Everand Logo

Welcome to Everand!

  • Discover millions of ebooks, audiobooks, and so much more with a free trial

    Only $9.99/month after trial. Cancel anytime.

    Mind Chess
    Mind Chess
    Mind Chess
    Ebook163 pages1 hour

    Mind Chess

    By Nicole Elizabeth Orozco

    ()

    Read preview

    About this ebook

    Mind Chess: Escaping the Game of the Covert Narcissist reveals the subtle manipulation tactics of quiet narcissists who wound with a whisper instead of a shout. Unlike their overtly narcissistic counterparts, covert narcissists present themselves as humble, spiritual, or sacrificing while systematically eroding their targets' confidence and reality.

    This guide is your key to understanding how covert narcissists use false humility, passive-aggressive control, and spiritual bypassing to create trauma bonds with empaths and highly sensitive people. Through real stories and practical insights, you'll learn to recognize the subtle signs of manipulation, such as love bombing whispers and gaslighting techniques. Armed with this knowledge, you'll be prepared to navigate the insidious ways these stealth manipulators turn friends and colleagues into unwitting players in their game.

    Empower yourself with the knowledge to recognize early warning signs, break free from emotional manipulation, and heal from narcissistic abuse. This book, written from both personal experience and professional understanding, guides you through the process. Whether you're dealing with a covert narcissist in business partnerships, romantic relationships, friendships, or family dynamics, you'll find tools for setting boundaries and reclaiming your power.

    Designed for people-pleasers, empaths, and anyone questioning their reality in relationships that look perfect on the surface but feel devastating underneath, this comprehensive guide offers hope and practical steps. It covers the journey from recognition through recovery, providing a roadmap for not just surviving covert narcissistic abuse but thriving beyond it.

    Transform your understanding of quiet abuse and learn to trust your intuition again. Break free from trauma bonds and rediscover your authentic self. This isn't just about escaping the game - it's about reclaiming your power and creating boundaries that protect your spirit while keeping your heart open.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherNicole Elizabeth Orozco
    Release dateDec 22, 2024
    ISBN9798230174875
    Mind Chess

    Related to Mind Chess

    Related ebooks

    Psychology For You

    View More
    View More

    Related podcast episodes

    Related articles

    • Article

      Clearly, God Loves Me: The Millions Interviews Nada Alic

      Sep 21, 2022

      "The whole point of art is to ask, 'Are you seeing what I’m seeing?'" The post Clearly, God Loves Me: The Millions Interviews Nada Alic appeared first on The Millions.

      8 min read

    • Article

      Hooked On A FEELING

      Feb 16, 2021

      Hooked On A FEELING
      4 min read

    • Article

      Humane Nature

      Jul 20, 2021

      Humane Nature
      16 min read

    • Article

      Starting Over Is What’s Hard: The Millions Interviews Mary Laura Philpott

      May 15, 2019

      It’s frighteningly easy to settle into being someone you don’t want to be, because that settling can happen so gradually. The post Starting Over Is What’s Hard: The Millions Interviews Mary Laura Philpott appeared first on The Millions.

      7 min read

    • Article

      I Want To Be On Better Terms With My Badly Behaved Gran

      Feb 25, 2022

      I wish I could have a better relationship with my grandmother. She has been recognised as a difficult person, a liar and highly critical for as long as I remember. She pits family members against each other, picks fights, says what she wants. If we a

      2 min read

    • Article

      Q&A

      Sep 27, 2022

      MARY FENWICK is a writer, speaker and executive coach. She is also a mother, divorcee and widow. GOT A QUESTION FOR MARY? Email [email protected], with ‘Mary life’ in the subject line. FOR MORE about Mary’s work in leadership and team co

      3 min read

    • Article

      The Creative Hero’s Journey: 5 Reasons You Should Write Your Book, Paint Your Picture, Sing Your Song

      Dec 9, 2021

      Estimated reading time: 10 minutes — I used to be a professional disease hunter, a board-certified surgical pathologist. I was the M.D. in a white coat who stared at your skin (or breast, brain or bone, etc.) biopsy under the microscope and let your

      6 min read

    • Article

      Turning Black Queer Rage Into Black Queer Joy

      Oct 1, 2021

      I have never been comfortable setting a place at the table for my anger. I always invited passion and excitement in and tolerated anxiety at the time, believing it was a by-product of my two favourite guests. But where was contentment, calm and joy?

