Date Him or Dump Him?
5/5
()
About this ebook
Answer the questions and follow the pages to find out:
• How much do you two have to talk about?
• Not much. Turn to page 115.
• Anything and everything. Turn to page 22.
• We don’t really talk at all; we’re too busy making out. Turn to page 25.
With simple, straightforward advice, Date Him or Dump Him? will tell it like it is!
Read more from Melissa Heckscher
Be Safe!: Simple Strategies for Death-Free Living Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5The Pregnancy Test: 150 Important, Embarrassing, and Slightly Neurotic Questions Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
Related to Date Him or Dump Him?
Related ebooks
Get to Know Your Mate: A Personality Extraction Exercise Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsDating Secrets Most Women Would Never Know Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe 24 Types of Suckas to Avoid Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Sex & Relationship Advice for the Complete Idiot Rating: 1 out of 5 stars1/5What to Say to Men on a Date Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsHow to Break-Up With Someone Without Breaking Their Heart Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Relationship Saver / The Gameless Relationship: A Fast Track Manual for Saving and Repairing Your Relationship Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsHow To Get Over a Breakup For Women Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5How To Get Your Ex Back Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/58 Weeks to Everlasting: A Step-By-Step Guide to Getting (and Keeping!) the Guy You Want Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Love Astrology: Leo: Use the stars to find your perfect match! Rating: 1 out of 5 stars1/5A Woman's Guide to Get Mr. Right Without Being a Doormat Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsSure Ways To End A Toxic Relationship Fast Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsStuff Every Woman Should Know Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsHow to Behave: Dating and Sex: A Guide to Modern Manners for the Socially Challenged Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Is He the One?: 101 Questions That Will Lead You to the Truth, Whatever That Is Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Ladies' Room Reader Quiz Book: 1,000 Questions and Answers about Women and the Things They Love Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsOMG! Guys: How to Survive 101 of the Most F'ed Dating Situations Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsUnbox Your Relationships: How to Attract the Right People and Build Relationships that Last Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Last Relationship Book You Will Ever Need Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsHow to Tell if Your Boyfriend Is the Antichrist: (and if he is, should you break up with him?) Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Simple Acts of Love: 500 Little Ways to Make a Big Difference in Your Relationship Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Love List: A Guide to Getting Who You Want Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsFalling Back in Love: 7 Steps to Saving Your Relationship Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings50 Ways to Read Your Lover: Secret Strategies That Reveal the Real Him Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5I Can't Keep Dating Like This Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsLove That Works: 38 Awesome Hacks for Amazing Relationships Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsLong Distance Love: The Blueprint to Starting a Long Distance Relationship that is Fun and Successful Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsSay It Now: 33 Creative Ways To Say I LOVE YOU To the Most Important People In Your Life Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
Humor & Satire For You
Anxious People: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Thirty Thousand Bottles of Wine and a Pig Called Helga: A not-so-perfect tree change Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Everything Is F*cked: A Book About Hope Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5What If?: Serious Scientific Answers to Absurd Hypothetical Questions Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5The Mother Tongue: English and How it Got that Way Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Corrections Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: the heartfelt, funny memoir by a New York Times bestselling therapist Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Everything I Know About Love: A Memoir Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Winners: From the New York Times bestselling author of TikTok phenomenon Anxious People Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The 100-Year-Old Man Who Climbed Out the Window and Disappeared: by Jonas Jonasson | Conversation Starters Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Bad Feminist: Essays Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5I Will Judge You by Your Bookshelf Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5How to Be Alone: If You Want To, and Even If You Don't Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5And Every Morning the Way Home Gets Longer and Longer: A Novella Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Quit Like a Woman: The Radical Choice to Not Drink in a Culture Obsessed with Alcohol Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Don't Panic: Douglas Adams & The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Notes from a Small Island Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Dutch House: Nominated for the Women's Prize 2020 Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Best Joke Book (Period): Hundreds of the Funniest, Silliest, Most Ridiculous Jokes Ever Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Boys: A Memoir of Hollywood and Family Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Mindful As F*ck: 100 Simple Exercises to Let That Sh*t Go! Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5No One Is Talking About This: Shortlisted for the Booker Prize 2021 and the Women’s Prize for Fiction 2021 Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Dirty German: Everyday Slang from "What's Up?" to "F*%# Off!" Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsNothing to See Here: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Dirty French: Everyday Slang from "What's Up?" to "F*%# Off!" Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
Related categories
Reviews for Date Him or Dump Him?
