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Keeping You a Secret
With a steady boyfriend, the position of Student Council President, and a chance to go to an Ivy League college, high school life is just fine for Holland Jaeger.
At least, it seems to be.
But when Cece Goddard comes to school, everything changes. Cece and Holland have undeniable feelings for each other, but how will others react to their developing relationship?
At least, it seems to be.
But when Cece Goddard comes to school, everything changes. Cece and Holland have undeniable feelings for each other, but how will others react to their developing relationship?
250 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2003
About the author
Julie Anne Peters
27 books1,701 followersJulie Anne Peters was born in Jamestown, New York. When she was five, her family moved to the Denver suburbs in Colorado. Her parents divorced when she was in high school. She has three siblings: a brother, John, and two younger sisters, Jeanne and Susan.
Her books for young adults include Define "Normal" (2000), Keeping You a Secret (2003), Luna (2004), Far from Xanadu (2005), Between Mom and Jo (2006), grl2grl (2007), Rage: A Love Story (2009), By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead (2010), She Loves Me, She Loves Me Not... (2011), It's Our Prom (So Deal with It) (2012), and Lies My Girlfriend Told Me (2014). Her young adult fiction often feature lesbian characters and address LGBT issues. She has announced that she has retired from writing, and Lies My Girlfriend Told Me will be her last novel. She now works full-time for the Colorado Reading Corps.
Her books for young adults include Define "Normal" (2000), Keeping You a Secret (2003), Luna (2004), Far from Xanadu (2005), Between Mom and Jo (2006), grl2grl (2007), Rage: A Love Story (2009), By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead (2010), She Loves Me, She Loves Me Not... (2011), It's Our Prom (So Deal with It) (2012), and Lies My Girlfriend Told Me (2014). Her young adult fiction often feature lesbian characters and address LGBT issues. She has announced that she has retired from writing, and Lies My Girlfriend Told Me will be her last novel. She now works full-time for the Colorado Reading Corps.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 1,483 reviews
September 16, 2013
I have been reading a few lesbian romance novels lately and haven't written a review on them because I was kind of hoping they would just fly under the radar here on goodreads and not get noticed. I'm sure that anyone that knows me, and knows that I am a 29 year old straight man will probably think that I'm just reading them because I'm a dirty old pervert who wants to read about two women together. If that's what you think then you are only about 5% right, the thing is I grew up on horror. That's all I ever watched, listened to, our read, but I have always loved a good love story mixed into them. I recently started reading romance and it only takes a handful to get the basic layout of a romance novel, two people meet, fall in love, face some kind of obstacle or something that gets between them and makes their relationship difficult and the harder they have to fight to be together the more they must love each other and the happier the ending is. Well, who has to fight harder than a same sex couple? Who has more trials and tribulations and has to make more sacrifices? It's all to easy for a boy and girl to meet and say they are in love and then a week later be in love with someone else and it don't matter because nothing really changes but read this novel here and see exactly how much her life had to change to admit her love for cece and you know that it is real true love because she is willing to risk everything for her and when she loses so much she never once regrets it. I imagine a m/m romance would appeal in the same way but I'm more comfortable reading about two women so that's where the other 5% comes in but before you judge me to harshly just keep in mind that they are all ya romance that I have been reading lately and any sex in them is not explicit and only used the way it should be which is show the intimacy and love between two people.
November 3, 2010
i know all of you are off writing your damn novels this month, but don't forget to support me in my own writing project: NaReWriMo, where i write reviews for teen fiction and you all applaud my brave attempts to keep up despite finding it harder and harder to be charming as every book underwhelms me and i am forced to resort to gimmickry like adding soundtracks; a different song to each paragraph.
this is my last gay teen novel for class, so i wish i could be all flamboyant and anthemic and proud about reviewing it, but this book, like all others on this syllabus, was just all right. i just have no frame of reference for this. not the gay part - i'm not picky about gender when it comes to the grown-up game, but i just find it mind-boggling that kids still take shit for being gay in high school. when i was in high school a billion years ago, no one cared about it at all - we had the requisite number of gay field hockey and softball players, but the cheerleading squad had at least one,too, and maybe i just work too close to the harvey milk high school so i am just seeing a sea of gay or gay-tolerant kids, but these kids seem pretty confident and open and are making out all over my store, without seeming too shy about self-identification.
out and proud, yes. classy, no.
but i know it's not the way the whole country is; i do hear the news stories. so i suppose books like this; books in which a popular, pretty, femmy girl with a "great" boyfriend and a bright future meets a girl and sparks fly and the rest of the school... recedes in horror, along with her family. the mother character in this is so grotesque. i'm sure there are women like this out there, i just haven't met them, and i do not want to. but i know, i know there are women who only want their daughters to be husbanded and white-dressed and breeding all the time. and for them, this disappointment must be shattering and justifies banishment. but - wow. she's really a terrible mother.
but here's the thing. i hate cece.(the young lesbian who moves into town and takes this girl on a magic carpet ride of same-sex escapades) hate her. if i went to high school with her, i would totally be in the group tagging her locker. i wouldn't slash her tires, because that's just wrong, but she really annoyed me. not because she was gay, but because she was so one-dimensional about it. really, every day you have to wear a different lesbian t-shirt or hat or license-plate holder?? you have no other facet to your personality?? i know you're young, but get a hobby, play a sport, don't just be a walking billboard for your sex life. this would piss me off no matter the t-shirt monotony: broadway musical, animal rights activists, norwegian death metal bands. i get it, you fuck girls, now move along before i yawn myself to death...
i don't know, i guess for people who don't have a support system, this book is awesome - it gives advice for where to go for help if you lose your home, and gives strength for girls just coming out into potentially difficult situations, but for me, it was pretty boring. except when they fool around in the back of the donut shop and they are all cinnamon-smelling and sticky. but i may have just been hungry.
this is my last gay teen novel for class, so i wish i could be all flamboyant and anthemic and proud about reviewing it, but this book, like all others on this syllabus, was just all right. i just have no frame of reference for this. not the gay part - i'm not picky about gender when it comes to the grown-up game, but i just find it mind-boggling that kids still take shit for being gay in high school. when i was in high school a billion years ago, no one cared about it at all - we had the requisite number of gay field hockey and softball players, but the cheerleading squad had at least one,too, and maybe i just work too close to the harvey milk high school so i am just seeing a sea of gay or gay-tolerant kids, but these kids seem pretty confident and open and are making out all over my store, without seeming too shy about self-identification.
out and proud, yes. classy, no.
but i know it's not the way the whole country is; i do hear the news stories. so i suppose books like this; books in which a popular, pretty, femmy girl with a "great" boyfriend and a bright future meets a girl and sparks fly and the rest of the school... recedes in horror, along with her family. the mother character in this is so grotesque. i'm sure there are women like this out there, i just haven't met them, and i do not want to. but i know, i know there are women who only want their daughters to be husbanded and white-dressed and breeding all the time. and for them, this disappointment must be shattering and justifies banishment. but - wow. she's really a terrible mother.
but here's the thing. i hate cece.(the young lesbian who moves into town and takes this girl on a magic carpet ride of same-sex escapades) hate her. if i went to high school with her, i would totally be in the group tagging her locker. i wouldn't slash her tires, because that's just wrong, but she really annoyed me. not because she was gay, but because she was so one-dimensional about it. really, every day you have to wear a different lesbian t-shirt or hat or license-plate holder?? you have no other facet to your personality?? i know you're young, but get a hobby, play a sport, don't just be a walking billboard for your sex life. this would piss me off no matter the t-shirt monotony: broadway musical, animal rights activists, norwegian death metal bands. i get it, you fuck girls, now move along before i yawn myself to death...
i don't know, i guess for people who don't have a support system, this book is awesome - it gives advice for where to go for help if you lose your home, and gives strength for girls just coming out into potentially difficult situations, but for me, it was pretty boring. except when they fool around in the back of the donut shop and they are all cinnamon-smelling and sticky. but i may have just been hungry.