      2 min read

    • Article

      This Man Says the Mind Has No Depths

      Jul 26, 2018

      A whole lot of books on the brain are published these days and you can read yourself into a coma trying to make sense of their various messages. So it was with my usual low-burn curiosity that I starting reading The Mind Is Flat by British behavioral

      12 min read

    • Article

      Rewriting the Story of Your Life

      Apr 8, 2024

      I once heard John Irving describe how he came up with his novels this way: “I think of a character I love and then imagine the worst thing that could happen to them.” This is a pretty good description of any story, which is always going to be driven

      5 min read

    • Article

      Why Empathy Can Be So Hard

      May 1, 2023

      I RECENTLY SPOKE at a conference for CEOs in North Carolina, and after I gave my presentation, an enthusiastic gentleman came over to speak with me. He told me how great my presentation was and how he worked with “coloured people” back home and how i

      7 min read

    • Article

      Praise Be

      Jan 31, 2021

      Praise Be
      2 min read

    • Article

      Making Each Day Matter

      Nov 18, 2016

      Making Each Day Matter
      6 min read

    • Article

      Face Time With Terry McMillan

      Mar 27, 2020

      Face Time With Terry McMillan
      5 min read

    • Article

      Alyssa Cole

      Apr 8, 2024

      Alyssa Cole
      12 min read

    • Article

      Your Own Worst Enemy

      May 8, 2019

      Your Own Worst Enemy
      7 min read

    • Article

      Amy Tan's Lonely, ‘Pixel-by-Pixel’ Writing Method

      Dec 10, 2013

      Walt Whitman’s “Song of Myself” helps remind the Joy Luck Club author to capture the “microscopic” details that make her characters unique.

      8 min read

    • Article

      Conflicting Narratives: The Millions Interviews Courtney Denelle

      Aug 31, 2022

      "Writing this novel was very much cutting along the nerve." The post Conflicting Narratives: The Millions Interviews Courtney Denelle appeared first on The Millions.

      5 min read

    • Article

      THE WD INTERVIEW Dani Shapiro

      Oct 30, 2019

      THE WD INTERVIEW Dani Shapiro
      11 min read

    • Article

      Letting Go

      Feb 15, 2023

      THEY tell you to write the book you’re afraid to write. But let’s be honest: It’s scary to write any book. There’s the fear you won’t be able to write it. The fear you’ll write it and won’t be able to sell it. The fear you’ll sell it and it will flop

      10 min read

    • Article

      Letting Go

      Feb 15, 2023

      THEY tell you to write the book you’re afraid to write. But let’s be honest: It’s scary to write any book. There’s the fear you won’t be able to write it. The fear you’ll write it and won’t be able to sell it. The fear you’ll sell it and it will flop

      10 min read

    • Article

      Narcissistic, Moi?

      Mar 6, 2024

      Narcissistic, Moi?
      3 min read

    • Article

      Words Are A Way Through

      Jun 2, 2022

      Words Are A Way Through
      6 min read

    Related categories

    Reviews for Mind Chess

    0 ratings

    0 ratings0 reviews

    What did you think?

    Tap to rate

    Review must be at least 10 words

      Book preview

      Mind Chess - Nicole Elizabeth Orozco

      Dedication

      To those who light my world:

      My beloved family - Chuck, Cheyne, Kristen, Ryan, Caitlin, Shelbi, Jake, Jasmine, Mila, Madden, Keegan, Kehlani, and Mo (Audrey). You are my heart walking in many bodies, my joy multiplied, my reason for growing stronger.

      To my mother, Patricia Staniskis - your absence is a presence, your lessons echo in my choices, your love continues to guide me. I miss you more than words can say, and I couldn't have navigated this life without the foundation you built.

      To those who have crossed the veil before us - family and friends whose fingerprints remain on my heart - you are not gone, just ahead on the path.

      And to all who have walked this journey with me - you know who you are - thank you for being lights in both darkness and dawn.

      Author's Note

      There are some books that we write because we want to. This is one I wrote because I needed to. After decades of studying human behavior and psychology, I still fell into covert, narcissistic relationships, both personal and professional. This was despite years of work in various roles.

      This isn't another book about narcissism. This is about the quiet ones, the spiritual ones, the ones who wound you with a whisper instead of a shout. They leave you questioning your sanity, all the while showing a façade of concern.

      If you're reading this, chances are you've experienced it too. Maybe you're still in it. You want to know why something so perfect on the surface feels so wrong underneath. Maybe you've broken free and are trying to make sense of what happened. Or maybe you're starting to see patterns in your relationships that finally have a name.

      I have scribed this from both personal experience and professional understanding. It's written with the rawness of someone who has been there and the insight of someone who has studied why. Most importantly, it aims to help end covert narcissistic abuse. This is not by becoming harder, but by becoming wiser.

      This book comes from both wounds and wisdom. It is a product of hard lessons learned. Our struggles can help others. My hope is to help others by sharing these insights. I want them to: 1. Recognize patterns I missed. 2. Trust instincts I doubted. 3. Find strength they didn't know they had.

      What you'll find in these pages isn't theory. It's real life. It's messy. It's complicated. And it's hopeful. Understanding covert narcissism isn't about spotting abuse. It's about reclaiming your power, your voice, and your right to be yourself.

      Let's begin this journey together.

      NICOLE ELIZABETH OROZCO

      Introduction: Escaping the Game of Control

      Let's talk about something possibly affecting your life right now, even if you don't realize it. Do you know that feeling in your gut when something's just off? When you're giving and giving, trying so hard to keep the peace, just trying to do the right thing, but somehow you end up feeling drained, confused, and maybe even a little crazy? Yeah, that feeling. We need to talk about that.

