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    The Tao of Relationships: A Balancing of Man and Woman
    The Tao of Relationships: A Balancing of Man and Woman
    The Tao of Relationships: A Balancing of Man and Woman
    Ebook361 pages1 hour

    The Tao of Relationships: A Balancing of Man and Woman

    By Ray Grigg

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    About this ebook

    The balancing of man and woman is not just their coming together, but their ability to stay separate. Love, like the Tao, cannot be limited by time or words. They are a process, a way of life, a balance. They move from the yin and yang of male/female to the mystical wholeness of the Tao. This thought-provoking, intuitive, and inspiring volume is for all lovers to learn from and enjoy.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherGreenDragonBooks
    Release dateSep 25, 2014
    ISBN9780893345617
    The Tao of Relationships: A Balancing of Man and Woman
    Author

    Ray Grigg

    Ray Grigg is the author of six internationally sold books on Taoism and Zen, The Tao of Relationships, The Tao of Being, The Tao of Sailing, Zen Brushpoems, The Tao of Zen, The New Lao Tzu and has been a serious student of Eastern Philosophy for more than 45 years. Prior to writing professionally since 1985, he was a teacher in senior secondary schools of British Columbia, teaching principally English and English literary history but also designing and teaching courses in fine arts, cultural history and comparative world religions. Besides writing books, he contributes a weekly environmental column, Shades of Green, to a Vancouver Island newspaper and also interviews for a local TV channel. He is a former director on the Advisory Council for The Centre For Studies in Religion and Society at the University of Victoria in British Columbia. He continues to give occasional presentations and workshops on Taoism and Zen. His latest interest, following travel, photography, Eastern philosophy, design and sailing, is kayaking. He lives with his wife, a classical musician, in a self-built home on ten acres of forested land on Quadra Island, British Columbia, Canada. A large organic garden and orchard supply much of their food needs. Their pets are the wild birds and animals that share their property.

