing this, I am crying. And as a first time mom, this moment for me encapsulates the depth and complexity of motherhood. And while this book is written from the daughter’s perspective, whom I solidly identified with throughout the entire book, the last few pages allowed me to understood both characters so profoundly within a small and insignificant moment. Honestly, I can write an entire review on unpacking the last few pages. But, I won’t. I’ll save it for my DMs so if anyone else felt the same way, please DM me.
Thank you to the publisher for the gifted copy!
June 15, 2024
Arada grafik romanlar okumaktan büyük keyif alıyorım In Limbo beni hayal kırıklığına uğratmayan kitaplardan oldu. Yazarın kendi hayatı olduğundan son derece içten yazılmış ve çizilmiş bir kitap. Kimlik, aidiyet, anne-kız ilişkisi, ırkçılık gibi konuları büyüme çağı içerisinde irdeliyor. Güney Kore ve Amerikalı olmasının kendisinde oluşturduğu bölünmüşlüğü hayatının merkezinde. Kendi kültüründen uzaklaşırken ne yapması gerektiğini de sorgular hale geliyor. Annesini memnun mu etmeli yoksa sevdiği işlerin peşinden gitmekte ısrarcı mı olmalı? Çizimleri inanılmaz güzeldi hatta kendi hayatını anlatmasından çok çizimleri beğendim. Arada kalmışlığı o ‘araf’ hissini güzel aktarabilmiş.
September 21, 2023
Quality Rating: Five Stars
Enjoyment Rating: Four Stars
Sometimes you just find stories that seem to be calling out from a void in a voice you recognise, even if it comes from a completely different situation. And those few tones you recognise pull you through to learn even more about things you have never (and never will) experience. In Limbo is a beautifully rendered and blatantly honest and empathetic coming of age drama, one that speaks to so much universal experience, and commands attention for the experiences kept silent for a long time. I cried, and felt comforted, and angry, and upset, and hopeful. Unforgettable.
Enjoyment Rating: Four Stars
Sometimes you just find stories that seem to be calling out from a void in a voice you recognise, even if it comes from a completely different situation. And those few tones you recognise pull you through to learn even more about things you have never (and never will) experience. In Limbo is a beautifully rendered and blatantly honest and empathetic coming of age drama, one that speaks to so much universal experience, and commands attention for the experiences kept silent for a long time. I cried, and felt comforted, and angry, and upset, and hopeful. Unforgettable.
November 6, 2024
#koreliannelerkapatılsın
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
April 6, 2024
this is a gorgeous graphic novel/memoir that carries so much sweeping emotional weight to it. very stunning, i especially love the blue tone of the art - it really helps build the atmosphere/tone. it uses a lot of still, quiet moments to really build up the story which gives it an almost cinematic quality. so good!
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