Of Water & Wine

For Sara

Acknowledgements

This book could not have been written without the help of many people; to them I wish to express my sincere thanks:

To my wife, Sara, who read and believed.

To my parents, Kathryn and Marc, for their unwavering belief in their sons.

To Max Maccari, my first publisher, and Lori McLellan, my editor, who made this a better book.

To Matt Bin, John Ferns, Wendy Morgan, Nancy Vanderzwan and all those who offered their insight, encouragement, and guidance.

To Timothy Findley and Joe Kertz at the Humber School for Writers.

To my grandparents – Albra Outhet, Wilfred Bell, Jean Smith and Roy MacDonald – who believed the past was valuable enough to be remembered.

And to DLG.

R.B.

CHAPTER 1

It was the summer of 1916, that precarious year. It was a year of things gone wrong, the unflinching hand of misfortune touching each family in its own way. Throughout the world, the old empires had begun to wince at the butchery in which their vanity had trapped them. But instead of curbing disaster they swam farther into the current, drawing millions after them. Such are the drowning, whose grip is stronger than the whole world.

That summer the trains winding through the forests of Ontario’s north carried one of two things: soldiers or tourists. The former headed east toward Europe, while the latter went in the opposite direction just as fast as they could.

Heading into the hills and trees beyond Haliburton, soldiers hung out windows to watch the trains of tourists that passed them. Blinking into the sun each man was enveloped by the ownerless trace of perfume, the jealous echo of chastity and sane existence among all the smoke and clatter. Fragments of a world disappearing.

Sitting back in her seat, Albra Creighton watched as her brother Paul played with his Sunday collar. Hannah, their mother, had insisted they travel in their best clothes, and an hour after leaving Union Station all five of her children were reduced to distraction and misery. For Albra, this was only compounded by the humiliation of being dressed in blue to match her brother. Though they barely touched on the seat they shared, she felt it – his claim on her, not as her brother, but as a twin. The burden of that word. An umbilical millstone.

Across the aisle, the oldest child, Edward, sat rocking to the sway of the train. At seventeen Eddie stood as tall as his father, still hanging in that awkward tension between youth and manhood. Squeezed beside him were his sisters Elizabeth and Laura, both trying to relieve their boredom by reading a magazine together. In their mid-teens, they were still good companions though the two could not have been more dissimilar in person. The older of the two, Elizabeth, had inherited her father’s quiet and brooding demeanour. However, like her sister, Elizabeth was good-natured and even playful, though she lacked Laura’s confidence and early sense of sexuality. Two elements that had already pointed Laura out to the older women as a Beauty.

Hannah had last heard that term in her own youth, and it brought now a sense of assurance that she lacked in adult life. When her doubts became too much she would watch Laura, noting the unchecked energy of her daughter’s eyes until her own were glazed with something close to envy.

The train cleaved through a town, dirty children waving as they passed. Farms and roads slipped by outside their window.

So hot, Paul complained.

There, there, Hannah scolded. There, there.

Within a few hours of leaving Union Station most of the family was asleep. Beside Albra her brother slept with his head resting on their mother’s breast. Like neglected dolls her sisters sat propped against one another, awash in a slumber of pink organdie. Across the aisle their father dozed, his hand resting on a dog-eared copy of Homer. Calvin Creighton made a habit of reading the book to his family, passing on in his own way the notions closest to him.

Sighing quietly, Albra resigned herself to looking out the window. They travelled for hours now through endless forest, the train carving its way through hills of virgin rock. Interspersed between lakes the oily smudge of lumber camps passed before their window. Shirtless men stood watching the train. Behind them a blue haze of smoke hovered above the trees.

Then, as the train wound into the hills, Albra caught sight of a narrow strip of beach freckled with boats. Behind it all stood a three-storeyed building painted white against the horizon of pine and fir.

Wake up, she whispered. We’re there.

For those with financial mobility, the Highland Inn was a bastion of civilized comforts amid the fierce beauty of the North. Flanked by stands of`` fir on a rise of ancient granite, the Inn was a sanctuary of tennis courts, a dance hall and grand piano, French wines and hot baths. Strolling through the Highland’s lobby, one was as likely to overhear tips for choosing stocks as those for lures. Third- and fourth-generation Canadians, most guests here pursued interests inherited from their grandfathers.