1 rating0 reviews
Book preview
Date Him or Dump Him? - Melissa Heckscher
Copyright © 2005 by Quirk Productions, Inc.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form without written permission from the publisher.
Library of Congress Cataloging in Publication Number: 2004114531
ISBN 978-1-59474-038-1
Ebook ISBN 978-1-68369-000-9
Ebook design adapted from printed book design by Andrea Stephany
Illustrated by Austin Saylor www.sprdlx.com
Edited by Erin Slonaker
Quirk Books
215 Church Street
Philadelphia, PA 19106
quirkbooks.com
v4.1
Contents
Cover
Copyright
Title Page
Foreword
Introduction
How to Use this Book
Date Him or Dump Him?
About the Author
Foreword
Romance doesn’t have to be complicated.
But, strangely, it oftentimes gets that way. As a psychiatrist working in New York City’s trendy SoHo neighborhood, I see it way too much: He likes me, but…
He’s married, but…
He doesn’t treat me well, but…
In Manhattan, sometimes even not dating gets complicated. The comments I hear are usually along the lines of, It’s so hard to meet someone
or Everyone always seems so busy.
Really, though, it’s simple: You meet someone; you decide if you like him. (Note: The question should always be Do I like him,
not Does he like me?
) But it doesn’t usually work that way. Women cling to the wrong guys all the time; men brush off the right girls all the time. Dating has become a game with no concrete set of rules. But there are a set of user-friendly principles that can be applied to dating and relationships. They are as follows:
Don’t be afraid of change. Life can be quite difficult at times, and often we are forced to either adapt and change or stay trapped. Have you ever noticed how many people choose to stay trapped? Make a conscious choice to end this cycle.
Take it slow. Whatever happened to foreplay? To meeting someone and having an extraordinary conversation, hoping that it would last? To becoming giddy with anticipation? Most people, in my opinion, move way too fast. A date becomes a relationship before its time, before individuals have time to be themselves and let others see them for who they truly are. Dating should be a long, hopefully pleasurable, interview for the job of partner,
and it takes a lot of questions and answers to fully understand what the job entails. Take the time to find out everything before settling on anyone. Ask a lot of questions. Be candid. There’s no need to rush to the comfortable
stages of a relationship. Enjoy the beginning; it can be exhilarating.
Have fun. If you’re in a relationship and you’re not having fun together, you probably should not be a couple.
Don’t pretend. A common mistake many women make is acting how they think a man wants them to act. Bad move. All that pretending eventually becomes tiring, and then the real person comes out. If you want someone to like you, he has to like you, not the person you’re pretending to be. I say if you want to act, do it on stage. If you try to present yourself as perfect and always agreeable, you’re just creating a fantasy.
Don’t be afraid to disagree. Roadblocks along the way are common. Watch out for comments such as, We never argue.
You should argue sometimes, at least a little bit. Recognize that roadblocks are useful; they provide a time out
during which we can collect our thoughts and refuel. Try to work through these obstacles and understand the significance of the event itself. While every event doesn’t have to be a disaster, it shouldn’t be ignored either. What defines a healthy relationship is how the two of you work through your inherent differences.
Work on yourself. Relationships require work. A loving relationship can be fulfilling, but if it becomes all-consuming it can be toxic. Don’t be defined by your relationship. Retain your individuality, continue to work on your goals, and make time for yourself outside the relationship. This allows a healthy perspective to flourish, and it makes for more interesting conversation. The best thing about relationships is that they give us the opportunity to learn about ourselves. They help us grow, mature, and evolve into more interesting individuals. When one person stops contributing, things can get really dull.
Finally, one last word of advice: Don’t take it all so seriously. Things change. Let your life be a journey. Welcome new experiences, and try not to have expectations. Don’t be defined by old-fashioned ideals: People can have more than one true love.
Keep all of this in mind as you assess the status of your current relationship in the following pages. Remember: All relationships are different—we are the ones that change, hopefully for the better. The full package—love, lust, trust, companionship, responsibility—is attainable, and it does exist.
Anthony Termine, M.D.
New York, New York
Introduction
Date Him or Dump Him? is the product of a breakup. Or, to be fair, a series of breakups.
The latest guy’s story? He hadn’t gotten over his ex-girlfriend. The guy before him was too young. The one before that, too weird. Somewhere along the