December 1, 2012
Reviewed by Me for TeensReadToo.com
The second book I've read by Julie Anne Peters, KEEPING YOU A SECRET is another sure-fire winner about the highs and lows of first love, the terror and joy of "coming out", and the good and the bad that is the thing called family.
Holland Jaeger is the "It" girl everyone envies--she has great friends, she's President of the Student Body, she's the girlfriend of Seth, she's the popular girl who can be counted on to always get along with everyone. That is, until Cece Goddard transfers in, and Holland's once-perfect life no longer seems so great.
The first time she sees Cece, Holland feels something that she's never felt before. Although sexually active with her boyfriend, Seth, having sex is more like a chore--she'd much rather sit around talking, the way they used to do when they were friends rather than lovers. As Cece flaunts her homosexuality, wearing shirts proclaiming herself out and proud, Holland wonders what it means when her attraction to Cece becomes almost an obsession.
College looms on the horizon and no one, especially her mother, will quit asking her where she's going. They have big plans for her, you see, both her mother, who became a single parent way too young, Seth, and the career counselor at her school. Forced into a role she doesn't want, Holland escapes into her art class, drawing away from her former friends as feelings and emotions she can't control rush to the surface.
As Holland realizes that she is, in fact, a lesbian, her perfect life is suddenly out of control. She's shunned by her former friends at school, her mother kicks her out of the house, she's forced to live in a run-down motel that's now a shelter, and she's not sure she'll be able to attend college at all.
Holland must learn what's really important in life, that it's not about being popular but about being true to yourself. As she loses old friends she gains new ones in the gay and lesbian community, and forms a bond with Cece that is beyond her wildest expectations.
KEEPING YOU A SECRET is a great, emotional read, pefect for anyone questioning their sexuality or their place in the world. A truly recommended read.
The second book I've read by Julie Anne Peters, KEEPING YOU A SECRET is another sure-fire winner about the highs and lows of first love, the terror and joy of "coming out", and the good and the bad that is the thing called family.
Holland Jaeger is the "It" girl everyone envies--she has great friends, she's President of the Student Body, she's the girlfriend of Seth, she's the popular girl who can be counted on to always get along with everyone. That is, until Cece Goddard transfers in, and Holland's once-perfect life no longer seems so great.
The first time she sees Cece, Holland feels something that she's never felt before. Although sexually active with her boyfriend, Seth, having sex is more like a chore--she'd much rather sit around talking, the way they used to do when they were friends rather than lovers. As Cece flaunts her homosexuality, wearing shirts proclaiming herself out and proud, Holland wonders what it means when her attraction to Cece becomes almost an obsession.
College looms on the horizon and no one, especially her mother, will quit asking her where she's going. They have big plans for her, you see, both her mother, who became a single parent way too young, Seth, and the career counselor at her school. Forced into a role she doesn't want, Holland escapes into her art class, drawing away from her former friends as feelings and emotions she can't control rush to the surface.
As Holland realizes that she is, in fact, a lesbian, her perfect life is suddenly out of control. She's shunned by her former friends at school, her mother kicks her out of the house, she's forced to live in a run-down motel that's now a shelter, and she's not sure she'll be able to attend college at all.
Holland must learn what's really important in life, that it's not about being popular but about being true to yourself. As she loses old friends she gains new ones in the gay and lesbian community, and forms a bond with Cece that is beyond her wildest expectations.
KEEPING YOU A SECRET is a great, emotional read, pefect for anyone questioning their sexuality or their place in the world. A truly recommended read.
October 23, 2013
I really didn't like this book!
It was given to me by a friend who figured I'd like it because I like girls, too.
How wrong they were.
Cece doesn't seem like any person I know or would encounyer, as I doubt anyone is quite that out there about being, well, out. That didn't bother me so much as just how manipulative Cece was as the story progressed.
She seemed to not even care about Holland, just so long as she had her own place that she could crash at. The "big reveal" about a previous girlfriend who had broken Cece's heart was predictable and childish, despite how grown she tries to present herself.
Cece skeeved me out, with her constant talk about needing Holland (and vice versa), and the two expressing how they "couldn't live without each other."
I read this in a day, and it just didn't sit well with me, and I hope I'm not the only one who picked up on the abusive/manipulative undertones and realised how unhealthy and dangerous their relationship was.
I can appreciate the book helping some people come out to their parents, but it is not a healthy thing for young queer kiddos to read, as far as learning about healthy relationships go.
It was given to me by a friend who figured I'd like it because I like girls, too.
How wrong they were.
Cece doesn't seem like any person I know or would encounyer, as I doubt anyone is quite that out there about being, well, out. That didn't bother me so much as just how manipulative Cece was as the story progressed.
She seemed to not even care about Holland, just so long as she had her own place that she could crash at. The "big reveal" about a previous girlfriend who had broken Cece's heart was predictable and childish, despite how grown she tries to present herself.
Cece skeeved me out, with her constant talk about needing Holland (and vice versa), and the two expressing how they "couldn't live without each other."
I read this in a day, and it just didn't sit well with me, and I hope I'm not the only one who picked up on the abusive/manipulative undertones and realised how unhealthy and dangerous their relationship was.
I can appreciate the book helping some people come out to their parents, but it is not a healthy thing for young queer kiddos to read, as far as learning about healthy relationships go.
January 27, 2009
Reading through the YA fiction available for GLBTQ readers has been a somewhat disappointing experience. I would really give book this book 2.5 stars because there are some things the book does right, but really I can only classify it as "okay."
While the topic in this book is really important, I would love to see it handled by a truly skilled writer such as Laurie Halse Anderson. The writing in Keeping You a Secret is just not that great and I'm sorry that GLBTQ YA lit often seems to fall into this category. I imagine readers are so desperate to see themselves reflected in the literature, that books like this are given a lot more credit than they deserve.
What the book does wrong: unrealistic/flat characterizations, a jerky start that left me a bit confused and questioning whether I wanted to read on and terribly corny slang. I actually wrote down a list of offending phrases that I doubt have ever been uttered by the lips of a high school senior (except perhaps in an ironic way) including: "wastoid, goon, shudder city, no way - way!, shiver city, and hangdog."
I checked the copyright date, preparing to excuse Peters for the silly expressions. However, it was published in 2003 so there really is no good explanation.
While the topic in this book is really important, I would love to see it handled by a truly skilled writer such as Laurie Halse Anderson. The writing in Keeping You a Secret is just not that great and I'm sorry that GLBTQ YA lit often seems to fall into this category. I imagine readers are so desperate to see themselves reflected in the literature, that books like this are given a lot more credit than they deserve.