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      Book preview

      The Tao of Relationships - Ray Grigg

      The Titles of the Chapters

      Introduction

      The Tao

      1. Practicing for Now

      2. Beyond Measure

      3. Just Doing

      4. By Remaining Still

      5. The Great Allowing

      6. The Boundless Room

      7. To Keep the Bond

      8. Have Each Other As If

      9. Becomes From Within

      10. Not a Mystery

      11. Without

      12. Foolish Play

      13. The Place to Begin

      14. The Greatness of Simple

      15. Attend to the Ordinary

      16. Balance the Universe

      17. Thoughts and Questions

      18. Because of Our Changing

      19. Finding is Recognizing

      20. And Its Passing

      21. With the Spoken Question

      22. So Obvious

      23. The Journey to the Beginning

      24. The Silent Ground

      25. Practice Humility

      26. Words Are Easy

      27. To Possess the Sky

      28. Effortless As Birth and Death

      29. Found by a Way

      30. Meeting Like Water

      31. Having Been for So Long

      32. To Find the Tao

      33. Every Is

      34. Beneath Each Knowing

      35. The Tao’s Way

      Man / Woman

      36. Close to the Great Mother

      37. Both Halves of Now

      38. The Fulfillment of Each

      39. By Unknowing

      40. Undivided Silence

      41. Foolish Seriousness

      42. The Simple and Great

      43. The Other’s Hidden Centre

      44. Only As Itself

      45. Embraced By Emptiness

      46. Within Her Holding

      47. Attached By Each Other

      48. The Trunk and Roots of Words

      49. The Uncommon Man

      50. Apprenticeships

      51. More Easily Found

      52. The Sage’s Way

      53. The One That Is Both

      54. Wholeness Again

      55. That Each May Be Greater

      56. Enter the Between

      57. When There is the Tao

      58. But Silently Laugh

      59. The Primal is Tamed

      60. Primal Dark

      61. Man’s Death in Woman

      62. Is-Not Is As Great As Is

      63. Serious Riddle

      64. Each Body’s Other Body

      65. The Tao Is Like Nothing

      66. Without Words

      67. Broad Harmony

      68. Silently Certain

      69. Letting Go

      70. If Man Wanted Only Light

      71. From Easiness With the Ordinary

      72. Young Lovers’ Riddles

      Separateness / Togetherness

      73. Arises From Itself

      74. With Beginning and End Clear

      75. Easy Silence

      76. Empty and Full

      77. Hiding

      78. In the Stillness of Right Time

      79. Separate Without Separateness

      80. Most Together

      81. One Thing Comes from Another

      82. Crooked And Round

      83. Right Mind

      84. In Each Two

      85. Third Mind

      86. Seed And Soil

      87. Finding

      88. The Obvious That Is the Secret

      89. One-Legged Mind

      90. Secret Meeting Secret

      91. Rely On the Effortless

      92. To Be Within Both

      93. To Lose and Find Both

      94. Finding Its Own Course

      95. As Easy As Being Found

      96. Deep Meeting

      97. Quite Enough

      98. With No Effort

      99. With Mind Wide Open

      100. Between Thoughts

      Hardness / Softness

      101. Between Birth and Death

      102. Winning and Losing

      103. Because of Their Softening

      104. Deep Quiet

      105. The Wisdom In Everything

      106. Softening

      107. To Be Used

      108. Between Hardness and Softness

      109. The Softness of Beginning

      110. Ocean Womb

      111. Different Equals

      112. Through His Hardness

      113. Through Her Softness

      114. Hardness Is the Burden

      115. By Emptying

      116. Leading From Behind

      117. Find Awe

      118. Both Hardness and Softness

      119. Beyond Every Stone

      120. Neither Stone nor Water

      121. Be Without Purpose

      Changing / Unchanging

      122. Let the Changing Change

      123. In Its Proper Time

      124. Ever Becoming

      125. The Downward Way

      126. Trust the Returning

      127. Each Time Has

      128. A Special Kind of Keeping

      129. In the Very Centre of Now

      130. Know Like Water

      131. Also Be River

      132. Become Changing

      133. Through Is Between

      134. The Riddle Called Thinking

      Finding / Losing

      135. Lose and Find

      136. Between One and Other

      137. Knowing Deepens

      138. Into Deeper Unknown

      139. The Moment of Finding

      140. Another Knowing

      141. Losing and Finding

      142. The Lost and Found Way

      143. Lost in Each Other

      144. Within Between

      Giving / Receiving

      145. Find Without Taking

      146. Full Of Emptiness

      147. Give Gently

      148. A Kind Of Giving

      149. Into One Disappears

      150. Outside That is Inside

      151. To Receive

      152. The Vitality Of Riddles

      153. Giving and Receiving

      154. Some Great Matter

      Fullness / Emptiness

      155. Find What Is Not

      156. Remember Emptiness

      157. Begin By Emptying

      158. All the Emptying Of River

      159. Empty Into Emptiness

      160. What Is and What Is Not

      161. Is and Is-Not

      162. Fullness Carrying Emptiness

      163. Fullness Desires

      164. Because There Is Emptiness

      165. Woman’s Emptiness

      166. Always Waiting

      167. Surrounding The Emptiness

      168. Body of Earth

      169. Accept the Breathing

      170. Like the Breathing Tao

      171. In Such a Meeting

      172. The Humility of Knowing

      173. Only the Passing Stays

      174. The Lover’s Balance

      175. More Than Greatest

      176. The Tao’s Breath

      177. Forbidden Yet Promised

      178. In an Endless Beginning

      179. Waiting Emptiness

      180. Its Own Other Body

      Union

      181. So Much Is Found

      182. Without Question

      183. From Moment To Moment

      184. With the Readiness Of Knowing

      185. Please the Primal Play

      186. All the Ancient Steps

      187. Only Body Knows

      188. Bodies Understand the Tao

      189. Beyond Union

      190. Undoing Different

      191. Deep Within Living Everything

      192. Lovers Find What Sages Seek

      193. Passing and Becoming

      194. Earth Breathes Itself

      195. The Need of Each

      196. Full Range

      197. Taking the River’s Time

      198. A Beginning of the Beginning

      199. Mere Body

      200. Mind Follows Body’s Thinking

      201. Let Body Decide

      202. Eyes Distant and Fresh

      203. Its Own Returning Time

      204. By Body’s Doing

      205. The Simple and Obvious

      206. Both Feet Must Dance

      207. A Special Stillness

      208. The Effortless Effort

      209. Without Man and Woman

      210. Amazing Now

      211. Each Time’s Return

      212. The Other Half of Wholeness

      INTRODUCTION

      This book is about love but love is never mentioned or defined. Why? Because words are only metaphor. The experience they create is vicarious. Words obstruct understanding by creating the illusion of understanding; they confine and limit with the deception that the mystery has been captured. Words only represent the authentic. When there is naming, the name is mistaken for what has been named. Sages have always known this. They understand names. And lovers are sages.

      Lovers live love. They are in it like rain is in raining and smiles are in smiling. But they cannot explain what it is because they are it. The

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