Yet if these were the Dominion’s moneyed elite, the guests of the Highland also shared an interest in that vast glimpse of wilderness which is their country. Still beyond the reach of prohibitionists, here on the hotel verandah one could sip scotch and look out over the border of civilization.

After seeing to their bags, Calvin followed the concierge up the broad pine staircase to their rooms. Still agitated from the trip, Hannah padded about, hanging clothes while Calvin sat by the window with a cigar.

When she was finished Hannah sat back roughly on the bed. I wish you would save that for outside.

Of course. Only we just arrived.

The linen will hold the odour.

Then I’ll leave the window open.

What, and risk a draft?

The dining room was almost full as they came down to dinner, where waiters moved with choreographed ease among the constellation of guests. The family was quite tired from the journey and mostly ate in silence. Only Eddie talked, leaning over the back of his chair to ask a boy named Jack Elliott about the fishing.

As they drank their tea Calvin seemed to rouse himself. Sitting up, he passed his hand over each cheek hesitantly.

After dinner I’ll look into acquiring a boat.

Eddie nodded. Saw some as we came in.

Calvin turned to his youngest son. Shall we have a look after dinner?

Paul frowned.

You know he hates the water, said Hannah.

Calvin smiled, glancing at the other tables. But that’s where the fish are.

Eddie examined his brother with disapproval. Besides, you’ll be in the boat.

That doesn’t matter.

Why not come down to the dock this evening? Calvin tried again. You can help me pick out a canoe.

There was an uncomfortable silence, after which Paul shook his head resolutely. Albra stared at her stubby row of fingers, like ribs against the bleached white of the table cloth.

No, of course not. Calvin paused to light a cigar, shaking out the match as he stood.

Hannah fanned at the smoke languidly. Please, Calvin...

Not to worry, and with this he turned and left.

That evening Paul went to bed early with his mother where she read his favourite story from their childhood. The significance of the book was not lost on his sister, however, who refused to follow. As a child she would listen before bed to her mother’s reading voice, sugared and indulgent, wishing Gretel to push them both in the oven.

Only much later that night did she crawl sulkily into the bed she shared with Paul. Though tired, Albra could not sleep, and for a long time she lay listening in the dark. The sound of voices slowly faded outside, and soon there came the calm murmur of wind. Much later a loon’s distant laugh rose from among the hills.

Albra was woken towards dawn. From behind the door came the hushed sound of her father’s voice, drifting into the room and under her bed like leaves. Closing her eyes she turned back to the soft drone of Paul’s breathing. Outside the lake reflected back the sun’s first rays.

That morning they sat out on the large chairs with the blueberries Elizabeth had picked with her mother. From the lake a slight breeze tugged at the quiet flowers on Hannah’s skirt, offering flight. Paul was not feeling well after breakfast so Hannah had gathered the twins about her while Elizabeth and Laura went down to the lake.

Hannah sat with her legs trapped beneath her, watching Laura in her white dress as she flirted with the lifeguard. The breeze had caught Laura’s hair, and the boy was helping to untangle it from the brooch she wore. Hannah almost smiled to see how easily she did it, at the same time remembering... Then quite suddenly she stood and began waving to Elizabeth and Laura.

Come back!

In a minute Laura was standing beside her mother, holding one shoe in each hand.

Let’s take the twins for a walk along the shore.

Shall we?

Yes, let’s.

Laura glanced down at her sister. Are you going to eat all the berries?

Looking up from the bowl, Albra ran a purple tongue of affirmation across her lips.

Hannah smiled quietly at the twins. My little couple. You look so splendid together.

Laura bent down to collect her hat. Just like Adam and Eve, she trilled.

Albra scowled to herself.

Half an hour later, with towels and bathing suits, they followed the railway along the shore. Elizabeth led the way, holding Paul’s hand as he tried to balance along the rail. Behind came Hannah, who talked quietly with Laura. Hanging on to her mother’s skirt, Albra made a game of stepping only on the railway ties.

Around the first bend they came to a bridge which spanned a brief marsh and, behind it, a narrowing river. Sitting on a point of rock, Hannah watched her children as they swam.