What the book does wrong: unrealistic/flat characterizations, a jerky start that left me a bit confused and questioning whether I wanted to read on and terribly corny slang. I actually wrote down a list of offending phrases that I doubt have ever been uttered by the lips of a high school senior (except perhaps in an ironic way) including: "wastoid, goon, shudder city, no way - way!, shiver city, and hangdog."
I checked the copyright date, preparing to excuse Peters for the silly expressions. However, it was published in 2003 so there really is no good explanation.
November 15, 2009
i'm on a semi-professional kick of reading books with young protagonists dealing with sexual awakening. it's semi-professional because, while i'm slated to teach a class about teens' sexuality, teaching is never far from the soft nub of my life, and i tend to teach what my mind is working at figuring out at the time. managing to do this requires a constant whirlwind of reading-list changes and in-between-semesters reading -- my mind re-adjusts its focus constantly, and even a tiny little adjustment is enough to throw into the shadows everything that's familiar and bring into sharpness unknown realities -- but it works for me. i understand my life (better) by teaching books that deal with some raw-pink aspects of it, and i understand things better when i discuss them with others.
the problem here is that i have intentionally avoided books focused on kids and especially kids' sexuality like the plague, because i've always found them profoundly uninteresting. beware of the topics that cause a strong negative reaction in you! so i'm reading and thinking and exploring like crazy, and some of it is dizzying and exhilarating, and some of it is devastating.
i owe my realization that i do indeed like books about kids to The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time , and my realization that i like books about kids' sexuality to rigoberto gilb's lovely and brilliant The Flowers . also about kids' sexuality, i'm now reading the astonishing (i keep checking that this is indeed only this author's SECOND NOVEL) Animal's People , as slowly as i can manage because such depth and intelligence deserve savoring. and i just gobbled up the dark but fabulous graphic novel Skim .
on the other hand, i read Keeping You a Secret in two goes and i'd probably give it an "it's okay" two-star rating if it weren't a pioneering book that caused its author to come out (again) in a way she hadn't anticipated or planned. hence, one star for courage.
Secret is a formulaic book with a competent but rather pedestrian writing style and a series of predictable moves. the characters are depthless and the only aspect of their lives and minds that gets addressed is their nuts and bolts desire -- mostly their sexual desire, or lack thereof. the books i mention above deal with kids' desire in the context of the immense complexity of their lives. this is the time, after all, when we discover our capacity for independence and deviousness, our potential for originality, and our ability-slash-inability to mold our own place in the world, and negotiate these thrilling and terrifying realities with the need we still feel for protection and guidance.
sexuality and sexual desire (and all the issues related to sexual expectations and conformity) are only one facet of all this, or, maybe, its most visible, compelling, driving representative.
that julie anne peters focuses on sexuality without much attention to what it represents and is linked to makes her book pornographic. which, by the way, Secret most definitely isn't, because all sexual scenes are only guessing objects, and, if i'm correct, the only explicit description we get of any sexual act at all is contained in the adjective "soft" in connection to the protagonist holland's and her paramour cece's first kiss.
** SPOILER **
this is the one book in the list i offered that devastated instead of exhilarated me. part of it is what i just said -- the barren pornographic nature of it. another part of it is the drab writing. the occasion, though, that made the desolation real and stark and material for me was the moment when holland's mother, upon discovering that holland is sleeping with cece, goes completely berserk and gives her exactly two minutes to pack her stuff and get out of the house. this is a tremendously shocking moment because, until then, nothing in the novel had given us the impression that holland's mother might even be capable of such irrational inhumanity. holland's household is blandly normal: the step-father is a benign if colorless figure, the mother is portrayed as wanting to get her daughter's life right because she couldn't do it with her own, but this is represented in terms of wanting her to go to a good college, something holland is resisting because she is not sure of (and no one is interested in) what she really wants. true, holland's mother got pregnant with holland and had to drop out of a more fulfilling life to raise her when she was a teen, and if this makes holland feel less than, you know, wanted, it also impacts her external life minimally. she is free to come and go as she pleases, to spend the night with her boyfriend, and lead her own life with basically no interference from her mother (except for the college thing, which is an object of constant nagging).
** MORE SPOILING **
so i saw the cruel homophobia of holland's mother as coming out of left field. it's even more astounding that there is no reconciliation at all before the novel's end. in one swift stroke she excises her daughter from her life. she changes the locks of the house, doesn't know where she's staying, throws away her stuff (!), takes her money (!!!), and doesn't want her back unless she leaves cece. really, out of control.
parental homophobia is a fabulously interesting topic, but peters does nothing to help us understand it. she just hits us in the gut with it, and it hurts something awful. you wonder, was this girl ever loved? and have no way to answer because the novel's bi-dimensional characters give you nowhere to go. yet holland seems remarkably well adjusted. she deals with her life well. she's an excellent student, a tireless swimmer, deals with breaking up with her boyfriend really well, deals with her discovery of her gayness really well, loves selflessly, is kind to her family... given what happens, and the obvious roots of it, you have to ask: where is this girl's rage? but peters doesn't give you rage. she gives you a nice kid with a crazy mother and no explanation for it.
the pornography of Secret is in all the emotions the book evokes in you without giving you any lead in how to interpret them and put them to good use in your life. which, in a YA novel, seems particularly shameful.
okay, i've just talked myself out of teaching it.
the problem here is that i have intentionally avoided books focused on kids and especially kids' sexuality like the plague, because i've always found them profoundly uninteresting. beware of the topics that cause a strong negative reaction in you! so i'm reading and thinking and exploring like crazy, and some of it is dizzying and exhilarating, and some of it is devastating.
i owe my realization that i do indeed like books about kids to The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time , and my realization that i like books about kids' sexuality to rigoberto gilb's lovely and brilliant The Flowers . also about kids' sexuality, i'm now reading the astonishing (i keep checking that this is indeed only this author's SECOND NOVEL) Animal's People , as slowly as i can manage because such depth and intelligence deserve savoring. and i just gobbled up the dark but fabulous graphic novel Skim .
on the other hand, i read Keeping You a Secret in two goes and i'd probably give it an "it's okay" two-star rating if it weren't a pioneering book that caused its author to come out (again) in a way she hadn't anticipated or planned. hence, one star for courage.
Secret is a formulaic book with a competent but rather pedestrian writing style and a series of predictable moves. the characters are depthless and the only aspect of their lives and minds that gets addressed is their nuts and bolts desire -- mostly their sexual desire, or lack thereof. the books i mention above deal with kids' desire in the context of the immense complexity of their lives. this is the time, after all, when we discover our capacity for independence and deviousness, our potential for originality, and our ability-slash-inability to mold our own place in the world, and negotiate these thrilling and terrifying realities with the need we still feel for protection and guidance.
sexuality and sexual desire (and all the issues related to sexual expectations and conformity) are only one facet of all this, or, maybe, its most visible, compelling, driving representative.
that julie anne peters focuses on sexuality without much attention to what it represents and is linked to makes her book pornographic. which, by the way, Secret most definitely isn't, because all sexual scenes are only guessing objects, and, if i'm correct, the only explicit description we get of any sexual act at all is contained in the adjective "soft" in connection to the protagonist holland's and her paramour cece's first kiss.
