Cases of Problematic Communication from College Students
By Xin-An Lu
()
About this ebook
However, in reality, numerous social problems are not because of a lack of knowledge, but because of a lack of action or a lack of practice of the knowledge. In an effort to shift attention from knowing communication to doing communication, Cases of Problematic Communication confronts its readers with realistic cases of problematic communication and offers questions to facilitate your reflection and communicational action. Promising to transform the students' learning from one of passive cognition to one of reflective action, this booklet can also serve as a resource for commercial textbooks for oral communication.
Xin-An Lu
Xin-An Lu, Ph.D., teaches Basic Oral Communication, Small Group Communication, Public Speaking, Organizational Communication, and Computer-Mediated Communication at Shippensburg University of Pennsylvania. He lives with his wife and two daughters in Shippensburg, Pennsylvania.
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Cases of Problematic Communication from College Students - Xin-An Lu
Contents
Preface
1
Interpersonal Communication
2
Perception and Intrapersonal Communication
3
Listening and the Communication Process
4
Verbal Communication
5
Nonverbal Communication
6
Intercultural Communication
7
Leadership and Small Group Communication
8
Public Speaking
Introduction of Some Contributors
Preface
There is a mistaken assumption in many social sciences that knowledge will automatically translate into action. Based on this assumption, textbooks for basic oral communication, a required course in many college campuses, attempt to ameliorate students’ communicational behaviors by teaching them knowledge about communication: theories, concepts, and terms. Not only failing their attempt, these textbooks also estrange students by belaboring what is common sense
in students’ perception.
However, in reality, numerous social problems are not because of a lack of knowledge, but because of a lack of action or a lack of practice of the knowledge. In an effort to shift attention from knowing communication to doing communication, Cases of Problematic Communication confronts its readers with realistic cases of problematic communication and offers questions to facilitate your reflection and communicational action. Promising to transform the students’ learning from one of passive cognition to one of reflective action, this booklet can also serve as a resource for commercial textbooks for oral communication.
This booklet is the result of an experiment in my classroom teaching. All contributors to this work are young college students in my Fall classes, 2003, at Shippensburg University of Pennsylvania. They present what they have learned in my Basic Oral Communication class in the form of a published and distributed book. The purpose of this educational experiment is to explore methods that can manifest student learning not only in a more permanent format, but also in a format that gives the learners a sense of pride. It is my hope that result from this experiment helps not only the readers of this booklet, but also our search for more effective learning in college education.
Contributors to this work are (last names in alphabetical order): Corey Alexander, Natasha Alligood, Nicolas Anspach, Ashley Beaver, Jamie Booth, Naomi Creason, James Dibble, Bradley Dittmer, Melissa Ford, Hillary Fraker, Tara Fremont, Amarilis Garcia, Ashley Gross, Tracey Halstead, Ashlee Johnson, Margaret Kirkpatrick, Jessica Kreger, Katelyn Kuhn, James Laughlin, Stephanie Lawton, Brandon Miller, Elizabeth Perovich, Martin Rodriguez, Meghan Rogers, Jacob Rosenberry, Patrick Shandera, Susan Shimer, Michael Streett, Kristin Strickland, Cella Sum, Taralyn Tetreault, Nicole Thierwechter, Katie Titus, Lam Truong, Christopher Voss, Brett Witmer, Alexander Wynne, Kenneth Yeager, Lindsay Zolna.
1
Interpersonal Communication
Case 1.1 Yeah, Uh-Huh, O.K.
Julia was invited to an invitation only party, which she had been hoping to attend since the beginning of the year; however, when she looked at the invitation, the date conflicted with her grandmother’s birthday. She knew that her mother would expect her to celebrate her grandmother’s birthday with the rest of the family, since it has been tradition to reunite for Grandma’s birthday. In order to gain permission to go to her friend’s party and miss her grandma’s birthday party, Julia decided to ask for her mother’s permission right before her mother fell asleep, determining her mother would be less likely to be paying attention to the conversation. As her mother was falling asleep, Julia asked her for permission, receiving a Yeah, uh-huh. O.K.
for an answer.
On that Saturday, Julia dressed to go to her friend’s party, but her mother stopped her and told her they were going to the birthday party. Julia attempted to defend her situation by telling her mom that she had already given her permission to miss it. Julia’s mother denied it, claiming she did not remember the conversation.
Questions for reflections:
1. How did Julia’s plan backfire?
2. What lesson can be learned about the importance of explicit clarity
in some communication scenarios?
3. What would you do to assure explicit clarity
required in many communication situations?
4. How could have the communication in the case been improved?
Case 1.2 Loss of a Friend
During high school, Carrie had a group of close girl-friends that she had grown up with. In the spring of her junior year, Carrie’s father passed away unexpectedly. Despite the fact that she was not particularly close with her father, the loss hit Carrie hard nonetheless. Her friends attended her father’s viewing and funeral and made sure that Carrie knew they were there for her in whatever way necessary. Her friends expected to see a change in Carrie’s personality as she dealt with her grief, but they were extremely—not to mention unpleasantly—surprised to discover that the Carrie they had always known was gone. In her place was a cold, remote girl who brushed them off when they attempted to talk to her, ignored them when passing them in the hallways, and wholly shut her best friends out of her life. On the few occasions when her friends were able to engage her in conversation, Carrie wore a blank expression, replied to questions with as few words as possible, volunteered little information about herself, and never inquired as to how her friends were. Her friends left for summer break hoping she’d be more like her old self for their senior year.