Kneeling beside his mother, Paul began dropping stones into the water, watching wide eyed as they disappeared into the lake. He kept this up for some time until his mother sent him off to find his sister. After that Hannah sat alone, looking over her children. Laura, she saw, swam well, her legs sinuous and pale beneath the water. Then, noting an absence, she stood to locate the twins.

Paul and Albra looked up instinctively at the sound of their mother’s voice. Her words came lazily, elongated by the summer heat and barely audible among the reeds and mud where they squatted.

Paul waded off in search of their mother.

Let him go, she thought.

Albra sat down in the mud again. But after squishing about some more she quickly noticed her enjoyment had become hollow. It was no longer fun without Paul. Albra resented her brother for things like this, yet loved him too with the dogged endurance of an arranged marriage. She did not understand this claim he had on her, only that it restrained her. Holding her back from something for which she still had no words.

Sulking, Albra waded out of the reeds and into the water. As her feet left the ground she stretched out across the surface of the lake, trusting the water to carry her.

Seeing Albra, Elizabeth and Laura swam out to join her. But halfway out they stopped suddenly, jerking their heads toward the shore.

What’s that? Lizzie whispered.

Albra paused to watch the train as it emerged in full view. Like a giant cyclops, she thought, remembering her father.

Out of the windows hung the arms and faces of new recruits, each flushed with the anxieties of virginity and war.

Wrinkling her nose from the soot, Albra climbed up the bank toward the passing train.

From the lake Laura and Elizabeth waved with both hands at the dark cars of soldiers.

So much whistling, they remarked.

Her mother stood up, brushing the dust from her skirt. It’s only some soldiers’ song.

Albra laughed, tilting her head slightly to watch the light glancing off the water. The engine had reached the end of the lake now, letting out a whistle before turning away along the shore. Shielding her eyes again she gazed at the heavy exhaust of smoke lurking about the trees.

Thirty years later she would sit on that bridge next to where her mother, long since dead, now stood. Balancing her canvas on the abandoned trellis, she would paint this scene almost exactly as she saw it now. For that moment, however, Albra was content to watch as the black tail of smoke faded among the trees.

Farther down the shore the engine let out a final cry and the train began to speed up.

Still waving, Albra stopped as something beneath a passing car caught her eye. Its identity was almost lost in the thundering rush of steel and dust, and her first thought was that it might be an animal or piece of debris caught up by the train. But at the last moment there was a flash of recognition: a face – the mouth wrenched open as if to cry out, its eyes meeting Albra’s for an instant. And then it was gone.

Oh my God, Albra whispered.

They ate lunch that day under large canopies on the back lawn while the constable from town dealt with the body. Before going in, Albra sneaked out to watch them through the railing. A circle of men were gathered about the cart that had come back with the body. Albra could not take her eyes off the two large gunny sacks as each was lifted into the back of a truck. The constable stood to the side, one hand resting on his revolver.

There was a sombre mood among the guests that afternoon. Men sat in stalwart silence, dutifully listening while their wives leaked whispers of distress. Beside Hannah and her children sat Helena Pruitt, who sipped gin from one hand while eating delicate-looking sandwiches with the other. Hot and in want of distraction, Helena turned to Hannah as soon as she was seated.

Of course you know why they have us eating back here? An avid publicist of catastrophe, Helena was yearning to discuss the morning’s excitement.

But you weren’t there were you? She was such a young woman. A girl, really. Used to wait on Bertrand and I in the evening. Sweet, and so free of city airs. More’s the pity...

The girl Helena Pruitt spoke of was an employee of the Highland. They found her legs almost on top of the silver tray she had been carrying. The rest of her body was dragged over three miles, out of sight for all but the most athletic mourners.

That evening Albra leaned against the verandah railing watching her father blow cigar smoke out toward the lake. He was reclining in one of the mammoth wooden chairs which usually sat down by the dock. She stood aside for the waiter with oiled hair who brought him brandy in a glass wider than her hand.

Following the cigar to his mouth, she watched the tip’s vehement glow. There was a breeze coming from the east, and she shivered as the smoke disappeared into the dark.

Did you have a nice day?

She almost jumped at this sudden break in the silence. Her index finger began winding around a stray piece of thread on her dress.

We saw a train.

Calvin