** SPOILER **
this is the one book in the list i offered that devastated instead of exhilarated me. part of it is what i just said -- the barren pornographic nature of it. another part of it is the drab writing. the occasion, though, that made the desolation real and stark and material for me was the moment when holland's mother, upon discovering that holland is sleeping with cece, goes completely berserk and gives her exactly two minutes to pack her stuff and get out of the house. this is a tremendously shocking moment because, until then, nothing in the novel had given us the impression that holland's mother might even be capable of such irrational inhumanity. holland's household is blandly normal: the step-father is a benign if colorless figure, the mother is portrayed as wanting to get her daughter's life right because she couldn't do it with her own, but this is represented in terms of wanting her to go to a good college, something holland is resisting because she is not sure of (and no one is interested in) what she really wants. true, holland's mother got pregnant with holland and had to drop out of a more fulfilling life to raise her when she was a teen, and if this makes holland feel less than, you know, wanted, it also impacts her external life minimally. she is free to come and go as she pleases, to spend the night with her boyfriend, and lead her own life with basically no interference from her mother (except for the college thing, which is an object of constant nagging).
** MORE SPOILING **
so i saw the cruel homophobia of holland's mother as coming out of left field. it's even more astounding that there is no reconciliation at all before the novel's end. in one swift stroke she excises her daughter from her life. she changes the locks of the house, doesn't know where she's staying, throws away her stuff (!), takes her money (!!!), and doesn't want her back unless she leaves cece. really, out of control.
parental homophobia is a fabulously interesting topic, but peters does nothing to help us understand it. she just hits us in the gut with it, and it hurts something awful. you wonder, was this girl ever loved? and have no way to answer because the novel's bi-dimensional characters give you nowhere to go. yet holland seems remarkably well adjusted. she deals with her life well. she's an excellent student, a tireless swimmer, deals with breaking up with her boyfriend really well, deals with her discovery of her gayness really well, loves selflessly, is kind to her family... given what happens, and the obvious roots of it, you have to ask: where is this girl's rage? but peters doesn't give you rage. she gives you a nice kid with a crazy mother and no explanation for it.
the pornography of Secret is in all the emotions the book evokes in you without giving you any lead in how to interpret them and put them to good use in your life. which, in a YA novel, seems particularly shameful.
okay, i've just talked myself out of teaching it.
December 10, 2014
Poorly executed. Characters lacked, and the romance was terrible. There has to be better LGBT books out there than this. Besides the so-so writing, this book promotes stalking and abusive relationships (friendships and boyfriends/girlfriends).
I would not recommend this book to anyone, and this is coming from someone who donates monthly to HRC.
I would not recommend this book to anyone, and this is coming from someone who donates monthly to HRC.
October 25, 2010
when i first bought this book from the store i didnt read the back cover or the first page. I just thought the title was interesting and decided to give it a chance. To be honest, looking at it during first glance i thought the cover was of a boy and a girl and didn't even realize it was a gay couple. Reading the first few pages i was alittle skeptic on weither i'd like it or not because id never read anything like it before. It turned out to be one of the most beautiful and amazing stories i have ever read, i found myself laughing, crying, gasping, yelling, and finishing the book within an hour or two. I really felt for the main character as she strugled with trying to discover her sexuality and eventually come out to her friends and family. Her story was really amazing and inspiring and quite sad as she struggled to deal with the feelings of her mother and her thoughts of what was right and what was wrong. I'd totally recommend this to anyone and id have to say it is one of the best books ever.
December 24, 2018
This is an outstanding story. The writing is second to none, emotions are so raw they are palpable. My biggest let down was the abrupt ending, hence four stars instead of five.
I guess this is one of those stories where the reader gets to decide what becomes of the characters.
I guess this is one of those stories where the reader gets to decide what becomes of the characters.
July 4, 2014
This book is quite literally awful. I recognize it is for, what, 13 year olds but it makes me feel weird that she is writing about seniors in high school in the absolutely most juvenile way. I tried, I really did, to think of my 13-year-old self and what reading a book like this could have meant to me. Unfortunately, I read far better stories with far better LGBT characters as a 13-year-old. Not many, but enough for me to know this isn't my only option.
The writing is terrible. She uses words that do not make sense in the context or are just awkward. Who sneers on a page-by-page basis? Evil eyes?? The storyline itself is just not well put together. It is choppy in terms of development. None of the characters are particularly compelling or interesting. I like Winslow and Faith the best. Holland and Cece are ridiculous. Holland has that whole "I'm a mess but I'm actually perfect" trope going on that I find quite irritating. Overworked characters.
Everything is extremely, extremely dramatic. True love is instantaneous. Rejection is horrific. All of these things happen but the story is so choppily written it makes it seem worthy of eye rolls.
I'm always on the lookout for LGBT characters because it is so necessary, but this one is absurd. I do not remember reading stuff like this as a 13 year old and when I did, I hated it, too. LGBT stories need to be told. This one is cliche and annoying. I haven't been 13 in a long while so maybe I'm overestimating what a 13-year-old would enjoy reading, but this would not be my guess. I think it's demeaning to think youth should be compelled by this kind of book. I hope it does help kids out though.
The one thing that redeems it for me is that there is good information. Delivered in a preachy way but it talks about LGBT resource centers, housing, employment, what to do in these tragic situations where youth lose their support systems. I also liked some of Cece's t-shirts. Especially "I have a queer conscience-do you?"
The writing is terrible. She uses words that do not make sense in the context or are just awkward. Who sneers on a page-by-page basis? Evil eyes?? The storyline itself is just not well put together. It is choppy in terms of development. None of the characters are particularly compelling or interesting. I like Winslow and Faith the best. Holland and Cece are ridiculous. Holland has that whole "I'm a mess but I'm actually perfect" trope going on that I find quite irritating. Overworked characters.
Everything is extremely, extremely dramatic. True love is instantaneous. Rejection is horrific. All of these things happen but the story is so choppily written it makes it seem worthy of eye rolls.
I'm always on the lookout for LGBT characters because it is so necessary, but this one is absurd. I do not remember reading stuff like this as a 13 year old and when I did, I hated it, too. LGBT stories need to be told. This one is cliche and annoying. I haven't been 13 in a long while so maybe I'm overestimating what a 13-year-old would enjoy reading, but this would not be my guess. I think it's demeaning to think youth should be compelled by this kind of book. I hope it does help kids out though.
The one thing that redeems it for me is that there is good information. Delivered in a preachy way but it talks about LGBT resource centers, housing, employment, what to do in these tragic situations where youth lose their support systems. I also liked some of Cece's t-shirts. Especially "I have a queer conscience-do you?"
July 2, 2013
This is a story about a girl that loved a girl and lost everything because of it... and BECAME. Many call this a coming of age story, but its far more than that. This is a true account of what really happens still today. Holland found herself when she met a girl that changed everything that she knew and allowed her to be her true self. But as many discovered this secret, she found herself left by all that she once called friend, and all she loved as family. When all was said and done, the one that remained and never turned away was the girl she kissed one night.....
Its amazing to me how many reviews on the book by people that have never experienced a coming out, either self, friend, or parent, are oblivious to how many kids become homeless after coming out to their parents. This is an ongoing problems that is true and happens ever single day. So for all those who continue to write reviews about this book stating that NO parent, NO mother would ever do what the mother is this book did to her daughter are wearing blinders. This does happen.
Its amazing to me how many reviews on the book by people that have never experienced a coming out, either self, friend, or parent, are oblivious to how many kids become homeless after coming out to their parents. This is an ongoing problems that is true and happens ever single day. So for all those who continue to write reviews about this book stating that NO parent, NO mother would ever do what the mother is this book did to her daughter are wearing blinders. This does happen.