When they found at the beginning of the school year that she was unchanged, they sat down to discuss their concerns with her. Initially defensive, Carrie finally seemed receptive to their comments, and vowed to work on improving her attitude towards others. For a few weeks, the difference was very noticeable, but gradually Carrie began slipping back towards her self-imposed isolation. By November of their senior year, Carrie’s friends had virtually given up on helping Carrie and instead had begun avoiding her because of the pain she verbally inflicted on them when they attempted to involve her. Meanwhile, Carrie turned to partying and alcohol as a solution to her pain, and is seemingly wandering down the wrong path as she enters college.
Questions for reflections:
1. In your opinion, is Carrie’s personality change reasonable as a reaction to her father’s death?
2. Did Carrie’s friends respond appropriately to the situation? Was there more they could have done to help Carrie?
3. Are there any measures Carrie could have taken to help herself and therefore avoid pushing away her friends? If so, what are a few of these measures?
4. Are there different methods Carrie’s friends could have used in the aftermath of Carrie’s father’s death? If so, what are some of these methods?
Case 1.3 Changes in a Romantic Relationship
Scott and Ali have been dating for three months when Ali leaves for college an hour from their hometown. She has noticed that, recently, Scott has been evasive and distant. He often neglects to return phone calls, and seems to be avoiding spending time with her. However, when they are together, he acts no differently from what he did before. This upsets her, because she realizes that once she moves to college, she will not be able to spend as much time with Scott as they are accustomed to during the summer months. The night before Ali is scheduled to move into her dorm, she goes out to dinner with Scott and her family. Everything is perfectly normal, and though sad to be leaving home, Ali is confident that her relationship that she has left at home will survive this transition. Scott has begun to be more attentive, and yet occasionally quieter than usual. Ali, however, is unconcerned, simply attributing the change in his mood to stress over his impending senior year of high school and college applications.
In phone conversations during her first few days at college, Scott responds to Ali normally and seems to have gotten over whatever has been bothering him. However, a week after moving to college, Ali receives a phone call from Scott. He sounds extremely upset and confused, and informs her that he doesn’t believe he can continue a long-distance relationship with her, despite the fact that Ali will be returning home on weekends. Ali is taken completely off-guard and is left virtually speechless. Nonplussed as to how to respond to Scott, she tells him that she will discuss the subject with him in a few days, once she has gotten home and is able to talk to him in person. Unfortunately, Ali still has three days of classes to work through before she is able to return home. Due to Scott’s announcement, she has difficulty concentrating on her work.
Questions for reflections:
1. Do you have any idea why Scott’s opinion of the relationship may have suddenly changed?
2. In your view, could this have been avoided through the sharing of each person’s thoughts and feelings on the change?
3. Was Ali correct in deciding to discuss the issue in person instead of over the phone?
Case 1.4 Family Responsibilities
Kayla and her roommate Andrea are freshmen at a local university. One Friday, they decide to return home and Tyler, who is Kayla’s boyfriend and a high school senior, volunteers to pick them up, as his high school has only a half-day of classes that day. However, Tyler’s younger brother Grant is expected to stay after the early dismissal to assist with a project. Grant has known about this expectation for weeks, yet still does not tell Tyler that he will need a ride home that afternoon until the Thursday before the event. Tyler’s parents naturally expect that Tyler will bring Grant home, but Tyler has already made a commitment to picking up Kayla and Andrea at college that afternoon. Instead of staying after classes are over to bring Grant home, Tyler instead travels to pick up the girls, leaving Grant to catch a ride with a friend’s mother. Tyler and Grant’s parents, upon discovering this, are extremely angry with Tyler for not fulfilling his responsibility,
as they view it, to ensure that his brother has a ride home. Grant, however, has known about this event for weeks and instead decided not to inform anyone of it.
Questions for reflections:
1. Are the boys’ parents justified to be angry with Tyler?
2. How could this situation have been remedied so that everyone’s needs were met? Is this possible or not, or are compromises necessary?
3. What could have been done to avoid the situation in the first place?
Case 1.5 Confrontation Discs
Wendy and Susan are new roommates at Shippensburg University. They have never met each other before, but found out that they shared several similarities and have gotten along very well for several weeks. One of their similarities is that in musical taste. Wendy has taken to borrowing Susan’s compact discs. Normally she asks before she borrows them, but when Susan is away, Wendy assumed it was alright to borrow from her. Susan has been frustrated by the unapproved usage of her personal things, but she has made no effort to express her feelings to Wendy. After three weeks of borrowing CDs, Wendy accidentally scratched one of them. She openly admits her mistake to Susan and offers to replace the CD. This is the final straw needed for Susan to explode at Wendy and refuse to speak to her.
Questions for reflection:
1. Based upon the