Betrayed: The Aftermath of Child Abuse
By Laurel Hall
()
About this ebook
Abused as a child, Emma Johnson spent most of her life trying to overcome feelings of guilt, shame, and worthlessness, and working through those damaging emotions with therapy.
When the Penn State scandal broke, she realized just how little the public understood the pain that abused children endured. Often, the victims of sexual and physical abuse carry that emotional turmoil with them into their adult lives. Knowing that something had to be done, Emma made it her mission to educate others about the tragic consequences of abuse.
Using Emma's own experiences and the stories of seven abused women, each of whom reveal their pain and their pasts in an effort to heal, author Laurel Hall aims to break the silence about abuse and to demonstrate the havoc such violence inflicts on people's lives.
Laurel Hall
Laurel Hall was born in Providence, Rhode Island growing up in the state until the age of seventeen. At that time she traveled to Texas and where she attended college receiving a BS in Chemistry and Mathematics and, a few years later, a Master's degree in Education. After completing college, Hall began teaching math. She taught for a total of twenty three years, the last six of which she was the department chairman in a large high school. After retiring from teaching Hall joined an aerospace firm and became a scheduler, first on Space Station Freedom and then on the International Space Station. During her working years Hall also worked as a nuclear medicine technician and had her own real estate office with her husband.. Hall is married and has two daughters and three grandchildren. She and her husband currently live in Colorado. Providence is her first ebook.
Related to Betrayed
Related ebooks
My Sister and I: We Are Survivors Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Lost Innocence: A Daughter's Account of Love, Fear and Desperation Rating: 1 out of 5 stars1/5Monsters on the Sidewalk: Memories of Child Abandonment, Domestic Violence, and Unconditional Love Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsI Blame My Mother Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsPersecuting Athena: The True Story of a Young Rape Victim and Her Fight for Justice Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsBorn Into Hell Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Boys Don't Tell: Ending the Silence of Abuse Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Abused But Not Defeated Rating: 2 out of 5 stars2/5Death of a Child Molester Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Silenced Child: Secrets & Lies Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsHer Silent Tears Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Nobody's Child Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Girl Nobody Wants Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Invisible Tears Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Little Drifters: Kathleen’s Story Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Cry Myself to Sleep: He had to escape. They would never hurt him again. Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5A Rose has Cried but Has Not Died: How I Survived Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsBreaking the Chain: Abuse, Revenge, Redemption - The True Story of a Damaged Childhood Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5The Fifth Sister: From Victim to Victor - Overcoming Child Abuse Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5The First Day of the Rest of My Life: Surviving Childhood Sexual Abuse Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsUnbroken: True Story of Sexual Abuse, Drugs, Rape, Betrayal and Triumph Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Once Innocent: Cries Unheard Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsForbidden Memories: A Memoir Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5I Remember, Daddy: The harrowing true story of a daughter haunted by memories too terrible to forget Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Boy Who Never Cried Wolf: By Grace He Survived Ten Years with a Child Predator. by Providence He Now Hunts Them Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsMichelle's Story: One Woman's Escape from a Lifetime of Abuse Rating: 2 out of 5 stars2/5Stolen Halo Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Sarah's Diary Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsFinding Anna : A True Story of Child Sexual Abuse (Revised Edition) Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5
Biography & Memoir For You
The Year of Magical Thinking Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Becoming Bulletproof: Protect Yourself, Read People, Influence Situations, and Live Fearlessly Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Elon Musk: Tesla, SpaceX, and the Quest for a Fantastic Future Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Memories, Dreams, Reflections: An Autobiography Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Kitchen Confidential Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: the heartfelt, funny memoir by a New York Times bestselling therapist Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: A Therapist, HER Therapist, and Our Lives Revealed Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Elon Musk Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Art Thief Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Great Thinkers: Simple tools from sixty great thinkers to improve your life today Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Viktor Frankl's Search for Meaning: An Emblematic 20th-Century Life Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Leonardo da Vinci Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Things My Son Needs to Know about the World Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Taste: My Life Through Food Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Trillion Dollar