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    My Book Of Poems
    My Book Of Poems
    My Book Of Poems
    Ebook108 pages48 minutes

    My Book Of Poems

    By Bernard Morris

    ()

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    About this ebook

    A collection of humorous and serious poems on subjects including love, politics, covid, music and the environment.
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherBernard Morris
    Release dateJul 14, 2021
    ISBN9791220825542
    My Book Of Poems

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      Book preview

      My Book Of Poems - Bernard Morris

      MY BOOK OF POEMS

      Bernard Morris

      © 2021 Bernard Morris

      First Edition

      The author asserts the moral right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this work. All Rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrievable system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means without the prior written consent of the author, nor be otherwise circulated in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.

      Cover by Sponchia/Pixabay

      CONTENTS

      Old Friends

      Rainy Day Talent Contests

      The Customer

      If We Don't Sort The Problems Out

      Donald Trump The President Was Anything But Brave

      Kelp!

      Isolation Row

      Your Hair And Teeth Are Falling Out

      Those Four Words

      I Want To Feel Your Loving Heart

      Don't Think Twice It's Alright To Sell Your Entire Catalogue Of Songs

      Now I'm Nearly Four

      Every Time I See Your Smile

      We're Homo Sapiens

      Uncle Charlie The Funny Clown

      He Looks Like A Woman, You See

      Silverback Fighter

      Hogging The Ball

      Your Nose Is Red And Swollen

      All You Need Is Gloves

      Breastfeeding In Public

      All The Junk Food

      Quarantine Delight

      At The Doctors

      Covid Deaths Are Mounting

      Bad Pie

      Antibody

      Twerking Ass Hero

      There Was A Time

      How Can Anybody Ever Eat A Cow

      When You Forget To Buy A Present

      Remembering Thatcher

      I Am In Bed

      Old Age

      Corona Corona

      Fried Fish Is Nice

      As You Get Older

      A Virus Called Covid

      That Yolk Isn't Runny Anymore

      Librariantics

      If I Had Never Met You

      Oops! I Farted Again

      Not For Me To Sing

      MuckDonalds

      Donald The President

      Big Toe

      All Night Pong

      Mr Tangerine Man

      Don't

      Knockin' On Bevan's Door

      Can't Get It Out Of My Shed

      We Remember Milligan

      Colourful Chameleon

      I Wanna Wash My Hands

      Swearing

      Starfish

      He Is Beep Beep

      I Am Enormous

      I'm In Love With Your Behind

      Old Lady Walking To The Shop

      Referendum 2

      You're A Truly Devoted Real Ale Lover

      The Capitol Front And Back Door

      You Know I Can't Sweat

      There's A New Single Out

      Virus

      A Mansion

      I Can't Pooh

      I’ve Always Been Health Conscious

      OLD FRIENDS

      Remember when we were kids

      Full of the joys of spring

      Always having a laugh

      And not being afraid to sing

      The simple things we used to do

      Like climbing over walls

      Playing hide and seek in the street

      And playing kerby with footballs

      None of this computer rubbish

      The kids all play these days

      We got our pleasure from simple things

      Like getting lost in a maze

      It didn’t take much to keep us happy

      We came home from school and got changed

      If you told today’s kids what we did for fun

      They’d look at you as if you were deranged

      We had our tea, played out on the front

      Till our Mums shouted us in

      Some of us played out all day on the field

      And our Mums got drunk on gin

      We always looked forward to Thursdays

      For Thursday was Market Day

      We’d jump on to Mr Mather’s cart

      And he’d take us all the way

      He’d take us all down to the market

      But that horse didn’t half pong

      We’d stop and pick Molly Rankin up on the way

      And we’d all have a sing-a-long

      And Billy Baker and Elsie Parker

      You could get half the village on that cart

      And there’d be an enormous roar of laughter

      Every time Eddie Rogers did a fart

      Those were the days and it was always sunny

      Whether skipping or climbing trees

      Please open your eyes, don’t leave me yet

      It’s not time, don’t leave me...please

      RAINY DAY TALENT CONTESTS

      Well, they’ll know you when you’re judging

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