March 29, 2023
Well written story about a young woman's journey in discovering love and herself and how fraught that can be. I enjoyed this one.
Update 30 March 2023. Sad to see Ms Peters has died recently. Her writing and voice will be missed.
Update 30 March 2023. Sad to see Ms Peters has died recently. Her writing and voice will be missed.
March 28, 2023
4.5 STARS
Fifteen years ago, when KEEPING YOU A SECRET was first published, mainstream publishing house rarely distributed LGBT literature. Julie Ann Peters’s writing changed that with her stories that appealed to all YA readers, not just the LGBT community.
Because in the USA, progress toward not just accepting, but embracing sexual minorities as mainstream, KEEPING YOU A SECRET is dated. Teens like Holland are still kicked out of their homes for their sexual orientation and as a society we still have a long way to go but I have lived fifty years of change and growth and I am encouraged.
I enjoyed rereading KEEPING YOU A SECRET a second time, the first was when this book was initially published in the early 2000s. The ending was too abrupt for me, although I can see why Peters finished as she did.
The audiobook was well-narrated.
Fifteen years ago, when KEEPING YOU A SECRET was first published, mainstream publishing house rarely distributed LGBT literature. Julie Ann Peters’s writing changed that with her stories that appealed to all YA readers, not just the LGBT community.
Because in the USA, progress toward not just accepting, but embracing sexual minorities as mainstream, KEEPING YOU A SECRET is dated. Teens like Holland are still kicked out of their homes for their sexual orientation and as a society we still have a long way to go but I have lived fifty years of change and growth and I am encouraged.
I enjoyed rereading KEEPING YOU A SECRET a second time, the first was when this book was initially published in the early 2000s. The ending was too abrupt for me, although I can see why Peters finished as she did.
The audiobook was well-narrated.
Read
June 6, 2018I don't usually read YA but characterizing this book as such would be missing the point. This book makes one realize the harsh realities of life for anyone that doesn't conform to the social norm. It is quite disturbing how backward thinking many people are when it comes to sexuality and sexual orientations despite decades of progress in personal freedom and civil liberties. The book is not a warning against coming out but it describes in no uncertain terms what this could mean in real life.
But above all it is a book about love. And it elegantly presents the argument that we fall in love with persons not sexes. The shame is in our society that cannot still accept this simple fact.
But above all it is a book about love. And it elegantly presents the argument that we fall in love with persons not sexes. The shame is in our society that cannot still accept this simple fact.
Read
February 22, 201807.07.17 update:
Goodreads says that I read this in 2014 and gave it 5 stars but I have literally NO MEMORY of this book whatsoever. Is it worth getting a copy for rereading purposes or was I just really easily impressed by lesbian rep a few years ago?
Goodreads says that I read this in 2014 and gave it 5 stars but I have literally NO MEMORY of this book whatsoever. Is it worth getting a copy for rereading purposes or was I just really easily impressed by lesbian rep a few years ago?
August 31, 2016
When I saw it on Amazon.com when I was looking for books one or two years ago, I had no idea it was a GLBT novel. Although, I read GLBT fan fictions, reading a novel about sexuality is just refreshing.
This book gave me some sort of connection to Holland. I can identify myself with her in terms of just being who I want to be. It's hard to live on people's expectations that once you've got the freedom of doing what you want, you don't know what you would do with it.
Julie Anne Peters showed in this book that the teenage years is the hardest part of life, especially when it comes to gender identity. People reasons out that "it's just a phase", when it's clear as daylight that being gay, lesbian, bisexual or other gender identity is not a phase if the person really knows in his-/herself that s/he is not straight.
This maybe a coming-of-age book, but I think parents should read this, too. See the perspective of a teenager who is going through this stage in their life through the POV of Holland in the book. Parents are the one who should show acceptance on what their children chooses to be.
Also, I was disappointed at the ending. I was hoping that I would read somewhere (or maybe I just missed it out) who outed Holland to her mother and if Holland and Cece is finally free to be just be and show people that they're just two people in love despite their sexuality. But, I guess, it's up to me and other readers to create or think of how we want the story to end.
This book gave me some sort of connection to Holland. I can identify myself with her in terms of just being who I want to be. It's hard to live on people's expectations that once you've got the freedom of doing what you want, you don't know what you would do with it.
Julie Anne Peters showed in this book that the teenage years is the hardest part of life, especially when it comes to gender identity. People reasons out that "it's just a phase", when it's clear as daylight that being gay, lesbian, bisexual or other gender identity is not a phase if the person really knows in his-/herself that s/he is not straight.
This maybe a coming-of-age book, but I think parents should read this, too. See the perspective of a teenager who is going through this stage in their life through the POV of Holland in the book. Parents are the one who should show acceptance on what their children chooses to be.
Also, I was disappointed at the ending. I was hoping that I would read somewhere (or maybe I just missed it out) who outed Holland to her mother and if Holland and Cece is finally free to be just be and show people that they're just two people in love despite their sexuality. But, I guess, it's up to me and other readers to create or think of how we want the story to end.
November 27, 2017
Damn, I knew I shouldn't have read this. I read to escape and this was a booby-trapped escape pod hurtling straight back to the past. While it was a good book and Holland's journey is nail-bitingly captivating, it is not an easy read. I suppose that's another thing in it's favour - if it was an easy read it wouldn't be getting the reviews and acclaim that it is.
Peters has captured the confusion, the clarity and the fear brilliantly. She has also managed to create a sense of hope and strength in her characters. Would it have helped when I was a teenager? Probably.
Peters has captured the confusion, the clarity and the fear brilliantly. She has also managed to create a sense of hope and strength in her characters. Would it have helped when I was a teenager? Probably.
November 6, 2013
If you don't know what this book is about, then beware that my review contains general spoilers about the topic, although I avoid specific spoilers about events in the story.
Keeping You a Secret is a coming of age story that is humorous, thought-provoking, and at times traumatic. I read somewhere that it could be considered a modern update to the classic Annie on My Mind, and I did see some similarities: they are both written in first person by a protagonist who is president of the student council, a college-bound senior worried about acceptance, and someone who does not think of herself as gay until she starts falling for a girl she just met. However, there are important differences. For one, this story takes place 25 years later, which allows for a more immediate and open discussion of same-sex relationships. Student councils not only can say the word "gay" in this modern setting, they can consider the funding of gay student clubs in schools. Now young women don't just have awareness of being lesbians, they wear shirts to school that say "out! and proud!". Another difference is that the main character already has a boyfriend, which increases the tension of the story quite a bit, and adds a level of complexity not present in the earlier Annie on My Mind.
I really liked Holland, the main character, as she seemed to have just the right mix of common sense and naivety, integrity and compulsion, earnestness and rebelliousness. The humor really came through in her narration, and her irritation at the obstacles in her life felt like realistic teen ravings without resorting to snarkiness. She was not perfect, and I was able to identify with her as someone who was struggling to understand herself and the rules of her world.
The issues of same-sex relationships come to the foreground fairly quickly, and I really appreciated the time the characters spent thinking about the various aspects of this still-controversial topic. The events and characters in the story world seemed to match my experience of the real world, which is that the climate can turn on a dime from casual acceptance to violent hostility. Throughout the book, we experience some uplifting moments as well as moments of traumatic cruelty, and each had their place in the story.