Coach: The Leadership Playbook of Silicon Valley's Bill Campbell Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5How to Fail: Everything I’ve Ever Learned From Things Going Wrong Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5A Crack In Creation: Gene Editing and the Unthinkable Power to Control Evolution Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Artificial Intelligence: What Everyone Needs to Know Today About Our Future Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5The Shape of a Life: One Mathematician's Search for the Universe's Hidden Geometry Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5People, Places, Things: My Human Landmarks Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Lessons From Systems Thinkers: The Systems Thinker Series, #7 Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Wild: A Journey from Lost to Found Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Code Breaker: Jennifer Doudna, Gene Editing, and the Future of the Human Race Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Meditations: Complete and Unabridged Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5
Reviews for Betrayed
0 ratings0 reviews
Book preview
Betrayed - Laurel Hall
BETRAYED
By Laurel Hall
The aftermath of child abuse
Copyright © 2013 by Laurel Hall
Loveland, CO
All rights reserved
Smashwords Edition
License Notes: No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except in the case of a reviewer, who may quote brief passages embodied in critical articles or in a review. This book is protected under the copyright laws of the United States of America. Any reproduction or other unauthorized use of the material or artwork herein is prohibited. This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
Contents
Author's Introduction
Chapter One: Penn State Sexual Abuse Scandal
Chapter Two: The First Meeting
Chapter Three: Jean
Chapter Four: Theresa & Emma
Chapter Five: Kelly
Chapter Six: Marjorie
Chapter Seven: Kelly Returns
Chapter Eight: Tia
Chapter Nine: Ruth
Chapter Ten: Janice
Chapter Eleven: Barbara
Chapter Twelve: Emma, Jean
Chapter Thirteen: Kelly and Janice
Chapter Fourteen: Ruth Returns
Chapter Fifteen: Theresa, Barbara
Chapter Sixteen: Tia & Marjorie
Chapter Seventeen: Moving on
Chapter Eighteen: What YOU can do
Acknowledgements
About the Author
Appendix: Categories of Abuse
Further Reading
Author’s Introduction
The primary purpose of writing this book was to inform the public about the emotional and psychological damage caused by sexual abuse. However, as the story evolved, further types of abuse became evident, each resulting in trauma, anguish, humiliation, and feelings of guilt, responsibility, and worse, for the victim. This will be an emotionally difficult book for some to read. It is filled with suffering and anguish, and it contains little levity. One friendly reader described it akin to walking on broken glass, barefoot.
Betrayed is the story of Emma Johnson and seven other women who suffered grievously from abuse as children. Feeling society little understood the pain sufferers of child abuse endured, Emma decided to make it her mission to educate the public. Using her own experiences and the narratives of others, Emma determined to write a book to enlighten the public on the havoc such violence inflicts in people’s lives. This is her story. While the characters are fictional composites of existing women and represent no single actual person, living or dead, the are based on real acts of violence.
Not all children who are abused become violent. Without help, however, many suffer from various forms of emotional pain, sometimes throughout their adult lives. When the massacre at Sandy Hook Elementary occurred, I began to wonder about the young man who had committed this outrageous slaughter on society’s most innocent. I believe that no baby is born violent. Something happened to that boy to cause him to develop such rage within himself, and to act out in such a horrific manner. Perhaps he was abused or bullied as a child, we don’t know, but I believe a study should be conducted on these mass killers. What were they like as children? Who were their childhood friends? What were they like in school, from kindergarten through to high school? How was their family life? What made them tick? The results might prove interesting and informative.
Our society has become so materially oriented that, for many, money and work has become number one, family second. Every child deserves a loving home—a place where he feels, safe, wanted, and loved. But, unfortunately, that is not always the case, and it can have terrible consequences. It is challenging to have a public conversation about the violence perpetuated against children, especially sexual violence. It is easier to pretend it does not exist. But it does. Let us begin that dialogue now. We must continue to teach others about abuse: what it is and what the signs are, and how to talk with an abused child. If we, the adults, do nothing, it is my belief that events like those at Newtown, Columbine, Aurora, Tucson and others will occur over and over again, and the sorrow will be unrelenting.
LH
Chapter One: Penn State Sexual Abuse Scandal
It was a perfect autumn day, reminiscent of Indian summer. There was a refreshing chill in the air and the leaves were beginning to turn, flaming red touched with burnt orange and golden yellow. Overhead, a flock of Canada geese, flying in their usual V
formation, were honking at each other, making a commotion that could be heard throughout the park. With their mothers nearby, several children were playing on the swings and slides, laughing merrily, having fun. Jon and Emma had spent the afternoon walking through the park, enjoying the delicious weather, the sights and sounds of nature, the laughter of playing children, and each other’s company. The path ended at their favorite restaurant, and after dining they returned home. A full moon shone brightly on the lake behind their home, a lovely sight.