      I've been there – oh boy, have I been there. As an empath (and if you're reading this book, chances are you might be one, too), I've been like a magnet for narcissists my entire life. The obvious ones, sure – those loud, look-at-me types who need to be the center of everything. But the sneaky ones? The quiet ones who seem so sweet, giving, and concerned about everyone else? They're the ones who really got me. And that's why I had to write this book.

      Here's the thing: narcissism doesn't wear a name tag. It doesn't introduce itself at parties saying, Hi, I'm here to slowly drain your soul while making you think it's all your fault! No, it shows up as your super-helpful coworker who always makes you feel like you're not doing enough. It's that friend who's always there for you until you're completely exhausted from maintaining the friendship. It's that partner who seems so sensitive and caring but leaves you wondering why you're always walking on eggshells.

      Let me tell you a story. I used to have this friend – let's call her Sarah. Everyone loved Sarah. She was always organizing fun get-togethers, remembering everyone's birthdays, and being there for every crisis. She seemed like the perfect friend. But after every interaction, I felt... depleted. Sometimes, I couldn't even explain why. She was so nice! How could I possibly complain about someone so giving? It took me years to understand that her giving came with invisible strings, and those strings were slowly turning into chains.

      This book is crucial because right now, someone reading this is nodding their head, feeling that knot in their stomach, thinking, Oh my God, this is my life. It could be your boss, your mom, your spouse. These are the people who seem caring and supportive but leave you feeling inadequate and drained. If this resonates with you, this book is for you.

      It's important for you to know that you're not alone in this. You're not crazy, you're not too sensitive. There are others who have experienced what you're going through, and we're here to support you.

      We all have some narcissistic traits – that's normal. Sometimes, we all get self-centered, need attention, or fail to see others' perspectives. But there's a world of difference between having some traits and being a covert narcissist who systematically breaks down others' sense of self. It's like the difference between occasionally overeating cake and having a severe eating disorder. One is normal human behavior; the other is a pattern that destroys lives.

      As empaths, we're especially vulnerable. We're the peacekeepers, the ones who want everyone to be happy and who'll twist ourselves into pretzels trying to maintain harmony. We hate conflict so much that we'll ignore red flags the size of Texas to keep the peace. We're smart, capable people in so many areas of our lives, but when it comes to dealing with covert narcissists, our greatest strengths – empathy, compassion, and the desire to help – become the very things that can be used against us.

      I've been that churchgoing good person who thought serving others meant letting myself be used up. I've been that employee working nights and weekends because my boss was counting on me and knew I was the only one who could handle it. I've been that friend who kept giving and giving because that's what good friends do.

      Let me be clear: there's nothing wrong with being giving, kind, or hardworking. The problem comes when these beautiful qualities are exploited by people who know exactly how to use them for their benefit while keeping their mask of humble servitude.

      Do you know what opened my eyes? When I started talking about this with other people. Once I began sharing my experiences, the stories just poured out. It was like opening a floodgate. Sharing our experiences is not just cathartic, it's a powerful tool for understanding and healing.

      Take my friend Jessica's story. She had this business partner who initially seemed like a dream come true. He was so humble, she told me. Always giving credit to others, always talking about how blessed he was to work with such talented people. But slowly, things started shifting. Important meetings would get scheduled when she couldn't make them. Decisions would be made without her input, but if she brought it up, he'd say things like, Oh, I thought we discussed that... you seemed so overwhelmed, I didn't want to burden you further. After two years, she found herself pushed out of major decisions in her own company while he kept his reputation as the most considerate, thoughtful business partner anyone could ask for.

      Or listen to Mark's experience with his covert narcissist wife: Everyone thought I had the perfect marriage. Kylee always posted on social media about how grateful she was for me and how blessed she felt. But behind closed doors? She'd spiral into a crisis if I didn't respond to her texts immediately. If I spent time with my friends, she'd get 'mysteriously' ill. She never directly yelled or demanded anything – she was too 'spiritual.' Instead, she'd talk about how sensitive she was, how deeply she felt things, and how her need for connection differed from other people's. I ended up isolated from everyone I loved, walking on eggshells in my own home and still feeling like I was the problem.

      Then there's Maria's story about her mother: My mom was the church volunteer queen. Everyone called her an angel. She spent her life 'serving others,' but at home? Every good deed came with a price tag of guilt. 'Oh, I'm so tired from helping Sister Johnson today, but don't worry about me...' or 'I gave up my dreams to raise you children, but that's what a good mother does...' It took me years of therapy to understand that true giving doesn't come with a side of manipulation.

      These stories might sound familiar to you. It could be too familiar. You may be sitting there thinking about your situation, wondering if that person in your life who seems so perfect on the surface might be slowly draining your soul.

      Let me tell you something important: Recognizing

      Enjoying the preview?
      Page 1 of 1