I thought the storyline with the boyfriend, Seth, was done well and realistically. It didn't seem contrived and brought to focus many of the real issues young adults struggle with as they balance romantic connections and the formation of their identity. Seth and many of the secondary characters all seemed to have real depth, and were not just placeholders or stereotypes.
I read this at the same time that I read the older classic, Annie on My Mind which I reviewed here, and I was more impressed with Keeping You a Secret as a whole. It had a really strong emotional impact for me, and I thought the main character went a lot further in understanding herself and her priorities. Also, I felt this book more thoroughly explored the issues of same-sex relationships and their acceptance in our society, allowing the reader to form a deeper connection to the topic. Of course, it didn't hurt that it was written more recently, as it was easier to connect to the language and the day-to-day activities of the characters.
Keeping You a Secret immediately became one of my favorites, and I would highly recommend this novel as a sometimes fun, sometimes harrowing coming of age story, exploring the complexities of gay relationships in our society. While I didn't rave quite as much about Annie on My Mind, it is also a beautiful, recommended book, worth reading if you are looking to add to your reading list in this genre.
Keeping You a Secret is a coming of age story that is humorous, thought-provoking, and at times traumatic. I read somewhere that it could be considered a modern update to the classic Annie on My Mind, and I did see some similarities: they are both written in first person by a protagonist who is president of the student council, a college-bound senior worried about acceptance, and someone who does not think of herself as gay until she starts falling for a girl she just met. However, there are important differences. For one, this story takes place 25 years later, which allows for a more immediate and open discussion of same-sex relationships. Student councils not only can say the word "gay" in this modern setting, they can consider the funding of gay student clubs in schools. Now young women don't just have awareness of being lesbians, they wear shirts to school that say "out! and proud!". Another difference is that the main character already has a boyfriend, which increases the tension of the story quite a bit, and adds a level of complexity not present in the earlier Annie on My Mind.
I really liked Holland, the main character, as she seemed to have just the right mix of common sense and naivety, integrity and compulsion, earnestness and rebelliousness. The humor really came through in her narration, and her irritation at the obstacles in her life felt like realistic teen ravings without resorting to snarkiness. She was not perfect, and I was able to identify with her as someone who was struggling to understand herself and the rules of her world.
The issues of same-sex relationships come to the foreground fairly quickly, and I really appreciated the time the characters spent thinking about the various aspects of this still-controversial topic. The events and characters in the story world seemed to match my experience of the real world, which is that the climate can turn on a dime from casual acceptance to violent hostility. Throughout the book, we experience some uplifting moments as well as moments of traumatic cruelty, and each had their place in the story.
I thought the storyline with the boyfriend, Seth, was done well and realistically. It didn't seem contrived and brought to focus many of the real issues young adults struggle with as they balance romantic connections and the formation of their identity. Seth and many of the secondary characters all seemed to have real depth, and were not just placeholders or stereotypes.
I read this at the same time that I read the older classic, Annie on My Mind which I reviewed here, and I was more impressed with Keeping You a Secret as a whole. It had a really strong emotional impact for me, and I thought the main character went a lot further in understanding herself and her priorities. Also, I felt this book more thoroughly explored the issues of same-sex relationships and their acceptance in our society, allowing the reader to form a deeper connection to the topic. Of course, it didn't hurt that it was written more recently, as it was easier to connect to the language and the day-to-day activities of the characters.
Keeping You a Secret immediately became one of my favorites, and I would highly recommend this novel as a sometimes fun, sometimes harrowing coming of age story, exploring the complexities of gay relationships in our society. While I didn't rave quite as much about Annie on My Mind, it is also a beautiful, recommended book, worth reading if you are looking to add to your reading list in this genre.
February 5, 2008
Holland is, by all appearances, the perfect high school student. She is student council president, she's taking extra and advanced classes in pursuit of a college scholarship, she's on the swim team, and she has a popular and devoted boyfriend. Despite all this, she feels pressured by her mother, friends, and guidance counselor to pursue a particular kind of life that she's not sure she wants. Everything changes for her one day when CeCe transfers from another school. CeCe is confident, beautiful, and openly gay and Holland feels drawn to get to know her better. I thought that this book was a perfect representation of a novel for teens. It involves a touching and sweet representation of first love, but combines it with all of the uncertainty and awkwardness involved in figuring out who you are and how to be proud of it. Although the romance is between two girls, I don't think that its appeal would be limited to gay and lesbian teens. Everyone who's experienced the agony of growing up, wondering where you fit in, and wondering whether the person you like likes you back will be able to relate to this sensitive and honest book. It certainly spoke to me, and I'm in my thirties and straight. I can only imagine how vividly it would speak to a teen living through those difficult high school years.
September 7, 2023
So I basically read this in a couple of hours. I really wanted to read a lesbian romance, so this was the one I picked. I wasn't the biggest fan of the writing style, it was a little overly contemporary for me, hence the reason I gave this two stars. I did like the main romance. It was sweet, and Cici definitely seemed like a pretty ideal girlfriend. I was not prepared though for how bad the scenes would be with Holland's mother when she threw her out of the house. It was really hard to read, and even though I recognize this is sadly realistic, it would have been nice to have a happy story in which her mother was accepting even if it was hard for her at first. I felt the way the book ended left this unresolved. I also would have liked to see Holland go to college, and become the artist she was meant to be, and go to the prom with Cici. Overall, this was a two star for me. I appreciate the author's effort to write an f/f love story in a world where there aren't many, but this could have been better.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
June 10, 2015
High school senior Holland falls in love with a newly transferred student named CeCe. Initially closeted, together they face the consequences when they are outed.
I have a hard time with YA because I find much of it superficial, but large chunks of this story were very true-to-life and believable. The main character's voice was strong and consistent. The family dynamics and sense of socioeconomic issues were also strong. I was not expecting the ending to be as dramatic as it was, but for the most part I was okay with it because Peters stayed true to the emotional experience of it. I would have liked to see more of their interactions leading up to them dating so I was more willing to buy in. At times I felt the emotions were played up for dramatic effect, and there were a few sections that felt preachy, but it was an easy, good read.
I have a hard time with YA because I find much of it superficial, but large chunks of this story were very true-to-life and believable. The main character's voice was strong and consistent. The family dynamics and sense of socioeconomic issues were also strong. I was not expecting the ending to be as dramatic as it was, but for the most part I was okay with it because Peters stayed true to the emotional experience of it. I would have liked to see more of their interactions leading up to them dating so I was more willing to buy in. At times I felt the emotions were played up for dramatic effect, and there were a few sections that felt preachy, but it was an easy, good read.
June 18, 2018
I hoped I'd like this book, but I didn't. characters were awful, story was bad! I didn't care much about the main character and I think she was stupid! and there was no chemistry between her and Cece at all! this book was just bad!
October 19, 2017
Realistic and lovely to read. It was a fast read, too. A little sad, but sometimes that's how life is.
October 19, 2015
I must confess I was half-expecting something like a revised Annie on my Mind. I would be okay with it, but I am glad it turned out to be something so different…
You are a witness to the change, you can feel the change. Suddenly everything you thought to be true vanishes and you are left with nothing but yourself. This self, though, you don’t recognize its reflection in the mirror… it doesn’t look like you anymore. But what did you look like before? You no longer remember. And suddenly you find yourself having to deal with both the doubts coming from the outside and the ones being born inside. It takes a while to learn how to stop and focus on your inner voice. It’s hard to stop all the background noise from clouding your thoughts, your vision, your path. But once you do… I am okay. You are okay. We are okay. And the journey of self-discovery restarts and it’s so… everything.