Beautiful, isn’t it?
remarked Emma, as she sat down with her husband to read the evening newspaper.
After a few minutes, Jon put the paper down. I’m disgusted! This sexual abuse scandal at Penn State—the cover up makes me furious.
He gestured to the paper. Those students were betrayed by their teachers!
Emma looked up. Reflecting on her life for a moment, she said quietly, Most people have no clue about the psychological and emotional wounds sexual abuse leaves on a child.
"I’ve watched how you suffered, Emma. I know first-hand the pain you endured. And how long it took for you to heal. I guess that has given me an awareness most people don’t have; that’s why I get so angry. The focus is on the wrong thing—it should be on the victims, helping them heal.
Because of you, I have tried to learn as much as I can about child abuse. I know the harm created, the degrading effect it has on a child. The damage continues into adulthood. I wouldn’t be surprised if many of the inmates in our jails suffered child abuse. It’s a horrifying existence, and a huge cost to society.
But what can we, as individuals, do to rectify this situation? How can I help other women who have suffered as I have or help them to heal? How can we make the public aware of the emotional harm done to children?
Emma asked.
I don’t know.
Jon ran his fingers through his hair in frustration.
Over the following weeks, Emma contemplated the conversation. How could she, one lone woman, begin a public conversation about the trail of destruction that sexual abuse leaves behind?
After much thought, Emma presented an idea to her husband. I was thinking of forming a small group, maybe eight women who have been abused—a place where they could share the consequences abuse has had on their lives, and how they survived. After gathering all of their information, I could write a book revealing their stories to the world. It would take a lot of courage on their parts to divulge secrets they have held for years. What do you think?
Jon put down the book he was reading and looked at her thoughtfully. It’s something to consider. Do you think you’re qualified for the task?
I don’t know. I’m not a therapist, but I have had years of therapy and analysis. I know from personal experience their pain, their suffering. Perhaps we could help each other.
How would you go about it? Would you establish rules?
Oh, yes. As a matter of fact, I wrote up a few. Here they are.
She handed Jon a piece of floral notepaper that contained the list.
1. Everything said in the room must be confidential
2. Treat everyone with respect.
3. Listen, but do not judge.
4. Do not ask probing questions that might embarrass the speaker.
5. Encourage and/or compliment when appropriate.
6. Do not interrupt when another is speaking.
7. Be on time and try not to miss a meeting.
Can you think of any others?
she asked him.
Jon shook his head. That’s a good start. Where will you hold these meetings, Emma?
I don’t know. Do you have any ideas for a place?
Maybe.
Do you plan to be upfront with the women and tell them you hope to write a book?
Yes.
Then give it a try.
Jon smiled and hugged his wife of more than fifty years.
* * *
Several weeks passed and Emma continued to mull over her idea. What would it achieve? What kind of format should she use? As a retired teacher, should she make the meetings educational as well? Would the women open up and reveal their secrets?
Doubts crept into her mind. What made her feel she was capable of helping women? Would she be effective or create more harm?
She decided to do some research on her own to begin the project. What she learned was horrifying. The cruelty some children had suffered at the hands of their parents, relatives, school bullies, neighbors, and supposed friends was incredible. Emma was surprised to learn that the most common form of abuse children were exposed to was neglect by their parents or caregiver. Physical, sexual, and emotional abuse followed—in that order. But if a child suffered from one form of abuse, the chances were that he or she had experienced a second as well. The consequences of such brutality were frightening. Exploited children might suffer from multiple problems: poor self-esteem, self-loathing, shame, fear of being found out, personality disorders, and much, much more. It was then that Emma realized what a monumental job she was undertaking.
She decided to discuss her idea with her friend Theresa, a woman who had been abused by her father and who was currently in therapy. Attractive and with a beautiful smile, Theresa was tall, slim, and sported a crop of beautiful red hair.
I think it’s brilliant. I would like to be a part of it. May I?
Theresa said when Emma explained her ideas. The cobalt blouse Theresa was wearing enhanced her blue eyes, which shone with enthusiasm.