I would call this book gentle. It feels that way, even when things get rough. It’s like you are always welcome among these characters. Julie Anne Peters is definitely talented when it comes to making the reader feel comfortable, feel safe, feel at home. I am so glad she took a leap of faith, of courage, and wrote and shared these stories. I am proud and grateful. These books save lives by helping people understand that they are not monsters and that they are not alone.
We can’t be defined by whom we care about. We are human beings in love and that’s something we should cherish and be proud of.
You are a witness to the change, you can feel the change. Suddenly everything you thought to be true vanishes and you are left with nothing but yourself. This self, though, you don’t recognize its reflection in the mirror… it doesn’t look like you anymore. But what did you look like before? You no longer remember. And suddenly you find yourself having to deal with both the doubts coming from the outside and the ones being born inside. It takes a while to learn how to stop and focus on your inner voice. It’s hard to stop all the background noise from clouding your thoughts, your vision, your path. But once you do… I am okay. You are okay. We are okay. And the journey of self-discovery restarts and it’s so… everything.
I would call this book gentle. It feels that way, even when things get rough. It’s like you are always welcome among these characters. Julie Anne Peters is definitely talented when it comes to making the reader feel comfortable, feel safe, feel at home. I am so glad she took a leap of faith, of courage, and wrote and shared these stories. I am proud and grateful. These books save lives by helping people understand that they are not monsters and that they are not alone.
We can’t be defined by whom we care about. We are human beings in love and that’s something we should cherish and be proud of.
February 24, 2021
*3.5
"Until then," she said, "until it's time, I'm keeping you a secret."
It took about the last 30% of this book to really sell it for me.
Keeping you a Secret is a bit of an older f/f book, but it's, very unfortunately, still relevant today.
"Don't cry. Don't you let them see us cry."
This book isn't just about a girl, Holland, falling for another girl, Cece. It's about what they face, together and apart - the bullying and names that Cece faces, the scorn and abuse that Holland is given when she comes out. It's still painfully relevant today.
"A lot of times we imagine these horrible things will happen when we tell them. And they usually don't."
Yeah, I thought. Then there's that time they do.
Part of me wishes that this book took place in an exact year, but I think not being explicit about when it takes place really adds to it - this very well could be ten years or ten days ago.
The whole world could go up in flames as long as Cece emerged from the smoke.
The fault in this book, though, is that the romance isn't very well done. I really can't get over how much this reads like these two stories I wrote when I was younger. The attraction between Holland and Cece is very fast, but the actualities of them falling in love don't feel too real. And, unfortunately, the characters didn't seem very deep.
I did quite like Faith, though. I was thinking she would just be a walking stereotype when they first introduced her, but she was good.
Also, there's this weird part when Holland and Cece first get together where Cece says that she liked Holland from the beginning, which, okay, fine. I don't really love the whole "mysterious love interest was intrigued in plain little MC from the beginning" trope, but whatever. Then Cece says that she didn't have a morning class but would arrive to school early just to spend time with Holland at their lockers. Okay, cute enough. But then that keeps going and saying that Cece basically stalked Holland - she followed her to work, she watched her after school - that's going a little far.
They got it wrong when they called it "the closet." This was a prison. Solitary confinement. I was locked inside, inside myself, dark and afraid and alone.
Most of these lines that I'm using in here, the really good ones, are from around after the 70% mark. It's not until the plot finally starts to catch up that you get these. The writing isn't great up until that point, and I think I might've DNF'ed this if I wasn't committed to finishing what I start.
"The best thing you can do is call yourself a dyke. A lezzie, a lesbo, a queer. All the hateful words, use them in fun. Claim them. Then they can't be used against you."
I do definitely think that this book would help LGBTQ teens. It's just really a shame that the book takes so long to get to that point.
"And it's more. It's about getting past that question of what's wrong with me, to knowing there's nothing wrong, that you were born this way. You're a normal person and a beautiful person and you should be proud of who you are. You deserve to live and live with dignity and show people your pride."
I did quite like the ending, honestly. It didn't perfectly resolve everything, but it tied it up in a nice enough way that I felt very satisfied. 3.5/5 stars.
"Until then," she said, "until it's time, I'm keeping you a secret."
It took about the last 30% of this book to really sell it for me.
Keeping you a Secret is a bit of an older f/f book, but it's, very unfortunately, still relevant today.
"Don't cry. Don't you let them see us cry."
This book isn't just about a girl, Holland, falling for another girl, Cece. It's about what they face, together and apart - the bullying and names that Cece faces, the scorn and abuse that Holland is given when she comes out. It's still painfully relevant today.
"A lot of times we imagine these horrible things will happen when we tell them. And they usually don't."
Yeah, I thought. Then there's that time they do.
Part of me wishes that this book took place in an exact year, but I think not being explicit about when it takes place really adds to it - this very well could be ten years or ten days ago.
The whole world could go up in flames as long as Cece emerged from the smoke.
The fault in this book, though, is that the romance isn't very well done. I really can't get over how much this reads like these two stories I wrote when I was younger. The attraction between Holland and Cece is very fast, but the actualities of them falling in love don't feel too real. And, unfortunately, the characters didn't seem very deep.
I did quite like Faith, though. I was thinking she would just be a walking stereotype when they first introduced her, but she was good.
Also, there's this weird part when Holland and Cece first get together where Cece says that she liked Holland from the beginning, which, okay, fine. I don't really love the whole "mysterious love interest was intrigued in plain little MC from the beginning" trope, but whatever. Then Cece says that she didn't have a morning class but would arrive to school early just to spend time with Holland at their lockers. Okay, cute enough. But then that keeps going and saying that Cece basically stalked Holland - she followed her to work, she watched her after school - that's going a little far.
They got it wrong when they called it "the closet." This was a prison. Solitary confinement. I was locked inside, inside myself, dark and afraid and alone.
Most of these lines that I'm using in here, the really good ones, are from around after the 70% mark. It's not until the plot finally starts to catch up that you get these. The writing isn't great up until that point, and I think I might've DNF'ed this if I wasn't committed to finishing what I start.
"The best thing you can do is call yourself a dyke. A lezzie, a lesbo, a queer. All the hateful words, use them in fun. Claim them. Then they can't be used against you."
I do definitely think that this book would help LGBTQ teens. It's just really a shame that the book takes so long to get to that point.
"And it's more. It's about getting past that question of what's wrong with me, to knowing there's nothing wrong, that you were born this way. You're a normal person and a beautiful person and you should be proud of who you are. You deserve to live and live with dignity and show people your pride."
I did quite like the ending, honestly. It didn't perfectly resolve everything, but it tied it up in a nice enough way that I felt very satisfied. 3.5/5 stars.
February 4, 2016
DNF @ page 58.
That was so disappointing, and I really did want to enjoy it. I stuck through it for just over fifty pages. And wow.
So my biggest issue with this book was the main character, Holland Jaeger. Yeah, that's her actual name. So she is a horrible person whom I would never be friends with. She was rude to basically everyone, especially her "Goth" stepsister. This specifically bothered me because Holland never said why she didn't like her stepsister. She didn't describe her personality at all. She just said she was Goth. Over and over again. So now we have this incredibly judgmental little teenage girl. She is also incredibly mean to her friends. And her boyfriend is in for a surprise when she cheats on him with her new girl crush, Cece Goddard (I didn't make it this far, but where else could this go? Tell me if you have read it and I'm wrong). And Cece. She was supposed to be the exciting, mysterious character that Holland falls in love with or whatever, and I wasn't feeling her character at all. So none of that was working for me.
The other issue I had with this book was that the writing didn't flow for me at all. It was descriptive in all the parts I didn't care about and lacked in all the things I wanted explained.
Finally, Holland and Cece loved the Dixie Chicks. Like, really loved. They thought they were the bee's knees. So that just added to the already substantial reasons for quitting this book. I could have tolerated it if any of the above had not been present. But alas.
(I realize that some people will love this book. That's fine. I don't care. I just didn't like this book. It wasn't horrible, just horrible for me. Thank you. *bows to uproarious applause*)
That was so disappointing, and I really did want to enjoy it. I stuck through it for just over fifty pages. And wow.
So my biggest issue with this book was the main character, Holland Jaeger. Yeah, that's her actual name. So she is a horrible person whom I would never be friends with. She was rude to basically everyone, especially her "Goth" stepsister. This specifically bothered me because Holland never said why she didn't like her stepsister. She didn't describe her personality at all. She just said she was Goth. Over and over again. So now we have this incredibly judgmental little teenage girl. She is also incredibly mean to her friends. And her boyfriend is in for a surprise when she cheats on him with her new girl crush, Cece Goddard (I didn't make it this far, but where else could this go? Tell me if you have read it and I'm wrong). And Cece. She was supposed to be the exciting, mysterious character that Holland falls in love with or whatever, and I wasn't feeling her character at all. So none of that was working for me.
The other issue I had with this book was that the writing didn't flow for me at all. It was descriptive in all the parts I didn't care about and lacked in all the things I wanted explained.
Finally, Holland and Cece loved the Dixie Chicks. Like, really loved. They thought they were the bee's knees. So that just added to the already substantial reasons for quitting this book. I could have tolerated it if any of the above had not been present. But alas.
(I realize that some people will love this book. That's fine. I don't care. I just didn't like this book. It wasn't horrible, just horrible for me. Thank you. *bows to uproarious applause*)
December 3, 2011
I was disappointed in this novel. While it is more contemporary than "Annie on my Mind" in its portrayal of a teen realizing she is a lesbian and starting a relationship with another girl, it paints a truly horrific picture of what could happen if a girl doesn't keep her new-found sexual identity a secret. Holland's mother not only kicks her out of the house, allowing her 10 minutes to pack her belongings in a garbage bag, but she changes the locks on the doors of their home. Although her mother had been ridiculously overbearing about Holland going to a top college, when Holland gets into Stanford, her mother says she won't pay for it. Holland ends up living in a fleabag hotel at the age of 17. What was the point of all this? Would a mother really do such things to her daughter? It simply didn't ring true to me. Moreover, why would a lesbian teenager want to read about such terrible consequences? The book would not likely appeal to hetero teen girls, so I'm not sure what the audience for this book is. David Levithan's "Boy Meets Boy" may be idealistic in its portrayal of a community that is totally accepting of gays and lesbians (not to mention transvestites), but at least it gives its reader hope.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
March 31, 2015
Whenever I found this book here on goodreads, I was excited to read it. I myself struggle with my own sexuality, and decided to read this because I would finally be able to read a book that I could relate with.
Holland Jaegar is a student with a boyfriend and true friends. She is ready to go to college and makes her mother proud for getting the life she never got. Her boyfriend loves her, as they've been dating for about a year.
Then comes along Cece Goddard, the out-and-proud lesbian who just came to the school for some emotional issues at her own school. Holland instantly feels something different about this girl, something she's never felt before.
So without spoiling anything, things go bad for Holland as her relationship with Cece takes off. It effects the futures and friendships of both girls. But hey, love has a will and a way.
I let my girlfriend read this book after I read it and we both constantly argue about who's Holland and who's Cece. XD We also always do the fist-to-our-heart thing like Cece does.
Overall, I loved this book. It's short and simple but has a ton of meaning. Don't be afraid to be who you are <3 READ THIS BOOK OKAY?
Holland Jaegar is a student with a boyfriend and true friends. She is ready to go to college and makes her mother proud for getting the life she never got. Her boyfriend loves her, as they've been dating for about a year.
Then comes along Cece Goddard, the out-and-proud lesbian who just came to the school for some emotional issues at her own school. Holland instantly feels something different about this girl, something she's never felt before.
So without spoiling anything, things go bad for Holland as her relationship with Cece takes off. It effects the futures and friendships of both girls. But hey, love has a will and a way.
I let my girlfriend read this book after I read it and we both constantly argue about who's Holland and who's Cece. XD We also always do the fist-to-our-heart thing like Cece does.
Overall, I loved this book. It's short and simple but has a ton of meaning. Don't be afraid to be who you are <3 READ THIS BOOK OKAY?
July 26, 2016
I really enjoyed this book but I also recognize multiple issues with. Definitely not the best representation, and certainly not original, but I'm a sucker for gay YA. In this book, you basically get a lot of basic tropes you find in many high school coming-out stories, such as the one-dimensional love interest. And then an extreme case of the uhaul lesbian, madly in love, willing to run away from home to live with each other in a still very new relationship.
I wasn't in love with the characters but I liked them enough to feel for them with all the hate received; sympathy with the characters because I understand the hate wasn't fictional and unrealistic. My personal experience, I've been lucky with acceptance for the most part, but many aren't as fortunate.
Above all, it's a story about a girl who finds herself. Discovers her own identity and begins making her own decisions to dictate her own life.
I wasn't in love with the characters but I liked them enough to feel for them with all the hate received; sympathy with the characters because I understand the hate wasn't fictional and unrealistic. My personal experience, I've been lucky with acceptance for the most part, but many aren't as fortunate.
Above all, it's a story about a girl who finds herself. Discovers her own identity and begins making her own decisions to dictate her own life.
June 6, 2014
Initial Thoughts:
There are a couple things with this book that I found a little problematic, but for the most part I just can't bring myself to care all that much because holy shit I just loved it. From beginning to end, I loved it so much I read the damn thing in one sitting and then honest to god hugged the book to my chest when I'd finished. #WeNeedDiverseBooks because I really should've felt so validated and accepted a long time ago. Because it should NOT have taken me 24 years to read a book where, even though their experiences don't exactly match mine, I feel represented. Maybe if I'd read a book like this a long time ago it wouldn't have taking me so long to realise and come to terms with who I really am.Now if I could read a book just like this but with a bi character my life would be complete.
There are a couple things with this book that I found a little problematic, but for the most part I just can't bring myself to care all that much because holy shit I just loved it. From beginning to end, I loved it so much I read the damn thing in one sitting and then honest to god hugged the book to my chest when I'd finished. #WeNeedDiverseBooks because I really should've felt so validated and accepted a long time ago. Because it should NOT have taken me 24 years to read a book where, even though their experiences don't exactly match mine, I feel represented. Maybe if I'd read a book like this a long time ago it wouldn't have taking me so long to realise and come to terms with who I really am.
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